u/BorkBork97

I might need to file for chapter 7.

Part of this would be my car being taken. I pay 608/month at 14% apr on a now 5 year loan. That’s the main reason I want to declair. I’m going to try to get a refinance because I really don’t want to have to file before my 29th birthday.

My car was hit, and I owe a 2k deductible and have already paid 1076 for the rental.

I have 5700$ to my name. I don’t feel like I’ll be able to refinance and I’ll be paying it off forever.

My step dad says to get a jeep, put 5k down, and then declare. I don’t feel like that’s gonna fly. I also am getting our dog that we’ve been prepping for for a yea in early June. I owe 1108 on her. We’ve been watching her grow and waiting for her, I can’t not get her. I know how that sounds please don’t come at me. But I’m scared they’ll take her.

I have CC debt and it would be nice to have it wiped but really it’s the car. I wish I could just sell it but I’d still owe like 10k.

I don’t know what to do. I just had to quit my second job. These repairs and the rental are screwing me. Idk what to do. Like do I file? Do I not file? I know people swear up and down my dogs won’t be taken. Last tax season I made like 40-42k.

Also what’s the deal with filing chapter 13? I’d be willing to do that as well, I am also married and my husband and makes about the same

At my wits end and I need to know what to do

I’m about to be 29. I have about 5k (maybe more) of CC debt. My car payment is horrible—608$/mo with a 14% APR on a 6 year (now 5 year) loan. The negative equity rolled over into the loan (23k) was like 9k. I can’t do it anymore. I also have like, thousands of dollars of medical debt I don’t even know how to track down.

The last straw is someone crashed into me while I was parked. My deductible is 2k, I’ll owe 1800$ as a medical copay and I’m paying 51$/day for a rental. I don’t even want the goddamn car anymore.

For a while I’ve been considering filing. My credit is already awful. My only thing is I get FAFSA for student loans. I dont want to wipe my loan debt. I am worried that filing would affect my ability to get federal aid. I don’t even expect to get private loans for school because my credit is so bad.

Is it possible to file and not have my FAFSA affected? I need to finish school. Where do i even start if I need to?

I have like around 7k. I’m gonna have to use a good portion for these repairs. I have to use 1108 to pay off something important. I think I’d use the rest to get a cheaper car outright, if I could. I need a reliable car though. Idk what to do what do I do.

The lady I spoke to said that she never sees them take dogs, but I don’t want to risk that AT ALL. Or where I live (rent).

EDIT: there are 3 things I absolutely CANNIT lose—my dogs, my ability to get FAFSA, and the trailer we rent.

I’m about to be 29. I have about 5k (maybe more) of CC debt. My car payment is horrible—608$/mo with a 14% APR on a 6 year (now 5 year) loan. The negative equity rolled over into the loan (23k) was like 9k. I can’t do it anymore. I also have like, thousands of dollars of medical debt I don’t even know how to track down.

The last straw is someone crashed into me while I was parked. My deductible is 2k, I’ll owe 1800$ as a medical copay and I’m paying 51$/day for a rental. I don’t even want the goddamn car anymore.

For a while I’ve been considering filing. My credit is already awful. My only thing is I get FAFSA for student loans. I dont want to wipe my loan debt. I am worried that filing would affect my ability to get federal aid. I don’t even expect to get private loans for school because my credit is so bad.

Is it possible to file and not have my FAFSA affected? I need to finish school. Where do i even start if I need to?

I have like around 7k. I’m gonna have to use a good portion for these repairs. I have to use 1108 to pay off something important. I think I’d use the rest to get a cheaper car outright, if I could. I need a reliable car though. Idk what to do what do I do.

Original Post: [https://www.reddit.com/r/Car\\\_Insurance\\\_Help/s/ypq6hIKy8E\](https://www.reddit.com/r/Car\_Insurance\_Help/s/ypq6hIKy8E)

Location: NJ

NJ law states drivers do not have to pay for each others medical bills. (Important).

Long story short, I was parked in a parking spot, opened my door, getting out, driver quickly pulled into the spot next to me and slammed into my door. Door was bent backwards, wouldn’t close, had to get towed. Coworker was there, didn’t see contact but saw him driving through the parking lot very fast. The force pushed my car forward, knocked me backwards, and I sustained a cervical strain/whiplash.

