u/Brondster

Good afternoon hope you are okay.

I'm looking for advice upon what to do with UC.

me and my wife are separating due to differences/grown apart/chronic pain outbursts which are unfair towards her and I'm unsure what I need to do before anything gets rolling.

I have LCW awarded for my health issues which are Disc Degeneration, Sciatica, Chronic Pain and Chronic fatigue- I am in the middle of looking into more diagnosis within the next 3 weeks.

We've had the serious discussions about moving and come to agreement that I sign over the rented tenancy to her as it's a joint tenancy. I don't expect her at all to move out and with our 2 children

On Tuesday morning i'm speaking to our local social housing (who rents us the current address) into looking for me to move out.

At this point do I actually need to mention anything to DWP on the journal?

nothing has been done yet, I don't have any type of valid photo ID as I've looked into any type of property and I know i'm going to need it- I get paid UC on friday so i'll be getting a Provisional drivers license as it's the cheapest form of ID.

I am awaiting mental health support and CBT help for my chronic pain/fatigue

thank you for any help as you can imagine its a tough time, emotional and guilt -ridden

Update - thank you to all for being freshed faced, pointing out my horrible flaws and putting me in the correct path, Pain Management/ therapy and Mindfulness for the 2nd time around it is ❤️

O P Tonight, my wife and I have come to a conclusion that our love for one another has ended. The spark just isn't there anymore....

After 14 years together, she's had enough of me and my moaning and complaining and me flying off the handle because of my chronic pain and chronic fatigue.

We're stuck at a stalemate and unsure what to do next.

My heart says I still want to be with her and fight for it because we get on really well and attracted to her a lot still but my mind says it's unfair to put her through this torture that I suffer from.

My chronic pain and fatigue makes me very irritable and short tempered at least anything around 8 to 10 weeks. This can make my attitude towards her more volatile and I don't know or understand why.

I'm in the middle of getting diagnosis having spent the past 2 years been given the run around by doctors and it's taken its toll on my health which is making me feel worse and being stupid, stubborn and making my wife feel small by having a go at her for not helping enough through the house to which I'm doing too much of and the vicious cycle continues, this is the 3rd or 4th time it's happened since the start of my injury back in February 2023. I've also lost my job of 17 years due to this injury too.

She's brought into our world 2 beautiful daughters which we both love cherish and admire, this pain in going through however is turning me into someone I'm not and she's had enough of it.

There was distance signs as early as a year ago, she doesn't show enough affection, she's always been not a hands on woman but used to do with me but not recently over the past few months.

I tried initiating intimate moments but she's cold , I've tried bringing her out of her comfort zone throughout the 14 years together.

I'd like to know where we go from here ?

I'm heartbroken about it