u/Automatic-Zombie-926

My daughter is 3 YO and 3 months she doesn’t meet any diagnostic criteria but she is not neurotypical.
She is highly verbal not hyperlexic , full back and forth conversation since 2,5 , always been aware of social cues , rule follower never had a meltdown and tantrums are extremely rare ( once a month ) she always takes “ no” in her stride and she is flexible in her playing and socialising with other kids , also with changes in routine . She is very good at focusing on all sort of tasks the ones she enjoys and the non stimulating ones , she is very low energy and high need sleep baby , good eater and very empathetic since she was 2 always makes sure other people around her are happy , can follow structure and instructions and always well behaved outside , plays well with other kids especially 1:1 interactions following the other kid’s lead like sharing a puzzle together , playing hide and seek etc

But she also

1. gets overwhelmed in busy environments but not in playgroups or playgrounds ( it is situational ) . She shakes and says “ mommy please can we go home “ but totally fine in some busy restaurants , she sits and eats and colors .
2. she talks a lot
3. She is very in tune with others feelings
4. Asks philosophical and deep questions
5. Lots of worries for her small mind
6. 5 she has huge separation anxiety and always needs us close

She is that sort of kid who would say “ mommy can we go and watch the world go by “ rather than being in a chaotic environment. I wouldn’t say she is shy , she loves going up to people at the park singing her songs to them or showing them her toys . She asks “ mommy can I say hi to the lady “ kind of questions

Now , I know lots of you will point at neurodivergence but those traits don’t meet any diagnostic criteria ( already been through a private and nhs assessment done by a neuropsychiatrist and there is nothing I can do at this stage ) .

my main concern is preschool and school in general . I asked around and lots of parents , regardless of an EHCP , are struggling to keep work and keep their ND anxious kids in school due to lack of funding and staff or simply support .

there is no way I can homeschool her or give up my job ( not that I don’t want to but it is a really a matter of keeping a roof over her head or not )

Did you have a similar kid and how did he / she turned out , what was the school like ?

My daughter is 3 YO and 3 months she doesn’t meet any diagnostic criteria but she is not neurotypical.
She is highly verbal not hyperlexic , full back and forth conversation since 2,5 , always been aware of social cues , rule follower never had a meltdown and tantrums are extremely rare ( once a month ) she always takes “ no” in her stride and she is flexible in her playing and socialising with other kids , also with changes in routine . She is very good at focusing on all sort of tasks the ones she enjoys and the non stimulating ones , she is very low energy and high need sleep baby , good eater and very empathetic since she was 2 always makes sure other people around her are happy , can follow structure and instructions and always well behaved outside , plays well with other kids especially 1:1 interactions following the other kid’s lead like sharing a puzzle together , playing hide and seek etc

But she also

1. gets overwhelmed in busy environments but not in playgroups or playgrounds ( it is situational ) . She shakes and says “ mommy please can we go home “ but totally fine in some busy restaurants , she sits and eats and colors .
2. she talks a lot
3. She is very in tune with others feelings
4. Asks philosophical and deep questions
5. Lots of worries for her small mind
6. 5 she has huge separation anxiety and always needs us close

She is that sort of kid who would say “ mommy can we go and watch the world go by “ rather than being in a chaotic environment. I wouldn’t say she is shy , she loves going up to people at the park singing her songs to them or showing them her toys . She asks “ mommy can I say hi to the lady “ kind of questions

Now , I know lots of you will point at neurodivergence but those traits don’t meet any diagnostic criteria ( already been through a private and nhs assessment done by a neuropsychiatrist and there is nothing I can do at this stage ) .

Did you have a similar kid and how did he / she turned out ?