Progressive (my insurance) says he is 100% at fault. His (Plymouth Rock) says I am. They said that I “created a hazard in a roadway because I said my door was open and stationary and I was getting out of the car.” the police report, they say, says I am at fault. My insurance company says “no; in box 18A they mark a 02, which signifies that the other drivers contribution to the accident was ‘driver in attendance’ while your box is blank meaning there was no contribution on your part.”

The description says i was opening my door as he was parking, but also says “(driver inattention)” next to his label (Driver 1–the other guy).

I’ve had shady lawyers like Lundy Law and Rand Spear ask to take my case. But I understand that in NJ the verbal threshold law states that I have to have a permanent injury and whiplash generally isn’t considered so.

The policy my husband had gotten us is ass. I’m about to pay 1000+ most likely for the rental I have, a 2k deductible, and on top of it, Progressive says that if they can’t get my health insurance to cover the hospital bills that I need to make them my primary insurer for the accident, and I will be charged a 1k deductible and 800$ copay, because I guess our policy limit, being 50k, has that deductible and copay.

I am screwed. I feel so stuck and hopeless. I was just getting out of my car to go to work. I feel like my only option after hearing about what the subjegation brings is to go to small claims court but he could totally counter sue me and then I would be dead.

Progressive said they would try to reimburse my deductible if they won the subjugation but like I highly doubt that.

I don’t know how the hospital stuff works. I can’t go in a payment plan with anyone else maybe I can with this? Idk if I pay the hospital or what. I am so fucking depressed. The lawyers that handle property damage like this are non contingency. I can’t afford that. Is there anything I can do? Life is so incredibly unfair at this point I wish he’d hit me honestly. Any advice or am I just cooked to shit?

EDIT: forgot to mention that the witness statement my coworker gave to the cop was not in the report and I am going to ask why. She wrote one for me and states she did in fact speak to the officer. I am almost wondering if it is because the man who hit me is apparently a correctional officer. His car was drivable as far as I know.

Original Post: https://www.reddit.com/r/Car_Insurance_Help/s/ypq6hIKy8E

Location: NJ

NJ law states drivers do not have to pay for each others medical bills. (Important).

Long story short, I was parked in a parking spot, opened my door, getting out, driver quickly pulled into the spot next to me and slammed into my door. Door was bent backwards, wouldn’t close, had to get towed. Coworker was there, didn’t see contact but saw him driving through the parking lot very fast. The force pushed my car forward, knocked me backwards, and I sustained a cervical strain/whiplash.

Progressive (my insurance) says he is 100% at fault. His (Plymouth Rock) says I am. They said that I “created a hazard in a roadway because I said my door was open and stationary and I was getting out of the car.” the police report, they say, says I am at fault. My insurance company says “no; in box 18A they mark a 02, which signifies that the other drivers contribution to the accident was ‘driver in attendance’ while your box is blank meaning there was no contribution on your part.”

The description says i was opening my door as he was parking, but also says “(driver inattention)” next to his label (Driver 1–the other guy).

I’ve had shady lawyers like Lundy Law and Rand Spear ask to take my case. But I understand that in NJ the verbal threshold law states that I have to have a permanent injury and whiplash generally isn’t considered so.

The policy my husband had gotten us is ass. I’m about to pay 1000+ most likely for the rental I have, a 2k deductible, and on top of it, Progressive says that if they can’t get my health insurance to cover the hospital bills that I need to make them my primary insurer for the accident, and I will be charged a 1k deductible and 800$ copay, because I guess our policy limit, being 50k, has that deductible and copay.

I am screwed. I feel so stuck and hopeless. I was just getting out of my car to go to work. I feel like my only option after hearing about what the subjegation brings is to go to small claims court but he could totally counter sue me and then I would be dead.

Progressive said they would try to reimburse my deductible if they won the subjugation but like I highly doubt that.

I don’t know how the hospital stuff works. I can’t go in a payment plan with anyone else maybe I can with this? Idk if I pay the hospital or what. I am so fucking depressed. The lawyers that handle property damage like this are non contingency. I can’t afford that. Is there anything I can do? Life is so incredibly unfair at this point I wish he’d hit me honestly. Any advice or am I just cooked to shit?

EDIT: forgot to mention that the witness statement my coworker gave to the cop was not in the report and I am going to ask why. She wrote one for me and states she did in fact speak to the officer. I am almost wondering if it is because the man who hit me is apparently a correctional officer. His car was drivable as far as I know.

