r/wedding

Two of my friends are getting married in a month. I introduced the couple so I’d really like to go. But they recently sent out the wedding details and its standing room only. The ceremony will be about 90 minutes, during the mid afternoon, outdoors.

Im worried about this a bit, as I really struggle to stand in one place for long periods of time. I have flat feet, and probably something else wrong with me I’m not aware of. By 30 minutes standing, I have bad foot pain. By 60 minutes, my pain level is quite high and radiates through my legs and back. By 90 minutes, I will likely be in intense pain. I also somewhat often get dizzy standing in place for long periods of time. I confirmed this when going to a concert recently. It was a big struggle and hard to focus on things beyond the pain. It got a bit easier on my back and dizziness wise when I was able to walk around after the show, but after standing over an hour, as stated above, I had radiating pain throughout my legs and back. I even wore my comfiest shoes with the best support.

I thought about asking if I could bring one of those folding portable mini stools, but while they are very kind people who would likely oblige or not be offended by me asking, I also know they’ve put a lot of care into the aesthetic of the wedding and I don’t want to ruin the photos or look of it. I selfishly also don’t want to stand out, especially during someone’s big day. But i also dont want to be in lots of pain, wincing in photos, shifting weight around constantly, or worst case scenario, suffering a bad dizzy spell and causing a scene.

What can I do to help make standing through the wedding easier on my body/or ways I can adapt to it? How have y’all handled situations like these at your own wedding/weddings you’ve attended?

Thanks in advance.

EDIT: just because some people are saying 90 minutes standing is not okay, it did occur to me after posting that i dont really know how long a ceremony tends to last, and the 90 minutes could very well be a mix the ceremony and social time where I could walk around after. The couple are incredibly sweet people, and very considerate, so I don’t think they’d do something that seems like it would cause many people discomfort!

I know this has been asked multiple times in here but the posts aren’t exactly relatable to our situation. Most posts involve majority of the guest list having to fly down and are out of state/area. The venue we love is completely booked out for next year on Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays from January-November. It’s an amazing venue and we are thinking of booking a Thursday wedding in September 2027. We only have a handful of guests that would be flying in and they don’t work M-F 9-5 jobs. The rest of the people on our guest list are about a 35-45 minute drive, is this still considered rude? Majority of the locals don’t have M-F 9-5 jobs either. It’s not about the money (although of course it’s a bonus) but we really love the venue and what it offers. Seen comments saying it’s about knowing your guest list, agreed?

Edit: Wedding would be from 4pm-10pm, we have the option for an extra 2 hours (10-12pm) but unsure on that decision still.

Recently engaged in June! I have a lot to plan when it comes to the wedding. We also have to plan the honeymoon! Tell me where you went? (We kinda want to go out of country) tell me your experience!

So my SIL is getting married this year and for the Bachelorette celebration, the MOH asked me to help customize some party favors with my Cricut machine. My question has to do with etiquette I guess. The MOH has worked SO hard planning this weekend trip and making sure everything’s perfect, would it be rude/out of line/in any way negative of me to make an extra favor for everyone that she didn’t ask for that way she also has a surprise waiting for her? Nothing big, just like a keychain or something along those lines. I’m leaving the planned favors at a family member’s house for her to pick up well before the party since she’s coming from out of town, so if I DO make the extras, then I’m planning to attach a note saying “hey you don’t have to pass these out if you don’t want to, but I thought you deserved a fun surprise after all the hard work you’ve done!”

I’ve already got social anxiety and not a whole lot of people IRL I could ask for advice, but that’s what Reddit is for, right? lol thank you in advance for your thoughts!!! <3

I would love some advice on this and see if other brides have had similar experiences. My fiancé and I booked our wedding venue for summer of 2027. We only toured one venue and I absolutely fell in love with it. It’s a flower farm and we would plan to camp the whole weekend with all of our closest family and friends. It really is a dream and so so stunning.

