u/BestLoveJA

I’m 42, single, and mentally preparing for an explant + lift after having implants for 20 years... but I’m terrified of scars from the lift.

I keep looking for pics online (and on this sub), and most of the ones I see are either right after surgery or only 2-3 months post-op, when the scars are still noticeable. I know healing takes time, but it’s making me panic since I’ve never seen “fully healed” pics.

I still want to date (and get married)… and feel beautiful naked, feminine, and confident in my body. But I won’t with monster scars on my boobs! 😔

Are there any women here who had an explant + lift, fully healed, and are happy with how their breasts look fully healed?

If anyone feels comfortable sharing success stories or healed photos, I would appreciate it more than you know. I really need some hope and reassurance right now. 🩵🙏🏼

I started smoking regularly around age 30 and I’m 42 now. Not long after I started, I started getting really bad night sweats. I genuinely thought I was going through early menopause. I never put two and two together that it might be from the marijuana.

I even emailed my doctor a picture of my drenched bedsheets one night and asked for hormonal bloodwork because I was convinced something was wrong! Mind you, I was only 30 years old at that time. 😂

But all my blood/hormone levels came back normal, I was still getting my periods every month… yet nobody could figure out what was causing the night sweats.

Some nights were severe! I was scared to sleep in the same bed with my ex! 😅

Now I’m on day 30 of quitting, and I just realized… my night sweats are basically gone. Even around my period, which used to be the worst sweating. I still get hot (memory foam mattress), but I don’t wake up soaking wet.

I don’t want to jinx myself, but I honestly think it was the weed causing night sweats all along.

Just wanted to post this in case there are other ladies in here panicking thinking they’re suddenly in perimenopause after becoming regular smokers. Everyone is different, but for me, quitting made a HUGE difference.

Hope this helps other women quit for good!! 🩵

I’ve had my saline implants for 25 years, and one recently ruptured. I originally thought I was going to explant and be done with implants completely, but now I’m reconsidering replacement instead.

I’m feeling really conflicted because part of me still loves having curves and feeling feminine/sexy with implants. A close longtime male friend also told me he thinks I’d regret removing them entirely because this is the body I’ve had for so long.

What I’m really trying to understand is this:

For those of you who replaced your implants after having them for a long time (especially 15–25+ years), how did it go? Did you have any complications from the replacement surgery itself? Any regrets, health issues, capsular contracture, implant illness symptoms, repeat ruptures, etc.?

Or was the replacement process relatively smooth and worth it for you?

I’ve been emotionally all over the place trying to decide what to do, and hearing real experiences would really help. 🩵😔🙏🏼

I’ve had saline implants for 25 years, and one recently ruptured. Before that happened, I had already started emotionally preparing myself for explant surgery. I grieved the idea of losing them and had come to peace with the thought of living naturally again.

Part of me feels like removing them could be freeing… physically, mentally, and emotionally. I’ve dealt with things like brain fog, headaches, unexplained anxiety, and I wonder if I might feel healthier without implants. On a deeper level, I also thought maybe I’d become more protective of my body, less sexualized, and maybe someday find someone who loves me for me, not because I have big boobs (especially after recently going through a tough break up). I’m a 34D right now.

But recently I opened up to a longtime male friend I’ve known for 20 years, like a brother to me, and his reaction completely threw me off. He told me he thinks I should replace them instead of removing them. He said this is the body he’s always known me with, and he thinks I’ll struggle emotionally if I remove them and become flat. He also said he knows several women who replaced theirs and were perfectly happy afterward.

Now I feel completely torn. Part of me still wants to feel feminine, sexy, curvy, and voluptuous. But another part of me wants freedom and peace.
I honestly don’t know what to do anymore. I’ve been crying almost every day over this decision. I’ve already been living with a rupture for 2 months, and I know I need to decide soon.

For those who explanted after many years… especially if you loved your implants before, how do you feel about your body now? Do you still feel confident, feminine and sexy?

Before dating my ex, I had never even heard the term “aromantic.” From what I learned, it means someone who can enjoy sex and companionship, but doesn’t develop long-term loving feelings/attachments toward people.

My ex strongly identified with that label. He’s also been a very heavy weed smoker for over 25 years (he’s 45 now).

At first, I misunderstood what he meant by “aromantic” since he never explained it and I was upfront with what I wanted (a true loving relationship). I thought he just wasn’t actively looking for relationships, but if love happened naturally, he’d be open to it. I related to that because when I was smoking regularly myself (not nearly as heavily as him), I noticed I became emotionally lazy when it came to dating. I’d cancel dates, avoid putting effort into relationships, or honestly just prefer getting high after work over emotionally investing in someone.

Now we’ve broken up after 5 months together, largely because he truly is not capable of loving/longterm attachment, and I’m currently on day 30 without weed.

Quitting has made me reflect on how much marijuana affected my dating life over the years too. I feel like I spent years emotionally numb, unmotivated to connect deeply, and disconnected from the idea of building a future with someone.

Has anyone else here experienced this?

Did heavy weed use affect your ability or desire to date, fall in love, maintain relationships, or develop deeper emotional attachment? Do you identify as “aromantic”?

I’m not trying to make excuses for him, but I genuinely felt his heart so I’m wondering if marijuana is to blame

I’m on day 17 after 12 years of smoking, and I needed someone to talk to about the past few days. I literally have no one else to talk to, who truly understands, in such detail about quitting. (Long read)

This weekend was tough. I (39f) was helping a stray cat… and it bit me. Ended up in urgent care, and started antibiotics that are making me feel gross.

As I got home from urgent care, my ex (40m) reached out after 2 months of no contact, and the interaction was not good. It just confirmed how selfish and unempathetic he is. I completely lost it and went off on him over text, something I’ve never done before. I was always patient with him. I felt embarrassed afterwards. I cried all weekend. 🥺

Now here I am, Tuesday night, still crying over my ex, feeling weird from the antibiotics, feeling overwhelmed, and that’s when it hit me:

“I need weed. This is too much. This isn’t the right time to quit. It’s the ONLY thing that could help me stop crying and just breathe”.

On my drive home from work, I actually called my local dispensary and asked for the lowest THC preroll they had. They said 9%. I told them to hold it for me. I’ll be there in 10 minutes.

The whole drive there, I was battling myself.

One voice: “This will help you. You need relief.”

The other: “If you do this, you’re back at square one.”

I pulled into the dispensary parking lot. Opened my car door. And I sat there.

Out loud, I said to myself:

“I can’t let my ex win and throw away 17 days… but I need to smoke to calm down… but I also need to love myself. I love my mom more than him. I love my future more than him. I shouldn’t smoke.”

Right then, my aunt (who’s like a second mom to me) called me out of nowhere.

After we hung up, I cried again… started my car… and drove away without going into the dispensary.

It was extremely difficult. One of the hardest moments so far. A real test of my willpower. 😩🥺

I know smoking would help temporarily. But I also know I would’ve reset all my hard work the past 17 days.

I didn’t relapse tonight.

But damn, this has been a tough couple of months since the breakup and the marijuana withdrawal symptoms.

I’m wondering if my brain is permanently damaged and if I could ever overcome this break up. 😔

Thank you for hearing me out. 🩵

Praying I could continue to stay strong.