Location: NJ

I’m having a panic attack I think I’ve been had

I had a car accident on 5/12. I called a personal injury firm (Rand Spear) because I wanted a **free consultation** to understand my options. Before the consultation, a receptionist sent me paperwork titled “Power of Attorney and Contingent Fee Agreement.” When I asked why I needed to sign it if I only wanted a consultation, I was told it was standard procedure for moving forward and that it applied if they took my case.

I spoke with a paralegal, gave basic information (accident description, witness info, insurance info), but did NOT provide all requested documents or records. The next day they texted asking for more accident information. I did not send it.
About 24–48 hours after the consult, I decided I did not want to pursue legal action or representation. I sent a text, email, and left voicemail saying I appreciated their time but did not want to move forward with services or representation.

The contract contains a clause saying if I discontinue the case or choose another attorney, I may owe costs incurred plus the reasonable value of services at an hourly rate. That scared me.
However, the contract ALSO says something along the lines of: **no attorney-client relationship exists unless/until the agreement is accepted and signed by an authorized representative of the firm.**

I only see my own signature on the document and I was never told directly “we accepted your case” or “we officially represent you.” After signing, they only asked for additional accident information.
I’m trying to understand if withdrawing 29 hours days after what was supposed to be a free consultation mean I am on the hook for paying lawyer fees? Like if that’s the case I feel like I was mislead. They didn’t send anything back signed. What if he signed it and started working on the case already and says “oh well I already started”. I feel so depressed because me getting hit simply getting out of my car is already costing me thousands of dollars I don’t have, and now this when I was just trying to get help.

Location: NJ

I’m losing my mind and my life seems like it’s going to be ruined and I don’t know what to do.

I was parked in a parking spot at my new job. I was in the lines. I looked to see there was no one in the parking spot next to me or pulling in as per habit (obviously as you do when you are making sure that you do not open your door into a parked car or a car trying to park. Just cars driving in the parking lot, you know. I open my door fully, grab my drink and my purse, in what I can only describe as a normal amount of time. I wasn’t taking my time, but I wasn’t scrambling either. It was 8:45am so I was simply getting out of my car.

As I am stepping out, a car rams into my door, pushing my parked car forward, and I fall back into the car from the force and hit my head/neck area, spilling my shit, etc.

The guy gets out and starts screaming at me that I need to watch where I am going and be aware of my surroundings and I am reeling from hitting my head and being jostled around suddenly. One of my new coworkers who is parked in the next spot says from her car “excuse me sir, but you were going \*very\* fast!” And honestly my initial thought after he stopped and I processed what had just happened was that he was going really fast! Like it seemed like he was pulling through one spot to pull into the front one (which he ended up parking in after everything was over and done with).

I called the police, they took a report, the witness gave the exact statement she had said. My car door would not close—the hinge was completely broken and the outside part of my door was crumpled (not like the paint in the outside as if he had swiped the door. Like my door was bent backwards because it was open.) the witness said she thought he had hit me or crushed my leg with how loud and fast the whole thing happened as she saw I was getting out of my car, but did not \*see the crash itself\* as she was also turning to grab her purse to go into work at that exact moment but was incredibly startled by how aloud this was (her words). But she did see him coming in that direction hot, but obviously did not assume that he was swiftly pulling into a parking spot

My car had to get towed. I don’t know what it’s gonna be fixed. My insurance does not cover rentals and I am paying 51$/day. I’ve already spent almost 500$ and this happened Tuesday. My deductible is 2k.

My insurance company (progressive) said to me that they are funding him 100% liable and that “it’s very obvious just from the damages in the photos.” And that they were fairly certain his insurance company (Plymouth Rock) wouldn’t disagree. I filed a claim with both.

Plymouth said to me he claimed that I opened my door in a split second as he was entering the parking spot \*which is absolutely NOT true.\* in the time that I opened the door and proceeded to get out, there is absolutely no way that he was pulling into a parking spot and I just whipped my door wide open. I wouldn’t have had time. He would’ve immediately hit me. But I read that his insurance could say I was creating an obstruction. It sounds like they’d argue I’d be at fault if I opened my door as he was pulling into the parking spot and he scraped it, and that even with my door stationary, it’s still my fault. I don’t understand how you possibly couldn’t see my extended door and have time to stop with the time frame. Like there is absolutely no way unless you were speeding (which it seemed like he was with how fast he flew in and how hard he hit me) or you were absolutely not paying attention. I understand that this is all my perspective, but as I am posting it, I am absolutely certain this is what happened.

