How do I (17F) break up with my boyfriend (17M) who is a proud toba*cco sm*ggler?
Hi, my boyfriend and I have been together for 1 year and 4 months now after meeting through a colleague at our private school. We're both turning 18 on July and our birthday's just 10 days apart. He treats me really well, picks me up on his ADV bike for dates, gives me flowers and gifts, and has always been sweet and loyal to me. But over time, I started realizing that the lifestyle his family lives probably does not come from clean money. When he introduced me to them, I saw how wealthy they really were despite trying to appear middle class from the outside. They own luxury vehicles, spend huge amounts on expensive things, and all of his siblings study in private schools. Meanwhile, I only entered private school through scholarship, and I grew up with a single mother who works as a government employee while me and my siblings mostly studied in public schools.
For the past few months, I’ve been carrying this heavy guilt because I know the gifts and money I receive from him most likely came from illegal wealth. I was raised to stand firmly by my morals, so this situation honestly bothers me more than I can explain. He never openly talked to me about their “family business,” he just told me that he helps his dad on their business as the eldest child of their family. but I eventually found out through his best friend and later confirmed it myself when I saw conversations on his phone involving underground transactions and clients. What hurts is that he’s genuinely a good boyfriend to me, but he was secretive about who he was. I think he just knew I would struggle accepting that side of his life.
I really love him, but I know love ain't enough when your values no longer align. I’m scared to open this conversation because I don’t know if he’s willing to change that life for himself or for us. And if he isn’t, then maybe I’ll eventually have to walk away no matter how painful it is. I don’t want to hurt him harshly because despite everything, he’s still someone I care about deeply. I just don’t think I can betray my own principles to stay in a relationship that constantly weighs on my conscience.