r/mbti

When I text an ENFP, I am assaulted by a barrage of crying faces, laughing faces, and fluffy animals. Why?

Hey! I'm a student who's really curious about psychology. I go extremely deep into all the research, human biases and so on.

What I found, and for me it was shocking: MBTI is not really reliable as a psychology test.

It was created by a mom and daughter to find out about the daughter's boyfriend, and heavily used for women during the war for specialities. They were not psychologists (I honestly don't remember exactly, but when I read an academic book it was clearly stated).

For me it was genuinely shocking cuz most people take it and it's quite popular.

Later I found out that MBTI is only for self-reflection, not reliable for recruitment (recommended by MBTI company). I went deeper and asked like why??

Well, that's because most people are not either of the 2 types. They can be in between, and most people are.

Same as I noticed with myself. I don't consider myself either introvert or extravert, it purely depends on the situation.

I was sitting in the room, it was about 11pm, and I was like 0_0.

I read another book the next day, it stated about Big Five, which is a more reliable and science-backed approach for personality.

There are a bunch of free tests to understand yourself better, so I'm clearly switching my opinion about MBTI (sorry...)

I also found one funny test which seems also backed by Big Five, although fewer questions (idk really if it's reliable) but still funny.

I’m curious about this from an MBTI/cognitive-function perspective, but not in the usual “which type is best at math?” way. I’m more curious about how different people mentally get to the answer.

If cognitive functions are supposed to reflect different ways we take in, organize, filter, and make decisions from information, math seems like an interesting place to actually compare that. The problem itself might be the same, but the way two people mentally represent it, decide what matters, recognize a pattern, or get to the solution could be completely different.

If you’re good at math, why do you think you’re good at it? What exactly clicks for you? When you read a word problem, how do you know what matters? Do you picture what’s happening, label the important parts, recognize the relationship and ignore the rest? Or does it happen so intuitively that you don’t really know how you knew what to do?

Do you need to understand the bigger system first before the smaller details make sense, or are you comfortable learning individual rules and connecting them later?

I also wonder how much information gets compressed with experience. Something like “distance divided by time” can contain a lot of concepts and relationships, but someone experienced might just recognize the whole thing as rate without consciously unpacking any of it. Does math feel like that to you? Like larger chunks or patterns rather than a bunch of individual steps?

Do you visualize mathematical relationships spatially at all? Like positions, shapes, movement, levels, or some kind of mental diagram? Or is your thinking mostly symbolic/verbal?

How much does memory play into being good at math for you? Do formulas and concepts stick easily, or do you have to reconstruct why something works before you can use it again?

Do you tend to understand abstract math first and then recognize that same pattern somewhere in reality, or are you more likely to look at something happening in reality and figure out how to represent it mathematically?

If the same mathematical pattern appears in two completely different things, does that connection feel meaningful to you, or do you just see it as the same structure showing up in two places?

And what actually makes math enjoyable? Is there novelty in it? Is it the puzzle? The precision? Pattern recognition? Or is the satisfying part just that moment where you suddenly see through the problem and everything clicks?

I’m basically curious whether what we call being “good at math” hides a bunch of different cognitive processes that some people have already compressed so well that they don’t even notice themselves doing them.

So tell me your MBTI, your relationship with math, and what you think your brain is actually doing when math feels intuitive to you? Or, if math feels completely foreign to you, where does that feeling start? What are your biggest struggles or questions about math that you’ve never felt were properly answered?

I didn't know much about MBTI for a long time, other than the basic idea of introverts and extroverts. But around 4–5 months ago, I started looking into MBTI more, and it started to make a lot of sense to me when I thought about the people around me and myself. Then I realized that I was starting to take it a little too seriously.

I kept reading and learning more about it, but now I can't stop thinking about whether someone is an N type or an S type, etc. I find myself doing this all the time. It's not like I'm consciously trying to analyze everyone, but these thoughts just keep flowing through my head.