His insurance said today they will not be paying for anything regarding my car, deductible, claim, rental, nothing. They found me at fault. Before this I went to urgent care because 24 hours later I was having pretty bad head neck and shoulder pain where I was hit. It got so bad I took way too much ibuprofen because I didn’t want to call out of a job I just started. I went to urgent care and the doctor gave me a neck brace and was insistent I go to the WR because of how much pain I was in. I went, they did a CT scan, and they said I have a cervical strain which I could’ve told anyone. I’ve had whiplash before. It was just really painful this time and everyone was saying that I should get it checked out and it was pretty unbearable at that point.

My insurance is telling me if my health insurance doesn’t cover my hospital bills for this then they can become the primary insurer. But I will be paying a 1k deductible and an 800$ copay. I missed a day of my second job because of the car situation. But I was also in a lot of pain and I work with autistic kids and I just couldn’t continue on to my part time job. I did not express that part though because I didn’t want them to tell me not to come in, because I need the money.

I am incredibly worried about the economic side of this. I am so upset. All I was doing was getting out of my car to go into work, minding my own business. I wasn’t reckless. I wasn’t oblivious to my surroundings. I didn’t just fling my door open, and it wasn’t split second. And I’m pissed because he could have seriously injured me if I had been any further out of my car and I am incredibly lucky that he didn’t crush my leg or pin me to my door. But I am now going to end up paying most likely 4k plus which I don’t have because this happened. The value of my car has gone down. My insurance is going to go up.

I cannot conceptualize how on earth this is my fault or how his insurance company could find me at fault. I am terrified I am not going to be reimbursed for any of this and I don’t have 4k. I don’t even have the 2k to get my car back with the deductible. I can’t finance through any type of credit. Am I wrong here? Like I just don’t understand. What can I possibly do to get these expenses paid for? Im scrambling to figure out what I can possibly do. Do I go to small claims court? If his insurance company is finding me at fault I am scared a judge will too. I just really do not believe that I should be paying anything at all just because I decided to get out of my car. This is going to absolutely ruin me.

I’m losing my mind and my life seems like it’s going to be ruined and I don’t know what to do.

Location: New Jersey

I was parked in a parking spot at my new job. I was in the lines. I looked to see there was no one in the parking spot next to me or pulling in as per habit (obviously as you do when you are making sure that you do not open your door into a parked car or a car trying to park. Just cars driving in the parking lot, you know. I open my door fully, grab my drink and my purse, in what I can only describe as a normal amount of time. I wasn’t taking my time, but I wasn’t scrambling either. It was 8:45am so I was simply getting out of my car.

As I am stepping out, a car rams into my door, pushing my parked car forward, and I fall back into the car from the force and hit my head/neck area, spilling my shit, etc.

The guy gets out and starts screaming at me that I need to watch where I am going and be aware of my surroundings and I am reeling from hitting my head and being jostled around suddenly. One of my new coworkers who is parked in the next spot says from her car “excuse me sir, but you were going \*very\* fast!” And honestly my initial thought after he stopped and I processed what had just happened was that he was going really fast! Like it seemed like he was pulling through one spot to pull into the front one (which he ended up parking in after everything was over and done with).

I called the police, they took a report, the witness gave the exact statement she had said. My car door would not close—the hinge was completely broken and the outside part of my door was crumpled (not like the paint in the outside as if he had swiped the door. Like my door was bent backwards because it was open.) the witness said she thought he had hit me or crushed my leg with how loud and fast the whole thing happened as she saw I was getting out of my car, but did not \*see the crash itself\* as she was also turning to grab her purse to go into work at that exact moment but was incredibly startled by how aloud this was (her words). But she did see him coming in that direction hot, but obviously did not assume that he was swiftly pulling into a parking spot

My car had to get towed. I don’t know what it’s gonna be fixed. My insurance does not cover rentals and I am paying 51$/day. I’ve already spent almost 500$ and this happened Tuesday. My deductible is 2k.

My insurance company (progressive) said to me that they are funding him 100% liable and that “it’s very obvious just from the damages in the photos.” And that they were fairly certain his insurance company (Plymouth Rock) wouldn’t disagree. I filed a claim with both.