What I’m struggling with is the price and already having regret that we are spending so much for 1 day. We have the opportunity to go to Peru this fall but with the wedding we will likely need to say no (an experience I would otherwise try to make work). I originally wanted a micro wedding and then a big party (either the day of or a week or so after) that all of our family and friends could go to. Instead with this setup we would have everything in one day with around 75 people. My fiancé has a big family but mine is relatively small but people would be incredibly upset if there aren’t invited to the ceremony. We have also already told a lot of people about what we were planning for our wedding and the venue we booked so I don’t know if it’s too late to change

My questions:

1. Other brides, did you ever regret your venue choice and change while planning?
2. Did you regret not having a bigger wedding? Has anybody regretted having a smaller wedding?
3. Thoughts on micro weddings/ how many people makes sense before just jumping to a bigger wedding

Any other advice would be so helpful!!

Edit: I definitely described the “camping” wrong. In no way would this be a required thing. The bridal party and close family would stay the day before (they want to) and all guests have the OPTION to stay the second night if they want to. There is also the option to bring trailers/ car camp or just make sure they have a DD and go home since the venue is 40 minutes from most of our guests in any direction. The camping area is full tree cover and we are in western Washington so most of our hottest days are few and far between.

my best friends wedding is this weekend and i'm so nervous to give my speech 😅 any advice on how to not have a panic attack before i get up there (lol) and any feedback on the speech is appreciated !!

speech:

hello everyone, i'm NAME, and i have the honor of standing here today as one of BRIDE maids of honor.

BRIDE and i met our freshman year of college in a chemistry lab led by a professor with the thickest russian accent you've ever heard. we immediately bonded over the fact that we could not understand a word the man said and that we were probably going to fail the lab. little did we know that would be the start of a lifelong friendship. from there we spent 4 years together in countless lectures and labs, in stuffy library study rooms where we did more yapping than homework, and at many celebratory brunches whether it was us barely passing organic chemistry, finally finishing our degrees, or simply just because the weather was nice and we needed to skip class. a lot has changed since then - but our friendship has remained a constant in my life.

now, i could spend this next minute telling you all about college BRIDE stories - and trust me, there are plenty. but, as funny as those stories are, they’re not what define BRIDE to me. When I think of BRIDE i think of someone who is the kind of friend that embodies "girlhood” - she makes life feel lighter, kinder, and more fun simply by being in it. I think of someone who i know will always be in my corner, who has the biggest heart, is fiercely loyal, and has the best sense of humor. someone who can't cook to save her life, but gives the best advice. I think of someone who would do anything for the people she loves. And when GROOM came along, it was clear that he was someone who would show up for her in that same unwavering way.

GROOM, thank you for loving my best friend. seeing you two together, it’s impossible not to notice how much you love and care for BRIDE. i know you would do absolutely anything for her, even though some things might come with some sass and an eye roll. and thank you for feeding her because im pretty sure she would live off a liquid diet if it weren't for you. not only are you an incredible partner to my friend, but you are an all around good person, and I’m glad that I get to call you my friend too.

You two truly are each other’s missing piece - opposite, yet you fit together so naturally, complementing each other in every way. where BRIDE is free-spirited, GROOM grounds her. where GROOM is practical, BRIDE brings the spontaneity. where one is organized and tidy, the other is not (I won’t say who’s who for that one). despite their differences there is one thing that they share for certain - they both love each other so deeply.

so BRIDE and GROOM, here is my wish for you both. I wish you laughter during stressful seasons, understanding during hard seasons, support during changing seasons, and a love that continues to grow during every season. I am so incredibly happy for you both, cheers to you and the start of forever.

Curious if you think in a perfect world you’d want to leave for your honeymoon 24-48 hrs after the wedding, or weeks or months after?

Or if you’ve already done it, what did you do and how did you like it?

The bride has proposed a week-long trip to a Caribbean island for her bachelorette in Jan/Feb 2027. The bride is in her late 30s and we are more or less in that age range We live in a cold climate and I generally go to the Caribbean in the winter to escape the snow...so in theory I could go since I allot a week for a winter getaway. However it's becoming increasingly clear that the bride expects all the guests to do everything together in recognition and celebration of her and her upcoming wedding. Which of course is the purpose of the trip but it's 7 days. Someone suggested an island that she would like to explore and the bride said she is open to any destination but really is focused on staying at the resort except for maybe a few club nights. I haven't been to bachelorette in a while and I travel frequently either solo or with my family/husband or friends...but I am use to breaking away from the group for alone time or to do separate activities. Before I accept...I want to understand if that is the general expectation that the entire time is focused on the bride despite we are all paying and taking time off work for a vacation.... thoughts?

