u/Brokenintwo34

My daughter is 10 and has always been very intense, perfectionist and has many sensory issues. She often can't cope with everyday things and becomes very unpredictable and aggressive. We're having so many meltdowns and complete refusals to do anything we ask. I'm starting to burn out and we have no support available to us.

I tried to brush her hair today and she punched me twice really hard with very little warning. She then refused to wear socks or shoes threw items at me and my partner in the car and almost hit her younger siblings (2 and 7 months).

She went to bed without brushing her teeth because she was too overwhelmed to do it. It was midnight before she went to sleep because she was stressing about it being too warm in her room (we have ac, a fan, open windows and an ice pack for her). She started panicking about having a stuffy nose (almost nightly issues when she gets upset and it starts running) and screamed at the top of her lungs "My Nose Is Stuffy" for almost an hour. If I ask her to not shout she shouts louder.

I spent the whole evening trying to co-regulate with her and it helped a bit because at least she ate her dinner, but again it wasn't until 10pm after hours of refusal and way past our target bedtime. I had to make myself another meal and have a "noodle party" with her in her bedroom because otherwise she'd have refused to eat, then melted down way worse at bedtime because she "hasn't eaten".

The violence and disregulation got so bad this week I called the local child mental health team (we had hours of her asking to die and head banging/biting herself) and they gave me a website to look at about sensory support and then closed the case the same day, as if I've never researched sensory issues before 🤦🏼‍♀️ I've been trying to get a diagnosis for her or some support since she was two and we can't get her anything.

I also find she's a walking contradiction. I think she has some PDA traits but she needs some amount of boundaries to feel safe and like we're in control. It's heard because I can tell there's a part of her brain that wants the structure and calm but firm parenting, but then she gets overwhelmed she absolutely rebels against any boundary or anything we ask her to do and gets violent or shuts down. I don't know how to balance her needs or even get through the next day with her.

Ant advice would be really appreciated because I'm hanging on by a thread here.

In desperate need of advice!

I've had a long battle with fleas and after months and months of trying to get rid of them without toxins (hoovering daily, DE, washing all bedding, regularly treating the pets, baths, flea combs etc) I've decided to spray the house. I'm terrified for my rubber duckies who are finally thriving (and for my ant farm too).

I have an out building where I plan to store them while I spray the house and a cellar I will move them to after the spray has settled and is no longer airborne (we're not spraying the cellar but there is technically access to the rest of the house so I'm being extra careful. I'm worried about how long they'll have to stay down there as it's toxic to adult fleas for 2 months and stops egg development for up to a year. I don't want them living in our dusty cellar for 12 months but I also obviously want them to be safe.

I have no one who will look after them for me. I've considered a few people but my only option has said they'd probably forget to feed/spray them.

Has anyone else had this issue before? I can't put off spraying any more because I have young kids and despite not having the worst infestation, I saw a flea jump into my spaghetti the other day 🤢💀 they spread disease and nothing else is working.