Plymouth said to me he claimed that I opened my door in a split second as he was entering the parking spot \*which is absolutely NOT true.\* in the time that I opened the door and proceeded to get out, there is absolutely no way that he was pulling into a parking spot and I just whipped my door wide open. I wouldn’t have had time. He would’ve immediately hit me. But I read that his insurance could say I was creating an obstruction. It sounds like they’d argue I’d be at fault if I opened my door as he was pulling into the parking spot and he scraped it, and that even with my door stationary, it’s still my fault. I don’t understand how you possibly couldn’t see my extended door and have time to stop with the time frame. Like there is absolutely no way unless you were speeding (which it seemed like he was with how fast he flew in and how hard he hit me) or you were absolutely not paying attention. I understand that this is all my perspective, but as I am posting it, I am absolutely certain this is what happened.

His insurance said today they will not be paying for anything regarding my car, deductible, claim, rental, nothing. They found me at fault. Before this I went to urgent care because 24 hours later I was having pretty bad head neck and shoulder pain where I was hit. It got so bad I took way too much ibuprofen because I didn’t want to call out of a job I just started. I went to urgent care and the doctor gave me a neck brace and was insistent I go to the WR because of how much pain I was in. I went, they did a CT scan, and they said I have a cervical strain which I could’ve told anyone. I’ve had whiplash before. It was just really painful this time and everyone was saying that I should get it checked out and it was pretty unbearable at that point.

My insurance is telling me if my health insurance doesn’t cover my hospital bills for this then they can become the primary insurer. But I will be paying a 1k deductible and an 800$ copay. I missed a day of my second job because of the car situation. But I was also in a lot of pain and I work with autistic kids and I just couldn’t continue on to my part time job. I did not express that part though because I didn’t want them to tell me not to come in, because I need the money.

I am incredibly worried about the economic side of this. I am so upset. All I was doing was getting out of my car to go into work, minding my own business. I wasn’t reckless. I wasn’t oblivious to my surroundings. I didn’t just fling my door open, and it wasn’t split second. And I’m pissed because he could have seriously injured me if I had been any further out of my car and I am incredibly lucky that he didn’t crush my leg or pin me to my door. But I am now going to end up paying most likely 4k plus which I don’t have because this happened. The value of my car has gone down. My insurance is going to go up.

I cannot conceptualize how on earth this is my fault or how his insurance company could find me at fault. I am terrified I am not going to be reimbursed for any of this and I don’t have 4k. I don’t even have the 2k to get my car back with the deductible. I can’t finance through any type of credit. Am I wrong here? Like I just don’t understand. What can I possibly do to get these expenses paid for? Im scrambling to figure out what I can possibly do.

I was parked in a parking spot at my new job. I was in the lines. I looked to see there was no one in the parking spot next to me or pulling in as per habit (obviously as you do when you are making sure that you do not open your door into a parked car or a car trying to park. Just cars driving in the parking lot, you know. I open my door fully, grab my drink and my purse, in what I can only describe as a normal amount of time. I wasn’t taking my time, but I wasn’t scrambling either. It was 8:45am so I was simply getting out of my car.

As I am stepping out, a car rams into my door, pushing my parked car forward, and I fall back into the car from the force and hit my head/neck area, spilling my shit, etc.

The guy gets out and starts screaming at me that I need to watch where I am going and be aware of my surroundings and I am reeling from hitting my head and being jostled around suddenly. One of my new coworkers who is parked in the next spot says from her car “excuse me sir, but you were going *very* fast!” And honestly my initial thought after he stopped and I processed what had just happened was that he was going really fast! Like it seemed like he was pulling through one spot to pull into the front one (which he ended up parking in after everything was over and done with).

I called the police, they took a report, the witness gave the exact statement she had said. My car door would not close—the hinge was completely broken and the outside part of my door was crumpled (not like the paint in the outside as if he had swiped the door. Like my door was bent backwards because it was open.) the witness said she thought he had hit me or crushed my leg with how loud and fast the whole thing happened as she saw I was getting out of my car, but did not *see the crash itself* as she was also turning to grab her purse to go into work at that exact moment but was incredibly startled by how aloud this was (her words). But she did see him coming in that direction hot, but obviously did not assume that he was swiftly pulling into a parking spot

My car had to get towed. I don’t know what it’s gonna be fixed. My insurance does not cover rentals and I am paying 51$/day. I’ve already spent almost 500$ and this happened Tuesday. My deductible is 2k.

My insurance company (progressive) said to me that they are funding him 100% liable and that “it’s very obvious just from the damages in the photos.” And that they were fairly certain his insurance company (Plymouth Rock) wouldn’t disagree. I filed a claim with both.

