I’ve been a witch for a while, not much long yet, but as the months go by, the more I relate to this community, in opposition to the firm believers.

One thing I could never wrap my mind around is “spell’s requirements”. There are many believers who firmly believe that intention is not everything, and that you have to use certain ingredients and follow certain guidelines.

It always made me feel alienated from them, because I just can’t believe that a spell works (for external things) without a scientific or logical explanation.
Like yeah, you used that crystal, that plant and that object… alright. So the power is in them, thus, animism? Or are we pleasing a deity?

What about you? What are your experiences with this theme?

(This was inspired by my own personal haircut AND hair coloring situation, lol)

Imagine that you went to your local hairdresser and, instead of your usual cut, they accidentally gave you a hairstyle that you absolutely despise.
You barely can look at yourself in the mirror now. Thanks, barber.

Good, now you’ll have to do something to fix it or simply wait until it grows back again. For some unimportant reason in this scenario, you decide to wait until it’s decent enough by your own metrics.
It varies from person to person, so it could take days, months or even years.

But life doesn’t wait until your hair grows back. You still have to attend school/uni/work, see your loved ones and exist in society.

How can you do that, if your confidence is absolutely wrecked? You can’t force yourself to like your new look, that’s for sure.

Scenario A: The Most Common and Saddest Route

Your absolute hatred for your new haircut makes you feel so bad about yourself that you don’t lose your self-confidence only. Your self-worth is also destroyed.

If you have a partner, you fear they’ll lose attraction to you. If you don’t, you give up on dating for now, as you’re convinced no one will want you this way.

You stop putting nice clothes and accessories, and avoid looking at the mirror. You try to hide as much as you can, from society and from yourself.

Every moment in which you acknowledge your existence is filled with dread and impatience.

Life feels like an annoying waiting room you’re forced to endure everyday, until who-knows-when your hair grows back.

Scenario B: What You Can Do Instead

You hate your current hair, and you know that. But your self-worth is untouched.

If you have a partner, you know they’ll probably either like it or laugh at it with you, and that they love you just the same. If you don’t, you still put yourself out there, cause you know your value and you know someone will see it as well.

Life feels the same, except for this mild annoyance. You still take care of yourself, sometimes hiding your hair because it just doesn’t look good at all, completing ignoring it or even trying to style it a little.

You know you’ll feel better when your hair grows out. But you’re fine for now.

The Purpose of The Analogy

There’s nothing wrong with feeling better in certain ways, like in a certain body shape or size, with certain skills or in a certain career. That’s just being human.

But our goals should not be attached to our self-worth. We don’t need to be fixed to be worthy, we are worthy as we are now.

Goals should serve us, not the opposite.

So please, if you don’t feel good enough as a human being the way you currently are, understand this is a thing to solve internally, not externally. You probably think you’re only good if you have something society values, like being fit or rich.

From experience, spare yourself from the self-hate.

I used to be the kind of person that thought things such as: “once I accomplish this, I’ll finally feel happy all of the time”.
I genuinely thought being far behind my goals was the sole reason for my constant feeling of dullness in my individual daily routine.

“I’m bored? Oh, it must be because I’m still overweight and haven’t mastered the piano yet” kind of thing.
This may sound insane to some of you, but to others, you deeply resonate with the feeling that your current life feels boring, whereas your ideal version’s life seems to be amazing.

But one thing I took too long to learn was the fact that life continues after you achieve your goals.

Obvious information? Indeed.
But not realizing that made me have depressive symptoms for YEARS, so I hope this information helps someone.

You Confuse Dissatisfaction With Your Situation With Your Unhappiness In Life

You can be dissatisfied with something in your life and still have fun in your day-by-day.
Also the opposite: you can be satisfied with your life and have no fun in your day-by-day.

I had both negative feelings in the past, but once I accomplished a major dream of mine, and my routine still felt off, somehow, I looked for other things to fix.

I blamed my weight, my style, my career, anything. And it’s not that I don’t want to improve those areas, because I do.
I just looked for something to blame for the things that were happening inside of me:

Turns out I thought I had to achieve things to be satisfied with my routine now, but that’s not true.
- Things started to feel meaningless without a goal behind.
- Activities stopped being as fun.
- I was slowly losing my hobbies because everything felt pointless to me.

Turns out I focused so much on self-improvement that I forgot that I could have fun without any goal behind.

So please, if you’re reading this, do focus on your goals and achieve whatever the heck you want.

But never forget that life is meant to be lived in whatever way you believe it should, so don’t think having fun (by your own definitions of leisure activities) is a waste of time.

Your current self deserves to enjoy life as much as your desired self does.

Make your days enjoyable.

I’ve known and studied MBTI for six years, but I ended up acquiring lots of noise in my knowledge of this system.

Due to that, I still have trouble typing myself or others when they show multiple consistent traits of different opposing functions. I believe that’s due to all of the stereotypes and misinformation I’ve acquired during the years.

Can someone provide me an accurate description of each function and how the stack works, please?