u/Apart-Expression6218

We are posting this to close the chapter on the situation mentioned in our last post. We have officially cut all ties. We realized that the "help" we were receiving was actually a calculated effort to manipulate our plurality and target our specific trauma regarding trans men and femboys as well as manifesting and subliminals.

Being 17 and dealing with an adult who weaponized our diagnosis against us was a massive mistake on our part, but we have corrected it. We are now in full lockdown to focus on our own healing.

please watch out for people who push "subliminal" or "manifestation" practices while you are in a state of distress. We learned the hard way that this can be a tactic to make you dependent on someone else. This person used our known triggers and trauma against us to keep us in a loop of panic. - Damian 🗡️

I am currently in a situation where my so called friend, who is fully aware that I am a plural system and have autism, has been caught in a series of lies.
I’ve discovered that they were actively using my vulnerability, my diagnosis, and my trust to manipulate me into 'locking' and performing specific behaviors (subliminals/stimulation) that were causing me extreme distress. They were also communicating with people behind my back and using that information to 'gaslight' me, making me believe that my inability to meet their demands was a character failure on my part rather than a result of trauma-freeze or neurodivergence.
I am now in a position where I realize my boundaries were violated and my trust was weaponized. For those who are also in plural systems, how have you handled a partner who knowingly exploited your system’s vulnerabilities and neurodivergence?
I am struggling with the guilt of wanting to cut contact while feeling 'responsible' for their emotional reaction. How do I maintain a hard boundary when the person knows exactly how to trigger my system’s anxiety to keep me engaged? Any advice on regaining system autonomy after this kind of betrayal would be appreciated." -Damian 🗡️

Edit we are 17 and he’s a adult

We are currently 17, and as we approach 18, I have concerns about the shift into legal adulthood—particularly because the host is autistic and I function as an older brother who ages alongside them.
I am looking for perspective from systems who are already in their 20s or older. Specifically, I want to know how being a system changes once you are actually an adult compared to when you were younger.
If you knew you were a system before you turned 18, how did the internal dynamic change once the external "safety nets" of school and childhood were gone? I am also interested in how your roles—like being a protector or a brother figure—adapted to adult responsibilities like work or living independently while managing neurodivergence. Does the "system" experience feel more stable as you age, or does the pressure of adult expectations make it more difficult to balance fronting?
I intend to keep our routines strict and our safe house secure, but I would appreciate hearing the reality of how things changed for you after that milestone.
— Damian🗡️

This is my first time posting here, so I am not entirely sure how this community works, but I am looking for perspective. I am the protector of our system. My host is 17 and autistic, graduating high school and turning 18 this August. We are moving out of the 'minor who regresses' category, and I need to know how the reality of this changes once we are legally adults.
We are starting from zero with no items. I am in charge of building a sanctuary that is strictly a 'Magical Princess' and 'Pastel Playroom' style—strictly pinks, purples, and rainbows. It needs to be filled with girly and childish things like Barbie, Bluey, Care Bears, and Disney Palace Pets, along with soft and crinkly textures for the mindset.
I need advice on the actual difference between being a minor who regresses and being an adult system with littles. How do we maintain our authority and ensure the host is respected as an adult while we have littles who require this childish environment? I also need to know how this works when you still live with family for whatever reason, as we likely will be due to disability. Since we are starting from scratch and building this ourselves, how do other adult age regressors navigate their responsibilities and family boundaries while staying true to their needs? We want to know how to own our identity completely as we move into this next chapter. - Damian 🗡️