Plymouth said to me he claimed that I opened my door in a split second as he was entering the parking spot *which is absolutely NOT true.* in the time that I opened the door and proceeded to get out, there is absolutely no way that he was pulling into a parking spot and I just whipped my door wide open. I wouldn’t have had time. He would’ve immediately hit me. But I read that his insurance could say I was creating an obstruction. It sounds like they’d argue I’d be at fault if I opened my door as he was pulling into the parking spot and he scraped it, and that even with my door stationary, it’s still my fault. I don’t understand how you possibly couldn’t see my extended door and have time to stop with the time frame. Like there is absolutely no way unless you were speeding (which it seemed like he was with how fast he flew in and how hard he hit me) or you were absolutely not paying attention. I understand that this is all my perspective, but as I am posting it, I am absolutely certain this is what happened.

His insurance said today they will not be paying for anything regarding my car, deductible, claim, rental, nothing. They found me at fault. Before this I went to urgent care because 24 hours later I was having pretty bad head neck and shoulder pain where I was hit. It got so bad I took way too much ibuprofen because I didn’t want to call out of a job I just started. I went to urgent care and the doctor gave me a neck brace and was insistent I go to the WR because of how much pain I was in. I went, they did a CT scan, and they said I have a cervical strain which I could’ve told anyone. I’ve had whiplash before. It was just really painful this time and everyone was saying that I should get it checked out and it was pretty unbearable at that point.

My insurance is telling me if my health insurance doesn’t cover my hospital bills for this then they can become the primary insurer. But I will be paying a 1k deductible and an 800$ copay. I missed a day of my second job because of the car situation. But I was also in a lot of pain and I work with autistic kids and I just couldn’t continue on to my part time job. I did not express that part though because I didn’t want them to tell me not to come in, because I need the money.

I am incredibly worried about the economic side of this. I am so upset. All I was doing was getting out of my car to go into work, minding my own business. I wasn’t reckless. I wasn’t oblivious to my surroundings. I didn’t just fling my door open, and it wasn’t split second. And I’m pissed because he could have seriously injured me if I had been any further out of my car and I am incredibly lucky that he didn’t crush my leg or pin me to my door. But I am now going to end up paying most likely 4k plus which I don’t have because this happened. The value of my car has gone down. My insurance is going to go up.

I cannot conceptualize how on earth this is my fault or how his insurance company could find me at fault. I am terrified I am not going to be reimbursed for any of this and I don’t have 4k. I don’t even have the 2k to get my car back with the deductible. I can’t finance through any type of credit. Am I wrong here? Like I just don’t understand. What can I possibly do to get these expenses paid for? Im scrambling to figure out what I can possibly do.

Disclaimer: everything is 110% my fault I just need to know what to do going forward. Please don’t be mean to me because I’m not feeling really great.

just started as an RBT at a new ABA clinic. I’m with a very behavioral child. Probably the most behavioral I’ve seen. I’ve not even been here for a month and everything is falling apart. Dog needs X-rays. Finals. Dad gets sick, I think he’s gonna be ok, he dies. I work 2 jobs and I’m not sleeping. Needless to say I am not doing my best at all.

Long story short, I get an email from my boss today saying she’s observed me multiple times not engaging with my client and on my phone. I’ve made it very clear to her that I am doing data and doing my notes on my phone. She explicitly said “if you have all your data done you can even put it into rethink” and if you see the child is occupied do your note. They have iPads, but she also said that I could use the desktop version or the app, which is what I did at my job that I left for this job. Admittedly with the loss of my father I have been taking over funeral preparations, trying to be there for my mother, so there have been times where I have been texting. That is totally and completely my fault. I’ve been trying to hold everything together as best as I can.

I feel like the simple answer here is “get off your phone”. Yes, obviously that’s what I intend to do. I just feel awful that I’ve given this impression. She knows these things and I don’t want to reiterate them as excuses. I feel like I’m going to be sick over this, like I’ve already given such an awful impress such as this that I should be looking for a new job as dramatic as that sounds.

Another issue though that I am worried about is how she and this other BCBA here are viewing my competency. The one BCBA that observes me twice a week said something along the lines of the first ceo/founders/co-creators (I don’t even know) of the BACB was her mentor at Rutgers. When running an oral imitation program in my first week I was nervous and just doing what I had learned from my old clinic, so I ended up running the program with the SDs (do this/open). She corrected me that the SD for an imitation program is “do this” and that “open” is a simple direction program. I thanked her and said that there is a lot of new things I am learning from leaving my old center and that I suppose the BCBAs who had trained us were very lax with the SDs, and that I would do that moving forward.

