u/AnnaAtisuto

Are here any women that had vaginismus but managed to treat it fully? Like, from not being able to use a tampon, to fully controlling the muscles down there? Being able to use toys or not stressing about gynaecologist appointments?

I (20F) am friend with T (19M) for eight to nine years now. We met in school and were besties since. He is disabled, having to use a wheelchair and being able to walk only very small amount of time. While I was born with physical difference that is only aesthetic. We connected because of how different we were but also due to having similar experiences with mild bullying and stuff like that.

A month ago, we were at a burger place, eating and talking about things. I was telling him about a specific series and a topic pf multiverses and parallel realities came up. It wasn’t really serious but we began discussing how maybe there are other versions of us. Like me but a male, him but female, similar things. Somehow it went towards him saying that there is maybe a universe in which he is healthy. He said how his life would be different in all the aspects, like social circles and all. You jokingly asked if we would still be friends if he was healthy and was a bit shocked when he told me no. He wasn’t joking, it was like he was genuinely imagining and just decided that no, wouldn’t have happened. I know it sounds ridiculous as Im describing it now, but it genuinely made me rethink our whole relationship. Mainly because, there were too many instances when I was the only person who was with him in the hardest moments. After surgeries, when loosing friends, I stayed when he threw tantrums or treated me more like an unpaid helper than a friend. Yet he told me that.

Now I wanted to ask here, because I don’t know who else to talk to about it. Am I reading too much into it all? Am I overeating? Should I just get over it or maybe talk to him even though he probably doesn’t even remember that conversation? I feel very frustrated right now, would appreciate any advice.

EDIT: Some people misunderstood me, which is fair. Yes, part pf why we bonded was related to our differences, but that wasn’t the only reason. We love horror movies, have same humor and share things in common. That’s why it hurt so much, he made me believe he actually cherished the friendship, not just the fact that I helped him with his stuff related to the illness and then told me this.