I know MBTI can give you some useful insights and can make sense of certain aspects of people's personalities. But I also know that it can't fully explain a person and that people are much more complex than a personality system like this. I keep telling myself that, but I still find myself thinking about MBTI all the time.

What do you guys think about this? Have any of you experienced something similar? And do you have any advice for me?

most prominent examples are Sakura, Orihime Inoue, Katara, Starfire

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I’m an INFP 6w5. I hate when people assume I should always be sweet and nice. If someone attacks me, I attack back.

I don’t like poetry.

I don’t care for nature too much because I don’t wanna run into wild animals or bugs.

Edit: On and apparently I’m not supposed to like any ESTPs because I’m an INFP 😂 I work a job where there’s a lot of ESTx types present. God forbid I get along with people at work. Oh and God forbid I appreciate their confidence, straightforwardness, and risk taking bravery.

Why can’t some people fathom that your mbti type does not represent mental illness, personal triggers, or determine your external behaviors? Someone’s entire life and what people have been through also play a factor in one’s personality type. It’s your preference and your cognitive functions. That does not mean you will live by it. I’m a 6w5 I will never act like my true self in front of strangers because it doesn’t feel safe enough for me. I don’t trust a soul (sad I know). I have to get really comfortable and safe in order to be who I truly am to the core. To say someone of each mbti is exactly the same is so insane to me. I’ve met so many other INFPs, we don’t all act the same. I think it is so absurd that some people truly have this mindset.

What stereotypes do you hate about your type? Or what assumptions do you hate?

I feel like this happens to me all the time as an INFP. If someone has an opinion, I don’t automatically agree just because we’re friends. I like to think for myself and use my own values to form my opinions. When I share a different perspective, it’s usually because I care and want to help, not because I’m trying to oppose them.

I don’t feel the need to pick a side, and always agreeing with someone just because we’re friends feels inauthentic to me. I can agree with someone and still consider another perspective, disagree with both sides or just stay neutral.

For example, my neighbor made a Facebook post about people honking at their elderly cat, which also has health issues. I replied, “Maybe it would be safer to keep the cat inside if it has health issues.”

I wasn’t blaming the owner or defending the people honking. I was just thinking about the cat’s safety, but people took it as criticism and got defensive.

Do you think certain MBTI types are more likely to experience this?

In my experience, it is a lot easier to tell an INFJ from an ISFJ than it is to tell an INFP from an ISFP.

He is still taking care of me even when he is sick. ESTJ @s the best!!!

I get different results using different platforms so for the experts out there, what is the most accurate and thorough test online?

Which MBTI type is the funniest? Drop your best joke and let’s find out.

Now first of all I don't hate people who like mbti or things as such as that hence why I'm saying this in a literal mbti community and I'm not here to bother people, but I really want people to know that they shouldn't try so hard to seem like the mbti that they are.

I noticed this pattern in a shit ton of people especially on tiktok or social media in general. whenever a video is posted about characters and their mbti let's say for example ENTP; now entp characters are shown in a video let's check the comments, boom they're all just random people trying so hard to seem self centered or trying to seem like they have a big ego or they're like those characters shown in the video, smart, humorous, sarcastic, and literal inventors. You'll notice people trying so hard to be that way and it's so ridiculously noticeable but no one seems to talk about it.

you don't have to make something your entire personality, you don't have to change the smallest things about yourself JUST because of again assigned mbti.

Mbti shouldnt be taken this seriously, be yourself you don't have to act like these random characters, you don't have to hate a whole mbti just because you're intp and you're trying to seem more "introverted and hateful" to fit in your mbti's stereotype.

Hi all.

Sorry this a bit long but I really need some advice, particularly from INFJs, because I am currently doing the extremely INFP thing of feeling everything and then analysing the hell out of it.

I’m an INFP female and also an HSP. I feel things very deeply. I’m whimsical, sentimental, excitable, I love people and animals and nature and stars and tiny beautiful things. I tend to see a lot of wonder in the world.

This is relevant, I promise. 😂

After a string of pretty bad dating experiences (including a controlling relationship), I had consciously decided to keep my options VERY open and not allow myself to get excited about any one man too quickly (because I get hurt easily).