She then acts like she’s going to get her water and then asks my new boss if there are any continuing education programs for RBTs because “she didn’t even know the SD for an imitation program” and I was shocked. I know every BCBA does things differently. I always ask questions to make sure I am running programs to their specifications. It was a very simple mistake but to go and do that made me very uncomfortable.

The last thing is the other day, my client had a very intense and prolonged behavior. At my old clinic we were expected to handle these along with our BCBAs—provided physical support, get anything they needed, de-escalate, provide the crash pad, etc. my boss took the client to his room and I was trying along with her to block him hitting her, engaging in property destruction, moving the crash pad, and trying my best to put my hand behind his head at all times so he didn’t hurt himself. The next day when it happened again she blocked me and was like “I’m just going to do it” and I was like “oh…okay. Im out here if you need a break or anything”. Same thing with the BCBA. Later she said it was to minimize the attention to the behaviors and she talked about having an open hand when de-escalating. This is the second time she’s said this to me about the hands and she mentioned not gripping at the joints (?) so I asked her “have you seen me do that?” And she said no.

At my old program the BCBAS would act in a similar manner when you f’ed up and then *not* tell you what they actually thought.

Is it me? I feel horrible. I feel like a horrible, incompetent RBT. And I feel like I can’t handle anything in my life right now and I have already messed up this job in a million different ways I didn’t even know possible. Is there anything I can do to fix this? I’m questioning even pursuing being a BCBA anymore.

But I also feel really weak and lame for feeling like I am drowning.

I am in school full time online. I work full time at a clinic with 2-5 year olds (or at least I did—I still do but I just started at a new clinic farther away for more money. I’ve been here for about a month.)

When I was at my old clinic I was barely getting by. I got a second job with a home case. It’s a pretty

I have a pretty sweet deal because I get paid 32/hr, and it’s only 9 hours a week, and the family I have is *lovely*. It’s my first home case. I truly love it there. That being said, 3 days out of the week I am leaving my house at 8am and getting home at 8pm.

I was taking a language class I paid for after work on Mondays and it became too much, I stopped going. When I started this second job I dropped the ball and am about to finish my semester with an F in one of my classes. I was so tired and any scrap of organization I had fell to the wayside.

When I started this new job, everything got worse. I’ve been a mess. My house is a mess. My car is a mess. I’m staying up late because I either can’t sleep, have homework, or I just need some time to myself. And then I’m tired.

And then I have family, friends. Weekends I can’t do anything but vegetate. I am starting Pilates instructor training like every other weekend for about a month and it’s 16hrs over the weekend a ways away in another town near Philadelphia (I live in South Jersey. This place is about an hour away). I actually just rescheduled modules for the fall because it was gonna be every weekend and I’ll crack. We’re also getting a puppy and we have a dog.

My husband is an RBT too. He’s also finishing school but he’s only part time right now.

I would absolutely quit except for 2 things: I feel like I need the extra 500 or so every 2 weeks. And the min is such a sweet person and she really needs help. The child is awesome and so smart and he’s improving.
I would feel so guilty bailing. Like so, so guilty. Horrible.

Another new factor besides the much longer drive to my main job before this second job (I went from a 20 minute drive to work and then literally a 5 minute drive home to my second job, to now a 45 minute drive to my main job, where I am literally running out the door at 3:30pm just to get to my home client a couple minutes late racing there, and then a 20-30 minute drive home.

I feel like I have no time. I know I don’t have any time. I don’t exercise anymore, everything is dirty, I already had terrible sleep now it’s worse, and I can’t possibly stand doing anything over the weekend except playing video games and scrolling. What do I do? My husband is saying quit because the income is only supplement. And like I am not the best RBT I’m sure my home case would faire even better with someone else. And the home case company I work for literally had me come home IN TEARS yesterday—they use CentralReach and they keep telling me my data tables aren’t in EVEN THOUGH I AM PUTTING THEM IN. Like harassing me day in and day out. It’s driving me insane. Trying to have me attend trainings on Saturdays in the morning. I feel like if I don’t quit I’ll get fired. But I’m doing my job as an RBT with the child.

