Going through my 17 year old son. I have good reason but still feel guilty. Am I in the wrong?
My 17 year old son has been drinking a lot lately on the weekend with his friends. I have always tried to encourage honesty and also try to be realistic as a parent. I emphasize never driving obviously and, if you are going to drink, do it in moderation. He has NOT been doing it in moderation lately on the weekends. In addition, I find zins on him all the time. And found a weed pen in his room twice. I'm worried about him. Then yesterday he lied and I caught him. It has always been my rule that if you lie to me, I get to go through your phone. So I took his phone but he won't tell me his passcode. So I hid his phone so he can't find it but we are in a standoff because he will not give me his passcode. He is SO angry at me and has said some incredibly hurtful things to me in this whole phone standoff. He says that it's an invasion of his privacy. My instinct is to stand firm in requiring him to give me his passcode but I am starting to second guess myself. Help!