u/BeingBetter04

48 days later....

I can finally say I didn't deserve the way you were treating me.

At the end of it all I was terrified of you. You threw things at I shut down and couldn't say a word. The gallon jug came at me as I shouted "Stop! Stop throwing things at me!" As the jug almost hit me you yelled "I'm not throwing anything!"

You called me a liar. You made me feel crazy. I began therapy a month before this happened because you were yelling as I was crying and you were punching the bed. It was so loud a neighbor girl called the property manager to report domestic violence and the property manager talked to me the next day asking how I was and I said "oh I'm fine. Thank you." And she said there was a report and if you were hurting me. I said "Oh no. Just an argument."

It wasn't an argument. It was me doing my checklist of chores everyday after my full time job so you could come home and eat and play the game. After a while I could always tell and prepare myself for when something wasn't good enough. Usually "I have no work clothes that are clean" even though you threw your clothes everywhere and I couldn't tell what was clean and what was dirty. After spending $30 a week on just your clothes to be washed, I never had money. I always bought the groceries, washed the clothes, bought gifts for any birthdays and everything else. I was yelled at and belittled for Christmas. I was belittled for not saying thank you for the flowers and gifts you got me for Valentine's Day even though I was smiling from ear to ear and gave you a kiss and a hug because we agreed on no gifts.

Maybe I am the bad guy. Maybe I am. But honestly as much as this sucks and as much as I miss you and as much as I feel fucked up for still loving you. I am not happy. I smile every single day. The 1 day I wasn't my friend asked me immediately if I was okay before I even noticed. 1 day out of 48 days. That's pretty good. I finished therapy. She keeps saying I made the right choice. Everyone does.

If I made the right choice and I know I did, why do I still defend you? Why do I still love you?

I hate myself for all of this because I know the story you're telling people. I'm crazy and I did nothing for the apartment and I'm lazy. That I lied about you throwing things even though the property manager said "He told me 'Yeah I threw things towards her'." I have never felt so betrayed in my life knowing the person I sacrificed everything for intentionally did a violent act towards me. The way I am living now, everything is clean. My pets are happy and thriving unlike before. Mentally I am free. Windows are open and light shines in through the windows.

I miss you but I don't.

I love you but sometimes I just wish I'd stop loving you.

Have a good life.

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u/BeingBetter04 — 4 days ago

You Did This Not Me

You deserve to know you caused me nightmares. You deserve to know I never lied and I always fought for us while you belittled me and told me the cruelest things that still play in my head. You didn't want to buy me flowers. You didn't want me to go to the gym with you. You were incapable of helping me by rinsing your dishes, putting your dirty clothes in the hamper or even putting trash in the trash can. You deserve to know I am so afraid of you that I still defend you when people talk shit about you. I genuinely wish I hated you.

You made me feel small and worthless. You punched the bed, you threw things at the wall within a foot of me, and you hated me. You blamed me for telling one person how you threw things. You took my dog from me. You took my strength from me. You took any ounce of strength I had. You implied I was stupid. You made fun of my intelligence. You couldn't even take the trash out. Living with you was always unbearable. Life with you was so unbearable that I went to 3 different therapists. I just want to feel like me again.

reddit.com
u/BeingBetter04 — 1 month ago

I think I've posted on here before. My ex and I broke up 12 hours after I got home from being gone (very unexpectedly) for 2 weeks at my parents. He threw laundry softener, detergent and scent beads in my direction.

I talked to the property manager because he is making things complicated for me to get the last of my things. I have a snake, a tall plant shelf and a few other things to get. He messaged me earlier saying I lied about him throwing things directly at me. I corrected him saying I told the property manager that he "tossed" 3 objects onto the bed and they hit the wall and him tossing those things scared me. That is exactly what I told her. I spoke with her (the property manager) and she said he told her "I threw laundry detergent towards her". That is completely different from what I said but it is the truth.

Honestly I've been having nightmares all week about what he did. It may not be as scary or dangerous as other people's experiences but he threw a gallon jug of fabric softener at me while I was on the floor crying. I haven't been able to get more than 5 hours of sleep a night. I am terrified. I am 4'11" and he is 5'8" and he was in the military and lifts weights everyday as he wants to have to upper body of a body builder. I am absolutely terrified.

He tried to lie saying I said something different and telling me how I am making him look bad. I have no sympathy knowing that he told her that he threw things towards me. I am almost home free. This is a very sad and traumatizing experience for me but I am almost done! I am moving 1 hour away from him and closer to my family!

u/BeingBetter04 — 1 month ago