u/Broad_Airline_2142

this is like my 5th rant on this sub lol. ive been thinking about detransitioning way more than i have before. im 16,ftm, and i can barely remember how i actually felt when i realized i was transgender(?). ive been having repetitive thoughts of things like "i wish i was a girl so i could feel confident wearing this" and stuff in that genre. i think if i was a cis man thinking that, that would probably be a sign that i was trans; so if im thinking it as a trans man would that be a sign that im not really trans? lately ive been internally referring to myself as two different people because of this. i used to experience crazy dysphoria and jealousy towards other men (could've been horomones or smth) but now its simmered down for some reason? i still feel envy towards men but much milder and its stressing me out. some people have told me to try being a girl for a little to see how it feels, which i think is good advice, but i really dont want to change how everyone knew me. i really hope im actually a man but im terrified that its just teenage stuff tripping me out. advice would be great

idk what flair to use for this but a little less than a year ago i received an open hole flute, its way better than the flute i used before but i had to put plugs in it because i just couldn't make any good sound on it. ive been judged for having weird technique when playing because i dont have my fingers centered on the keys and ive tried to fix it but its so hard 😭 i want to eventually learn how to use this flute normally because i feel immature for needing the plugs on it

im curious why they stopped using these in the more recent ghost files episodes because i thought they were super cool😭

i've started to see a lot of anti trans stuff on my feeds lately and i'm the type of person who believes everything i see. it's caused me to think that i'm just an "insecure women" or that i "get off to being seen as a man" and it really hurts but sometimes i'm worried it's true because it sounds so convincing. i dont know how to ignore or deal with these things and i dont know what to do

i dont think this post makes sense at all but its whatever i just need to get this out. ever since i socially transitioned ftm about 4-5 years ago ive been super depressed. im pretty sure i didn't feel anything like this pre transition and it makes me worry if im really trans or not. i often find myself talking about how isolating it is to be transgender but it has me wondering that if im transitioning to be happy as a man but im not happy at all does that mean transitioning isn't the right path? i really want to live my life as a man but atp id take anything to be cis