This is actually difficult for me. Even platonically, when I meet someone and think, Oh! You might be one of my people, I get genuinely excited about having that person in my life.

So with dating, I've been trying very hard to rein that part of myself in and protect my heart a little better.

Then I met this guy on a dating app.

He lives a couple of hours away from me at the moment, although he permanently lives in another state. His job is pretty gruelling and operates on roughly a two-weeks-on/two-weeks-off arrangement.

When we very first started talking, he seemed extremely enthusiastic. He sent me multiple voice notes, was quite persistent about talking to me and seemed very interested.

Then, after that initial period, his communication became much more sporadic.

I didn't know he was an INFJ at this point (among the 50,000 topics that we talked about on our date - MBTI was one of them and he told me he is INFJ).

Under my new self-protective dating rules, sporadic communication = he's probably talking to/dating a lot of women, or he's just not particularly interested in me.

And that's fine. People are allowed not to be interested in me. But if I think that's what's happening, I deliberately don't let myself become emotionally invested.

So I had actually been putting off meeting him and continued talking to other potential dates (which to be honest I am very much a person who prefers having 1 connection only but as I said - bad experiences have made me shut that part of myself down a little)

He'd hinted at meeting before but never really made a plan with me so to be honest I had kinda given up on the idea of him. He had gone back to his home state for his 'off' cycle and he was very quiet during that time - lucky if i got a good morning or anything so I actually made the decision to cut off any feelings I had about him and I meeting up/being a thing. As such I stopped opening his messages immediately and let them sit for while. Eventually he noticed and suddenly he had double texted/sent a pic or something. I still didn't budge on the thought in my mind but I still talked a bit to him.

Last Thursday he asked if I was going to be in Brisbane that weekend. I told him no because I had already had plans (I did which I had made because I felt he wasn't interested in me really!!).

Then my plans unexpectedly changed on Saturday and I was pretty annoyed about it so I made the decision that rather than sit around being angry I was going to go for a drive to the city 2 ours away even if i just went and sat in a cafe.

Right at that moment he sent me a message and during course of convo - I told him I might actually go to Brisbane that night.

Full disclosure: I was kinda hoping he'd say he wanted to see me.

He did.

And suddenly this sporadic, difficult-to-read man was VERY enthusiastic.

He told me when he finished work and essentially said, I finish at 1:30, I can be anywhere by 3.

Eventually I directly asked, "Would you actually want to meet me if I came to Brisbane tonight?"

And he basically responded:

"Yes, of course. I've been waiting a long time."

And I remember thinking: YOU HAVE????????!

Because I genuinely had absolutely no idea.

Nothing about the frequency of his messages had given me the impression that this man was sitting there eagerly waiting to meet me. He didn't have his car with him, so he initially said he'd catch a train to wherever he could meet me. Instead I offered to pick him up from work. I suggested we go to a lookout I love just because the view is so pretty. He told me he'd never been there before but had always wanted to go, which made me ridiculously happy.

Then I met him.

And...

Oh.

I genuinely don't know how to explain what happened in my brain when I saw him without sounding completely ridiculous. I've dated. I've had relationships. I've been attracted to men. I've really liked men. I have never in my life experienced whatever the hell happened when I met this man.

We'd already joked beforehand about me being a hugger because I like to always check with other humans that they are okay with my greeting hugs rather than just hugging them unannounced) and he said he wanted me to hug him when we met. As such after getting out of the car and then freaking out because the handsomest tallest man was walking towards me - I immediately hugged him (the next day he told me he really liked that first hug). Within about five minutes of driving, I'd already blurted out something along the lines of:

"Wow. You're so handsome. It's actually difficult to concentrate on driving while you're sitting there in my passenger seat." Very smooth of me. 😂

At some point, my hand apparently developed a mind of its own and ended up resting on his knee. He immediately reciprocated and put his hand on my leg and we held hands the whole drive then. About 20 minutes into the drive, we stopped at a traffic light and because apparently I become a bizarre little creature when I really like someone, I gestured for him to come closer and kissed him on the cheek. About three traffic lights later, he suddenly leaned over and kissed me on the cheek just as I had done to him.

