u/Both_Consequence_956

normal color pee.

context: first time working out in 6 years. did 7 sets of bicep curls 20 lbs, with the end being a drop set. most of the sets were to complete failure, with 5-10 min rest in between.

had very jello arms from right after the workout. now its the day after and can barely stretch out my arms, theyre stuck in like 90 degrees. so painful i was almost nauseous. ive had doms before but nothing like this. should i go measure my levels or am i probably fine?

edit: went and got a ck blood test today, will get the results tomorrow

when i was 8 my teacher took me and a couple of other rooms into a dark room for "detention" and had us sat in a circle. he had a blanket over his legs and i saw him quietly moaning, made a groan then told us we could leave. I was very scared at the time but didnt know what was going on, i was mostly blaming myself as i feel i had done something bad to deserve such a serious punishment. I have now later realized what was actually going on.I think it affected me in many ways in terms of mental health, subconsciously..

However, if id tell anyone "i got sexually abused as a kid by my teacher" i feel sort of like a fraud. Mainly because i assume they will imagine something like that i was touched or raped or made to touch them, and give me sympathy as if that was the case. really i thought we were just getting very intense punishment, and was a lot less effected than if i was assaulted

I really liked season 1+2 of love is blind uk and 1+2 of season 1+2 love is blind united states, but then i fell off. which seasons are the best? there are so many to choose from and I just want to see the best ones, wether its drama or fun cast. Am very okay with international seasons even if they dont speak english and needs subtitles.

when i was 8, my teacher took me and 3 other kids to a dark classroom during lunchtime for some made up reason and this was our punishment. He spent time closing the door, im sure he was looking around that other teachers had gone to lunch. he then put a blanket over his legs. i remember seeing the side of his head, quietly moaning. and then a long exhale/grunt which i now suspect was him orgasming. I didnt know what was going on at the time, i thought it was just a weird way of doing detention, but i remember feeling very scared and like something wasnt right.

I realized this just a* year ago. Im 28 and have struggled a lot with mental health throughout my life, severe anxiety at school, depression, later on substance abuse etc. is it possible these are connected even though i didnt know it was sexual in nature at the time? My therapist brushed it off as probably just a false memory, but i very vividly recall these details.

Also, im scared to tell my parents. i feel like this would help give them some context on why i may be struggling, but i also feel like it may traumatize them and cause them to feel guilty for not picking up on it. any help or insight appreciated

I am not looking for medical advice, just to hear some other perspectives of my situation without technical / legal considerations.

I feel guilty for "giving up" and considering applying for disability.

I suspect i have ptsd, but i also have diagnosed adhd, depression and am sober but have struggled with substance use and all types of behavioural addictions from when i was 18 til 28.

I was s** abused by my teacher when i was 8, but i didnt know what was going on and realised just 3 years ago, and suspect it affected all the anxiety and depression i went through from age 9 til now. my memories are very vivid.

I was also falsely accused of a crime i didnt commit at 17 which destroyed me, but i somehow managed to make it to university. There i got a girlfriend who then turned out to be a prostitute, i found out after 4 months of dating.

Later struggled with all kinds of drug addictions. Tried starting school again multiple times but can barely make it out of bed.

I have been living on unemployment which is $1500 a month, in one of the highest cost of living areas in the world. If i go on disability i would get around $3000 which would considerably improve my quality of life. But it also feels like giving up, and i feel guilty for using tax dollars to fund my life.

Again, most days i can barely get out of bed, i have spent 7 years in therapy with no improvement and 3 of those with a really bad therapist, tried a bunch of psych meds, and i am just not improving.

I feel like i am always on the verge of getting my shit together, but ive felt that way for 5 years now and am just not improving.

Does this justify me going on disability, or should i just keep trying.

Edit: If i do regain my health i would defintely want to get a job. I hate staying home and would enjoy the meaning that comes from doing purposeful work.

I have done a couple 2 week fasts but want to try a longer one.

Obviously i will take 3-4g NaCl, 600mg magnesium and 3g potassium.

but i was wondering if i should load up on vitamins / other micronutrients beforehand as to not suffer deficiency during a whole 50 days. Phosphorus? calcium? vit d? iron? something else to take during?

i will be getting an attenuator for it, and planning to play at home and also for some audiences outside as well, mostly hendrix. was wondering how the vertical 2x12 with v30s would compare to a 4x12 with greenback g12h, both inside and outside. Is the sound a lot fuller and better, or will the 2x12 get me 99% there?