Mine are:
Cupcakes: just overly sweet crumbly colourful expensive muffins
Burrata and stracciatella: tasteless creamy mozzarella. Without oil, seasonings and other flavours they are useless.
Kale: tasteless, annoying texture, just a veg filler. No need to charge me a fortune
I've just realised I've never followed up on my story.
https://www.reddit.com/r/coworkerstories/s/rbODZHo2Z7
TLDR Mark has been coming up with absurd stories to get away with getting reprimanded about his performance or avoid working during busy periods. Him getting married, gf miscarriage, father getting heart attack, him getting mugged. Then he showed up one day in tears saying his cancer ridden mother had passed and I wasn't sure whether to believe him at the time.
So, after doing some thoughrogh investigation on social media and obituary sites I found out that Mark was indeed lying. Evidence showed him, on the day when the funeral was meant to happen, happily dancing and singing in a pub with family and friends and then taking a family trip on the west coast. Loads pics and videos of him smiling and everyone else having a blast. Not a funeral vibe, really.
On his return, we confronted Mark who after some initial denial admitted about lying.
Mark had no choice but to leave the company. When I spoke to him privately, I told him that his lying was going to cause him serious problems if he carried on.
A few days later he asked me to give him references for a new role. I told him best not to. He still went ahead and gave his recruiter my contacts. I made the recruiter read between the lines without being blatant about Mark. He didn't get the job.
It's been 4 years, I haven't heard from him since.