u/Appropriate-Slip-118

I myself didn't get a lot of support growing up and it seems a lot of my behaviors like not knowing how to make eye contact, obsessing over hobbies, repeating phrases from tv, and others were just considered weird and used as an excuse for people to target me.

I feel let down a lot by the lack of services in this country. Even when seeking help sometimes I'm afraid to disclose as the neighbours and community are so nosey to the point where if anyone in town does anything everyone else knows it.

I feel really tired of the culture of shaming and bullying here and then people saying "it's just the craic" or "lads being lads".

Has anyone else had the same experiences?

Edit:

I just wanted to thank everyone here from the bottom of my heart for sharing their experiences as it takes a lot of courage ♥️. It took me a long time to gain the courage to even accept the fact I may be neurodivergent as it was beaten into me literally and figuratively that I was "defective", "a freak", "a weirdo", and "a lurk". I still haven't told everyone including some members of immediate family but I have been able to bring it up to some people in my life and to seek help.

As saddened as I am to hear others experiences have been just as bad as mine and in some cases worse. It made me feel less alone and I cannot overestimate the help that's been 🙂 I wish I had had the courage to ask for help during my teenage years or pushed more as I felt even if I asked the bullying and isolation would've gotten worse. I really have to thank this community and r/autism for helping me to understand I'm not an isolated case and that there are others out there like me who've been failed and have had the same feelings and struggles.

God bless each and everyone of you, it really is hard to share these experiences still but this helped me a lot.

Just a bit of background I'm late diagnosed got diagnosed a few months ago at 30. I'm not sure how I went this long without being diagnosed when I had so many signs as a kid like: running out of movie theatre crying when the sound was too loud and having to go to classes for bad hand eye coordination and having to be taught by teachers to look people in the eye as well as dropping out of education at numerous times of my life.

I'm wondering if anyone else has the same experience as me. I've struggled with sleep my entire life regularly experiencing insomnia, anxiety, or my worst memories and personal failings replaying in my mind before I go to sleep. I'm not sure how common this exhaustion is and starting a new job and worrying about probation alongside having attention issues at work(probably related to sleep issues) is really not helping.

Is poor sleep and insomnia an autistic thing? My parents and girlfriend keep telling me to get a blood test but I've had this issue all my life. I had a blood test before when I was 12 that showed nothing and have a severe phobia of needles to the point I let an orthodontist reshape my teeth with a drill with no anaesthetic(don't recommend at all 😅). I think at the moment it's more of a neurological thing as socialisation and being in the office drains me when I was on holiday the last week I regularly slept well although I did wake up tired for a few days.

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