Dumper reacting badly, insight welcome
Hey everyone. I broke up with my girlfriend of 3 years about a month ago after feeling very unhappy in our relationship, mostly feeling lack of genuine attraction and attachment.
In the first couple weeks, I felt alright, and we were on decently good terms. She'd reached out to my family to say she appreciated them and I did the same, and we worked out our logistical things civilly.
But a couple days ago she texted me to say she wants to go no contact (a week from then, after we worked out our logistics) in order to move on with her life, and it made me suddenly very fearful of a future without her. I began idealizing our relationship to myself and suddenly felt I wanted her back. I began to text asking to talk, and she politely but firmly told me to stop. I really should have, but I continued because I wanted her to know that I wanted to reconcile. She hasn't responded, and I know I need to just leave it here.
I think what happened was that I was feeling surprisingly good and managing the grief well until I felt the gravity of the loss, I suppose after her no-contact request. I reacted impulsively and disrespected her boundaries. I'm pretty sure apologizing will make it worse. I just wanted to share this and ask if anyone else has been in a similar situation, and how you navigated it. Obviously all of our stories are different, but I suppose I am looking for general ideas about how to process sudden regret and feelings of wanting to get back together while respecting someone's space.