u/AppropriateBell9636

It's been well over a year since I went no-contact. Though I believe there's been a smear campaign, from all the people who are suddenly too busy to see me. Who knows, maybe they are really busy, but it has been so noticeable. I don't let it bother me too much, most of the time...I think if it is a smear campaign, it says more about them to just leave without checking in on me. If it's not, well, maybe my friendships weren't all that strong and it's for the best.

But I do feel alone and a bit hurt. And I know the key to healing is to keep busy, to keep my mind occupied with other things. Things have gotten better as time has gone on, but there are still days/moments where I completely doubt myself and think I got everything wrong. That I'm a bad person—even though I really can't find any evidence of that. I still end up searching, and I know I can't keep doing that...I just end up spiralling, trying to find explanations for why I feel alone, and then it just takes me back to analyzing everything again, being paranoid and wondering if I should try and communicate further to fix things. Don't worry, I won't—I definitely think the best thing is to maintain no-contact and keep away from him and everyone in his circle.

I just...I don't want to keep going back to this. Before I met him, I was confident and knew myself, and trusted myself. At least, I felt I did...now I just question everything and am unsure, and I really don't trust people or my instincts in the same way. Which I don't want....I know the majority of people are kind and mean well, and they don't deserve to be thought of in the same light as him.

I've reminded myself of this many times over the past year, and it helps...but then again, days like today where I spiral and question it all over again. How long will this go for? Does anyone have any suggestions or techniques to use in the moment or ways to make things easier?

Earlier this year I was seeing a therapist for a few months.

Then in May I got a call from the owner of the practice saying that they had left. Which was a surprise to me, they hadn't said anything to me in our last session. I wasn't thrilled about it, but I took the practice up on their offer to pair me with a different therapist at the practice, and that went fine. Though I'm no longer seeing a therapist as things have shifted/I'm busy with other stuff.

I just got a message on Linkedin from the former therapist who left requesting to be friends. Their note is odd too, saying I may know they left and they're wondering if I'm fine. It's interesting because I have an entirely private profile, and you have to put in my email address/phone number to find me.

I've decided to ignore the request, but this is weird, right? Like...wouldn't it be on the former patient to reach out if they really wanted to use the same therapist? I figured they had been fired, and this kinda is confirming that for me. Anyway, any thoughts appreciated.