10 years in Australia, love the people, but struggling with work culture and making actual friends
Hi everyone,
I’ve been living in Australia for 10 years now. Overall, I’ve met really nice, polite, and friendly people here. However, after a decade, I still haven’t been able to make any genuine Aussie friends.
Lately, my office environment has been making me feel incredibly isolated and anxious, and I wanted to see if anyone else has experienced this or has advice.
I work in an office, and I still cannot get over the workplace culture of gossip and confrontation avoidance. My colleagues will heavily complain about someone behind their back, and then two minutes later, they are chatting and laughing with that exact same person face-to-face like nothing happened. It is exhausting to witness, and it honestly makes me paranoid. If they do it to everyone else, I assume they do the exact same thing to me the moment I walk out of the room.
The vibe is just draining. For context, my immediate team is split:
- Two younger coworkers who just chat all day and barely get any work done.
- Two older coworkers who are much nicer to me, but they constantly bad-mouth each other.
Lately, I’ve caught myself falling into the same trap—constantly complaining just to fit in or vent, and I hate that I’m absorbing that negative energy. It’s exhausting to care this much and be surrounded by this kind of double standard.
Is this a common corporate culture thing here, or did I just get unlucky with my workplace? And for those who have been here long-term, how on earth do you break past the "office friendly" barrier to make real Aussie friends outside of work?
Would love to hear your thoughts or similar stories. Thanks!