u/BranchCurrent4141

I am learning web dev from SMIT and Scrimba. I am also learning UI/UX alongside frontend development from DigiSkills. I have almost completed my frontend journey, but I am still struggling to keep myself focused. I don’t use most social media platforms just to keep myself on track; I only use Reddit. Still, I keep wasting most of my time and procrastinating a lot. I am 21 and still jobless. That adds an extra layer of stress on me.

I am really confused, trying my best to fix my life, but everything seems to be going in vain. Before starting to learn, my main goal was just to land a job, but now I want to build something to show off and flex, mainly with knowledge and skill. The more I dig into this to become knowledgeable, the more I feel like the dumbest person. That makes me think development is not for me, but I have also tried other things in which I failed just because of inconsistency. That is why I don’t want to leave this too and keep repeating my mistakes, then regret my decisions later.

There are a lot of things in the development journey that make me think, “Do I really have to learn all this?” When I start exploring, it just keeps unfolding itself, which makes me exhausted and depressed. My brain starts alerting me that I have to master all of this, but it will take a lot of time, and I also have to cover other things. That makes me feel like my learning pace is too slow, and then there is the pressure of AI too.

I go to college as usual. I’m doing my BSCS from an affiliated college. Our second class was AI.

That class was taken by our mam. She has two subjects with us, and the second class was also hers. After completing her first class, she just sat on the chair and started scrolling Instagram. Meanwhile, the first row students (boys) started sneaking into her Insta, and she knew that and allowed it while asking something from students (I guess). Then one of them said, “mam, yeh wali pic dekhain,” and she angrily replied, “tum kon ho aesy pochny waly,” and the guys just laughed it off.

These same boys keep spoiling the class environment every day, and the teacher does nothing about them. They even joke with mam and sometimes make double-meaning jokes. Mam knows their names and roll numbers but still does nothing about them.

So what happened with me was: two girls went out of the class. I didn’t know if they asked for permission or not. Then my friend and I also stood up to go to the library. Actually, our librarian asked us to install Typing Master on their computer, which I had in my USB. That was the only reason to go out of the class otherwise, I don’t even step out normally.

When we got out of the class in front of mam without permission, she shouted, “idher aaaoooo kis sey poooooch ker jaaaaaa rhy hoooooooo” so loudly that we almost got a heart attack. When we turned to answer her, she again shouted, “abbbb bahir hee rehooooo, classss mai mat anaaaaa.”

So we did what she said. We went to the library, installed Typing Master, and just sat there until it was time to go home.

Later, we got to know from our classmates that she called the CR and marked us absent basically canceled our attendance. Our midterm exams are next week, and she also said that we are not going to give exams for her two subjects.

I literally don’t even speak in her class because she has already punished me twice by making me stand the whole class just because she thought I smiled during her lecture. Meanwhile, those other guys keep laughing in the front row right in front of her, and she does nothing. (jis per zoor chalta hai ussi per chla rhi hain)

She is an STI, meaning she’s not permanent here, and I think she’ll leave after our final exams. She yells all the time in class, and the boys keep making fun of her and provoking her just so they can laugh more.

Even once, the whole class mocked her because she uses ChatGPT to create notes, and it was so obvious. She replied, “itny app scholar ho tuo khud kun nhi bna lety.” In one of her web-engineering class, she said "Frontend development ko client side development bhi kehty hain kun k client khud bhi issy dev4lop ker skta hai"

Now I’m just like, what did we even do that was so bad for her to treat us like this? Meanwhile, those same guys are still her favorites.

The only thing I had to do was say “sorry” and explain the reason why we had to go. But…..

I don’t know what I should do now. She’s temporary, but if I try to fight this, she could easily manipulate the grades and just leave the college, then it will be only me with the bad grades.

I'm so worried now. How should I handle this situation?