My baby is 4 months old and I have been told I’m spoiling him.
I was out with some family today and was told a few things that apparently I’m doing wrong with my baby, and it honestly left me questioning myself a bit. I feed him on cue and often feed him to sleep, and I was told that I’m spoiling him and making him too dependent on me.
I’ve tried a soother, and he liked it for a little while but doesn’t really tolerate it anymore. Sometimes he only feeds for a few minutes and gets distracted, so I was told that he’s probably not actually hungry and that I should stick to a 3–4 hour feeding schedule. I’ve been trying to time his feeds and create more of a fixed schedule, but it’s difficult because he’s not a big napper, and nursing is also an easy way to settle him when he’s fussy.
He also sometimes really struggles with the car, especially on longer drives. There have been a couple of times when he’s cried so hard that he gets sweaty and seems almost out of breath, which makes me really anxious, especially when I’m alone with him or we’re on the highway. So I try to keep car rides shorter when it’s just me and him. I was told that I need to be stricter and let him cry it out, but I find that really difficult when he’s that upset.
I genuinely thought we were doing okay, but after today I’m not too sure. I didn’t think I was coddling or spoiling him. It’s hard to watch him cry so much but I recognize I need to be more disciplined.
Update: It’s hard being a FTM, and I don’t think people realize how much their negative comments can affect someone. Thank you so much to everyone for your supportive and kind comments. Your words made me feel so much more confident.