u/AtheistBibliophile

I knew academia can be brutal but i didn’t know how completely it would shatter me till this cycle. I applied to 7 places for history. Got 3 interviews. 6 rejections. And one interview is coming up so I don’t know the outcome yet. It is thoroughly devastating and has left me completely broken as i never had any other plans since i was 15. My grades are fine, great even in undergrad as I received gold medal. Upper second(69%) in masters. I’ve never recieved anything but appreciation and sincere critical feedback from my profs, who were all convinced of my potential for phd, some even took it for granted. I have never had great self esteem but it convinced me that at least some uni will take me. Apparently not! I am unemployed, without any skills other than intellectual if that even counts and I’m stuck in a conservative family which constantly reminds me everyday about my lack of worth and curses me for taking humanities. At this point, i believe they’re right to do so. My mental health is in pieces. It’s the worst I’ve ever been and i have completely isolated myself with no support. I moved away from here to study and after five years elsewhere i really don’t know anyone in my family place to even talk to. U don’t know what to do. I genuinely don’t.

Hello. I spent my years growing up in the city but then drifted apart, and lost touch with any friends I may have had. A little about me:- I'm an aspiring scholar so I read a lot and know more about philosophy, history, politics and literature than I'd like. I also have more than a passing interest in cinema and music (of all kinds- Jazz, classical, hip hop, rock, r&B, ghazals and qawwalis). But I am really starved of good in-person conversations. Or just hanging out without a care in the world. If you'd be interested in just talking, venting over drinks or coffee, will you please DM me? I promise I don't bite.

No age range as such but 20-30s roughly? I don’t care if you’re older as long as you’re not boorish :)