We got to the lookout and ended up spending HOURS together. Talking. Laughing. Hugging. Kissing. Holding each other. Just being close. And he stared at me constantly. I don't mean quick glances. There were so many moments where I'd realise he was just... staring at me. And I loved it. There was obviously a lot of physical attraction between us as well. Some other things nearly happened but logistics and him being a gentleman prevented it, which was probably for the best. But honestly, the physical/sexual part isn't even the thing that's stuck with me.

I just felt incredibly comfortable with him.

During the closing of the date after I drove him back to work he asked when I'd next be in Brisbane. I told him the following Sunday and we basically agreed we'd see each other again that night. There's also something he's really interested in, and during our date I told him I'd thought of something special I'd like to take him to do sometime (he has a particular thing he really geeks out on and I want to take him on a special date related to that). He seemed genuinely excited about it and said he'd love that. I lost my phone somewhere in the car and he said 'that reminds me' and said he would call my phone and I cutely asked 'are you asking me for my ph number'. he said yes and then put it in his phone. note he has not used my phone number since and continues to message me via snap :|

Eventually I had to leave because I had a couple of hours to drive home and he had work the next day (well that day cos it was after midnight). Before I left him, I jokingly told him to send me a message so I'd have something cute waiting to read when I finally got home. When I got home, there was a message waiting for me:

"Night night, cutie. I had a great time with you tonight."

I told him I'd had a great time too.

The next day we messaged back and forth on Snapchat and everything still seemed really positive. Because he'd stared at me so much during our date, I actually told him:

"I liked it when you were looking at me last night."

He replied:

"I couldn't keep my eyes off you."

Which, obviously, did absolutely nothing to help my poor INFP brain remain emotionally sensible about this situation.😂. I told him I'd wanted to look at him more too, but I was worried I'd look goofy sitting there staring at him. He said "you looked pretty".

So at that point, I really wasn't getting the impression that he'd woken up the next morning regretting the date or that the attraction had been one-sided. If anything, I thought he was confirming that he'd felt it too. Monday there wasn't heaps of communication, but there was some. He asked what I do for work. We talked a little about that. Then there was a gap of quite a few hours, after which he initiated a conversation with me again and messaged:

"How was your day, cutie?"

I told him what I'd been doing and that I was at the gym. Later we were talking about stars and he said he was jealous. He also randomly asked me whether I work all weekdays. I answered, but then I worried my answer wasn't clear enough and explained it again. He basically said he'd realised what I meant the first time. And I admitted: "Sometimes I overthink what I've said."

Which may be the understatement of the century considering I'm now writing an essay about this man on Reddit.

Tuesday morning, I messaged him first to wish him a good day (did nto want him to feel like he has to make all the effort). He sent me a screenshot of something he was doing for work. I teased him about it, he responded with something pretty sexual and we continued an inside joke from our date.

Later in the day I went outside. The wind was blowing through the trees and the birds were singing and it just sounded really peaceful. Because I know his job can be intense and noisy, I took a little video and sent it to him, basically saying that the birds and wind sounded nice and he could listen to it if he wanted a break from the noisy world. He heart-reacted to it. A bit later, I sent him another message. I had been thinking about that particular thing he'd done during our date that had made me feel really safe. So I thanked him for it. I basically told him that he'd made me feel safe in that moment, that I appreciated it and that I appreciated that he was a good man. I specifically added that he didn't need to answer because I knew he was working (and also because I knew from our date that he is INFJ so didn't want him to feel pressured in any way to respond to me).

He replied anyway with a thank you, a red heart and a kissy face. I somehow didn't notice the kissy face at first. About half an hour later I saw it and sent a kissy face back.

And...

Nothing since.

It's now been almost 24 hours and this is where my brain is fighting an actual civil war with itself.