Another factor is at this new job my kid who I have all day is gigantic and is the most physical and behavioral child I have ever had. Like wrestling him all day. It’s horrible. I’ve already had to get surgery from being an RBT due to an injury, I’m praying it doesn’t happen again. I didn’t walk for 2 months last time

I feel like I’m being such a huge baby right now. 50 hours isn’t even that bad. My grandparents came over here from a third world country with no education. My grandpa was a fry cook 7 days a week. Like I can’t even work 49 hours? Am I wrong ir am I justified in feeling beat

This is really hard, coming from a life of overconsumption. I started buying things from EarthHero (household goods/hygenics, etc). I gotta try to find refillable dry food stations (where you bring your mason jars and fill them with nuts, beans, etc).

I am currently trying to gather the necessary materials to create a bee garden to help pollinations, but also to begin to learn how to compost to reduce my waste.

I’m not sure what else I can do! I’m car dependent, what sucks is that ordering goods online take quite a while to arrive. In general I’m not sure really what to do about food and food packaging. I obviously can go to thrift stores if I feel like I need clothing, only wear cotton and linen, I’m already vegan. I just got reusable paper towel replacements, and unfortunately (I’m not sure if this is a good thing or a bad thing) we dont own a washer and dryer, so we get our laundry done once a week, which I think saves water? Is there anything I’m missing? How long does it take to really get into the swing of zero waste?

Newbie! Give me some tips!

Hello gardening community!

I have not gardened before. I used to enjoy caring for many indoor plants. But I would really like to have a bee garden, and I would also like to learn how to compost to feed the garden.

I would need to plant these plants in a raised bed because I live in a rental property. I am planning to plant 4 natives to my state that the bees like; Wild Geranium, White Wood Astor, Blue Wood Astor, and Summersweet.

According to my research, the plan and materials are:

\-Piling some newspaper and cardboard on the spot, wetting it, and then putting my planter on top. I was looking at a Silver 48 in. L x 24 in. W x 12 in. H Raised Garden Bed Kit Metal Planter Box.

\-Putting a mix of raised bed/potting mix in. This would be 70% soil (thinking Miracle-Gro, 5-6 bags of 1.5cu) and 30% compost (Back to Roots Organic Compost, 3 bags of 1cu.)

\-Mix it up, water it, and then plant the Summersweet in the back/center, both the Astors on either side, and the Geranium in front.

Part of the reason I chose these is because unfortunately, the only spot I can plant in is pretty shaded and I read the do well in the shade.

I am planning on getting potted plants and transplanting them in.

\-put down mulch on top of soil but not touching root or leaves of the plant. It was recommended to use 1 bag (2cu) and use a cedar blend.

I’m not sure if this sounds like I’m going in the right direction? The last thing I want to do is get everything and then immediately make a mistake and kill all the plants lol. I really want to make something to help local pollinators and helps to reduce waste by composting!

Give me some Cuyahoga tips!

Husband and myself and our corgi and I are going to CVNP in the beginning of June. These are my thoughts for trails right now:

\~Brandywine Falls

\~Blue Hen Falls

\~Ledges

\~Towpath Trail

We’ll be arriving in June 1st and leaving the 4th.

Are these ok for dogs? We both favor moderate hikes. Any tips? I have bear spray (DONT make fun of me) but like, I’m thinking probably getting bug spray too. We have everything we need basically. But we’ve never been before! So any advice is welcome.

Husband and myself and our corgi and I are going to CVNP in the beginning of June. These are my thoughts for trails right now:

~Brandywine Falls

~Blue Hen Falls

~Ledges

~Towpath Trail

We’ll be arriving in June 1st and leaving the 4th.

Are these ok for dogs? We both favor moderate hikes. Any tips? I have bear spray (DONT make fun of me) but like, I’m thinking probably getting bug spray too. We have everything we need basically. But we’ve never been before! So any advice is welcome.

I’ve gotten reoccurring AWFUL sores as long as I can remember. It’ll be due to trauma, stress, sickness, etc. Usually when one happens, more appear. They are irregular in shape and size. The pain will always radiate into my teeth and it becomes too much to drink water or eat. My lymph nodes under my jaw swell and become tender. They last for about 10 days.

I’ve find so much research. I’ve gotten blood work. I never can find an answer. I don’t believe I have any other symptoms that would indicate an autoimmune issue.

Right now I have 2 and I am just…in incredible pain. As per usual. I wish I could just figure out why. I’m so tired of dealing with this.

Also…I’m seeing things about something called magic mouthwash? Are there things that actually help with the pain of these? I’ve always just dealt with it.