Hello Reddit Family,

Posting this because I needed a safe space to vent. First off, it's important to mention that I have a complicated relationship with my father. He and my mom divorced when I was very young, he remarried and had 3 kids, and kind of left me out to dry in the process. Throughout my life, I see him 1-2x a year, though less and less as the years pass. He means well, but he's a bit of a narcissist and kind of clueless how his absentee vibe has impacted me. I have a superficial but friendly relationship with my siblings from my dad's second marriage, but we are not that close. I identify as an only-child.

Fast forward to now: I'm 38, getting married to my Italian fiance in a beautiful villa in Sorrento in September. My mom, who basically raised me completely on her own, is also funding the wedding. She absolutely hates my father, and I know if it were up to her he would 100% not be invited to the wedding. A part of me feels guilty for inviting him since he won't contribute to it financially and I don't want my mom to have to throw a party for him in any way.

I saw my father recently and he was asking the life update questions, "Are you seeing anyone?" and I said no. I need help processing the guilt I feel by not inviting my father or any of my siblings to my wedding. I know if he was there, I would feel that twinge of sadness of him acting like a father on the most important day of my life, but not deserving that role or recognition because he has been MIA my entire life.

I am anxious about posting information or pictures or really anything related to my wedding on social media because I am worried he or my siblings will find out that I just straight up did not invite them or mention the wedding to them ever.

Is this insane? Is this ok? I feel so guilty but I also know it's sort of how it has to go down.

Thanks in advance for the pep talk. My wedding is in 60 days from today.

Hello!
I’m getting married this Friday July 10. I’m organizing my vendor tip envelopes. There is the main lady who is doing my (bride) hair and makeup and she’s getting a cash tip. She has a couple assistants who will be doing the bridal party and family. Do I need to tip them as well if they aren’t working directly on my hair and makeup? I’m assuming the ladies they are doing will tip them themselves but didn’t know if one from me was also necessary. Thanks!

Usually a wedding ceremony follows a traditional order that consists of something like the processional, officiant's welcome, readings, vows, ring exchange, pronouncement, and recessional.

What are some unique or personal touches to this traditional order that you witnessed at a wedding?

Mine ist the bride singing a Song while her father played the melody on the guitar. It was the most memorable Moment of the Wedding for me (luckily she has a great singing voice).

If this isn’t the right sub to ask this, please tell me where I can. If it is allowed, I’m going to my aunts hen do in September and I’m a big gifter. I hate showing up empty handed as I feel guilty, even if they don’t mention it. We are al chipping in a bit to pay for it, but I don’t want to be the only one turning up without a gift for the bride. Alternatively, I don’t want to be the only one to bring a gift for the bride. Is it normal to bring a gift, or would it be weird to do so?

All the names are fake <3

Hi everyone. My name is Ella and I have the privilege of being Kiara's best friend. I'm surprised to be standing here. Mostly because Kiara and I used to talk about living on a women-only compound. No men whatsoever. Why? Because historically speaking guys bring nothing but pain. No offense to those of you in this room tonight. Obviously, the little compound plan isn't going to happen anymore. Unless we give Jake a little hut of his own outside the gates. As someone who has witnessed lots of less than pleasant marriages, it's easy to be a little jaded or apprehensive about the topic. Especially when it comes to someone I love as a sister. And to be very honest, I only met Jake once before they got engaged at Kiara's birthday party. And to be very honest, I wasn't too impressed. But then I met him a second time. And I got to see them as an actual couple. I got to watch them interact with one another. I got to see how they treat one another. And most of all, I got to witness something I didn't get to see too often. Kiara actually happy. So as someone who had stopped believing in marriage or at least happy marriages a while ago, in just a few short weeks, Kiara and Jake have managed to actually make me a believer. Because now I'm convinced that no two people have ever been better for each other.