One part of me says:

If a man really likes you, he wants to talk to you. A man who's genuinely excited about you doesn't just leave you sitting on read for 24 hours after a date like that. He's lost interest. Accept it and move on.

Another part says:

But this man already demonstrated BEFORE meeting you that he can communicate sporadically even when he apparently IS interested. You literally thought he wasn't that interested, only to discover he'd apparently been "waiting a long time" to meet you. His job is intense. Maybe he disappears into his own world when he's working. Stop panicking.

Then there's a third part yelling:

personality type doesn't matter. If someone is really into you, they'll contact you even if they are doing underwater research.

So I genuinely don't know what to think. I haven't double-texted him. I haven't asked if something is wrong. I haven't sent another meme/video/photo or tried to manufacture an excuse to talk to him. I've just left it. My last contact with him is literally the kissy face I sent back yesterday. Technically, as far as I know, we still have plans to see each other Sunday night when I'm in Brisbane but I am starting to feel like that may not be the case.

But I really, really like this man.

And the LAST thing I want to do is take someone who actually does feel positively toward me and turn him off because I suddenly become needy, clingy or demanding of constant reassurance. At the same time, my previous dating experiences have taught me to associate silence with somebody losing interest. The last time I tried being the chill woman who gives a man space, I literally told a guy, "Don't worry about texting me for a few days." He REALLY took me up on that offer. Eventually I had to contact him the night before our supposed date to find out whether it was even happening. He cancelled saying 'I feel like I can't be what you need' (mind you he barely knew me let alone what I do or don't want haha) then two weeks later starts blowing up my phone and doing grand gestures left and right before being an ass that I had to cut off.

So silence does not exactly make my nervous system sing with joy.

There's another complication too: there's a significant age gap between this INFJ man and me - more than would generally be considered typical. He matched with me knowing that and I brought it up again during our very first conversation but he was persistent and said he couldn't care less about it.

Strangely, though, that isn't even what's worrying me right now.

What scares me is the possibility that I experienced something enormously meaningful that perhaps he just... didn't. Because when I say this felt different, I mean different. I'm very genuinely an INFP to my core. I'm whimsical. I'm sentimental. I'm ridiculously sensitive. I get excited about tiny beautiful things. I see a lot of wonder in the world. And meeting him felt like stars exploding in front of me. Lame? Probably. But it's genuinely the only way I know how to describe it. I have never experienced that feeling with a man before in my entire life.

And maybe that's exactly why 24 hours of silence feels so enormous to me when objectively it... probably isn't enormous.

So, INFJs of Reddit, please help an INFP out.

Does his behaviour sound consistent with an INFJ who could genuinely be VERY interested in someone but still happily disappear into his own world for a day or two, especially while working?

Is 24 hours of silence something that wouldn't even register as significant to you?

Do I leave him completely alone and wait for him to contact me?

Or would an INFJ actually appreciate receiving a little message from someone they like, rather than interpreting it as pressure or neediness?

And at what point would you interpret this kind of silence as lack of interest?

Because right now I can't tell whether I'm supposed to give this lovely, mysterious INFJ man some space...

...or accept that he didn't feel what I felt, give up and spend the next year dramatically listening to Lana Del Rey while staring out of rain-covered windows, missing him and wishing I'd never discovered what an actual connection feels like.

Please advise. 😂

Basically I’ve been the only person in the group that got really into mbti a while back. I know all about functions stacks and everything. I’ve typed the group over time in my head and come to pretty good conclusions for everyone. Besides just knowing the theory, as stereotypical as it sounds I think using the archetypes/characters we most associate with each member as pretty directly connecting with the typings I made for them.

Only problem is since they took 16 personalities, a good amount of them have mistyped themselves pretty badly. We have a clear ISTP who thinks he’s an INTP, an ISTJ thinking he’s an Isfj, and an ESFP thinking he’s an ENFP as well as multiple isfps thinking their infp or Infjs. I don’t know how to tell them they mistyped without seeming like a total dick or a know it all.