u/BugNo702

For the longest time after my husband passed I isolated myself sooo much without even realizing it. Like I got so used to just being alone and keeping everything in my own head that normal conversations started feeling exhausting sometimes. I just feel like normal people couldnt relate to me. Like yea everybody would say comforting stuff but they didnt understand even half the pain i went through, thats why id come on this forum so much and read online because i feel like here atleast people understood.

Even when friends talked about relationships or dating stuff I’d just sit there thinking damn… people really dont realise how quickly life can change. Like if i could go back theres so much i would change..

But lately I’ve been trying to get out of that mindset a little. I’ve been trying to talk to people more, make new friends, go out more instead of staying home all the time. even started chatting more recently which honestly felt insane after years of not even thinking about any of that.

And the weird thing is it didnt make me miss or love him any less at all. Like im happy that im fully at the point where i know both can co exist. Like parallely.

I think that’s something I’m slowly understanding now. You dont really “move on” from someone you loved like that. You still miss them randomly all the time. You still think about them. But eventually life starts moving beside the grief instead of feeling completely stopped because of it.

Idk if anyone else relates to this but sometimes I feel like I’m learning how to be a person again after spending years just surviving everything, if anyone wants to share id love to know what it was like opening up urself again and how u began to socialize and relearning everything after losing ur person.

We would visit the Maldives together when my late husband was still alive...One of my favorite countries ever and I wish i lived there... Id go back anytime.

https://preview.redd.it/xyehzfubux1h1.jpg?width=915&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=45ca5ae635e9171060a031285d8160b45d1b3358

This might be oddly specific, but do farmers actually get attached to certain animals the same way people get attached to pets, or do you eventually become emotionally detached because it’s work/livestock? I grew up far away from anything rural so I’ve always wondered how people mentally separate the emotional side from the practical side.

I’ve lived in cities basically my whole life, but my mom used to keep a tiny little garden when I was younger and I remember getting weirdly attached to even the plants so I’ve always wondered how that works on an actual farm scale.

Lost my husband years ago and Maldives was one of our favorite place to go. Ive been thinking about returning but my heart feels so heavy going alone.

Looking for locals or fellow tourists willing to hangout and keep each other company. Hopefully looking to spend a month or two there and then returning and coming back again. Looking to make some good friends and company there currently im based in the states, F45. Would be better for people around similar age-ish!!! Ive been to Maafushi, Sun siyam, Four seasons, and conrad before.. Looking to add to the list and also spend more time on the local islands and indulge in the culture...

Hi everyone ive been actively reading on here for some time but ive never, well the day has come today.

Ive been grieving my husband for the past 5 years and i genuinly thought that part of me died with him honestly. I stayed loyal to the memory of what we had bc our love was real and losing him changed me completely.

but lately ive been thinking alot and everytime i even think about maybe opening up emotionally someday or letting someone else into my life this horrible wave of guilt hits me. Not because ive done anything wront but because my brain keeps going 'what if i wanted to move on one day' and i immedaitely feel guilty for even thinking it...

Sometimes i literally sit there wondering what if he’s watching me from above and feels disappointed in me for even being capable of feeling something for another man one day. And i know that probably sounds dramatic but grief messes with your head so much.

At the same time another part of me wonders if love after loss is normal. Like am i allowed to still love my husband and stay loyal to what we had while also being open to new possibilities eventually? Or does that make me a bad person?

My family and friends keep telling me life doesnt stop and that i deserve happiness too but its hard because loving someone who passed away doesnt just disappear because time passed.

I just wanna know if anyone else who lost a spouse has felt this kind of guilt before. How do you even begin opening your heart again without feeling like you’re leaving them behind?