Turn to the bride and groom.

And I pray that God keeps you guys happy and healthy for the rest of your lives. That he protects you from people who wish you harm. That he allows you to prosper. And that you're together not till death do you part but till heaven reunites you.

My FIL and I are paying for my fiancé and I's wedding, essentially splitting the expenses in half. We wanted to have a small wedding with less than 150 guests, with those guests being a collection of our friends in addition to family friends who have known us for a very long time. My parents wanted a big wedding and kept getting upset when we said we didn't want a big wedding. So, much to my fiancé's reluctance, we relented and upped our max guest count to 250 guests. Her father was nice enough to accept that he would continue to pay for half the wedding, despite now that all of their guests, my guests, and my fiancé's guests in total would be less than half the guests at our wedding. Now, my parents are saying that the guest list might reach up to 300 guests. I put my foot down and said if they want to have even more extra guests they would have to pay for each of those extra guests. They got very upset with me and thought that was an absurd request. They finally relented and said they would pay for those extra guests. But, now they are inviting completely random people that my family has had no relationship with, but my parents may have interacted with one member of each of these unnecessary parties a couple of times before.

My fiancé is shocked by this behavior and keeps telling me that it is insane how my parents are making these requests without paying for anything yet. They reluctantly agreed to pay for the flowers just recently, but that wasn't without several arguments saying that the girl's side should pay for ALL of the flowers. Mind you, her father is already paying for half the wedding for guests that he's mostly never met !

Now today they are saying that it is messed up for my fiancé and I to say that they haven't paid for anything yet because I have paid for half the wedding, and therefore it is like they paid. My dad said that our money and their money is the same. For context, I have been working a professional career job since I graduated college 6 years ago and have made my own money and paid for my own expenses, even before then. We do NOT share finances.

What am I to do here ? I am caught in the middle with my fiancé saying my parents are not contributing enough and controlling too much relative to their financial contribution, whereas my parents are saying they can do whatever they want and invite whoever they want.

We are one month away from our wedding. I just want our wedding to be really nice, especially since I spent so much money on it.

Hi all! My wedding is less than a week away and I’m very concerned for what my dad might say at the wedding reception. Recently he’s been getting very bad in the group chat , talking about immigrants and other very politically charged issues that are driving us all nuts. He’s very right wing and believes a lot of crazy things from Fox News. My fiancé is the son of an immigrant (first gen) and also has family members here in the states that may or may not be legal. My dad has actually met these people and loved them but he didn’t know they were not legal . It’s gotten so bad though recently that a few people in the chat are wondering if he is actually racist and I just cannot tolerate that behavior at our wedding . Any advice from anyone else dealing with these issues? I def will be having a talk with him not to mention any political or controversial topics at the wedding , but he really doesn’t listen to any of us when we ask him to stop, so I’m not sure what to do.

I bought these heels from Amazon
https://a.co/d/01xXm5KI

And they SUCK. They make a popping noise when you walk and it didn’t start doing that until I’d already broken them in a bit. Someone in the reviews mentioned this but I missed it. It’s incredibly annoying and so loud you can’t ignore it. It’s every step.

Just wondering if anyone else got low block heels like this from Amazon and they DIDNT make a popping sound. Please stick to heels that can be worn outside as it is a wedding on grass. Thank you.

My (bride) mom bought a dress at David’s Bridal back in April for my January wedding. Prior to buying a dress, she showed me all kinds of dresses on Azazie, Jj’s house, Amazon, SHEIN, Glamlora, and AliExpress. I told her to try on dresses. She found one that she loves, and purchased it. Awesome. But now, it’s 3 months later, I thought we were behind this, but she’s looking at dresses on all of those sites and more now.

It’s stressing me out a lot that she’s even considering a dress from Amazon, SHEIN, Glamlora, or AliExpress! And she just keeps sending me pics of dresses that she’s found and I tell her not to even look at those sites, but she’s since ordered 2 from Amazon (that have terrible reviews, nonetheless).

I don’t even know what to say to her. I don’t know how to get across to her, because I feel like she just isn’t listening to me.

Any advice or suggestions are welcome.