u/BeginningGlad5266

Hey Reddit, I need some outside perspective on a complicated situation.

So, my girlfriend and I are both 18. We met about 2 years ago and started talking before eventually getting together. Early in the relationship, I cheated on her  and it didn't stop there. I ended up getting involved with some of her friends too. When she found out, we broke up, and we stayed broken up for about a year and a half.

About 2 months ago, we got back together. And it feels completely different this time. The first relationship was childish  we barely even held hands. This one is real. We say "I love you," we call each other, we're actually building something.

But her trust in me isn't fully there, which is understandable given what I did. And on top of that, I'm her first real relationship  she's not the type to mess around with guys carelessly, so I know what we have means something to her, even if she struggles to show it the way I do.

Here's where it gets complicated: she's proposed that we put things on pause not just for exams, but for the entire duration of our studies. That could be years. She'd still want the calls, the "I love yous," all of it  just no label, so she doesn't have to constantly overthink things. She's not being dramatic or playing games, this comes from a genuine place. She's just scared, because I'm her first and she doesn't take this stuff lightly.

After the bac, we go our separate ways anyway she stays in Morocco, I move to France for university. So long distance was always going to be the reality.

What's really weighing on me:

• I've cried over her. She's never cried over me, not even after our original breakup.
• She told me recently that she detaches from people easily and would probably recover from a breakup within a month. That really hurt to hear.
• She has this hold on me that's hard to explain she can make or break my entire day.
• I'm terrified that once I'm alone in France, isolated, I'll completely fall apart.
• The Final Exam is in 3 weeks and I can barely think straight as it is.

Letting go is not an option for me. I genuinely believe she's the woman of my life. But the idea of being in this in-between situation not together, not broken up for years, while living in different countries, while she's uncertain and I'm all in... I don't know if I can handle that.

Has anyone been in something like this? How do you hold on to something real when the timing and distance are completely against you and when you're not even sure the other person is as invested as you are?

Hey Reddit, I need some outside perspective on a complicated situation.

So, my girlfriend and I are both 18. We met about 2 years ago and started talking before eventually getting together. Early in the relationship, I cheated on her  and it didn't stop there. I ended up getting involved with some of her friends too. When she found out, we broke up, and we stayed broken up for about a year and a half.

About 2 months ago, we got back together. And it feels completely different this time. The first relationship was childish  we barely even held hands. This one is real. We say "I love you," we call each other, we're actually building something.

But her trust in me isn't fully there, which is understandable given what I did. And on top of that, I'm her first real relationship  she's not the type to mess around with guys carelessly, so I know what we have means something to her, even if she struggles to show it the way I do.

Here's where it gets complicated: she's proposed that we put things on pause not just for exams, but for the entire duration of our studies. That could be years. She'd still want the calls, the "I love yous," all of it  just no label, so she doesn't have to constantly overthink things. She's not being dramatic or playing games, this comes from a genuine place. She's just scared, because I'm her first and she doesn't take this stuff lightly.

After the bac, we go our separate ways anyway she stays in Morocco, I move to France for university. So long distance was always going to be the reality.

What's really weighing on me:

• I've cried over her. She's never cried over me, not even after our original breakup.
• She told me recently that she detaches from people easily and would probably recover from a breakup within a month. That really hurt to hear.
• She has this hold on me that's hard to explain she can make or break my entire day.
• I'm terrified that once I'm alone in France, isolated, I'll completely fall apart.
• The Final Exam is in 3 weeks and I can barely think straight as it is.

Letting go is not an option for me. I genuinely believe she's the woman of my life. But the idea of being in this in-between situation not together, not broken up for years, while living in different countries, while she's uncertain and I'm all in... I don't know if I can handle that.

Has anyone been in something like this? How do you hold on to something real when the timing and distance are completely against you and when you're not even sure the other person is as invested as you are?