u/AureliettaKingsford

My sister and I grew up sharing a house but had completely different relationships with our childhood bedrooms. I (28F, Aurelietta) moved out several years ago, while my sister stayed with our parents until she got married. Last year, my parents decided to downsize and asked if anyone wanted the furniture and belongings from the old house before they sold it. I didn't care about most of it, but there was one thing I really wanted: the small wooden desk my grandfather had built for me when I was twelve. My sister said it was still in our old bedroom and that I could take it whenever I wanted. I planned to pick it up during my next visit, but a few weeks later I found out she'd moved back into my parents' house temporarily while her apartment was being renovated. She had also started using our old bedroom as a nursery because she was expecting her first baby. When I visited, I noticed my grandfather's desk had been painted white and converted into a changing station. I was genuinely upset because nobody had asked me before altering it, especially after my sister had already told me I could have it. I didn't yell or demand that she undo everything immediately. I simply told her that I wished she'd left it alone until I could collect it. She became defensive and said I was treating an old piece of furniture like it mattered more than her baby. I explained that the desk wasn't valuable because of the wood; it was one of the few things I still had that my grandfather had made specifically for me. She said she needed the space more than I needed a sentimental desk and that I should be happy it was being used instead of sitting in storage. My parents think she should have asked first, but they also don't want an argument between us while she's preparing for the baby. My sister offered to buy me a similar desk, but I told her that wasn't really the point. Now she thinks I'm being selfish for making her feel guilty during what should be an exciting time in her life. I feel terrible about that, but I also can't shake the feeling that something meaningful to me was changed without anyone even thinking to ask. AITA?