u/AppealAltruistic9831

My fiancé has family in another state. In the 7 years I’ve been with him his parents have visited twice. We’ve visited twice as well but just for weddings. Some context: I don’t have the strongest relationship with his mom (stepping over boundaries often) and his father and I are on a hi/bye basis.

Over the last couple months of planning our wedding we’ve had some issues regarding his family. We agreed no one would stay at our home during the wedding (I knew in the end his parents would stay and that’s fine/it’s kind of expected. I wish it would have been communicated earlier), I’m constantly being asked by them about things they need for the wedding: hair/makeup. Where to stay/what area/what to do. Little things that I think don’t need to be asked of the bride but probably the groom/google.

We had another conversation (me and his family-he was not present during this conversation) in which they indicated to us they’ll be staying in our area after the wedding and essentially we should show them around after the wedding.

I feel as though our wedding is something that is happening on any other weekend that they’d come to visit and see the area we live in (which to them it is but to me it’s my wedding week!) I have no issues with them doing their own thing. I just wish they’d come and visit another time to do all these things with us. The expectation of us having free time before and after the wedding is what gets me and frustrates me.

My partner says he’ll plan stuff with them if that’s the case but am I wrong for not wanting to do anything with either sides of the family (mine or his) for a couple days before and after the wedding?

TLDR: out of town family expects us to set aside time after the wedding to show them around the town we live in and my partner says yes, am I wrong for wanting time before and after the wedding to decompress?

Edit: SORRY GUYS ITS BUD NOT BUTT 💀