u/Busy-Delivery-726

I’m so depressed and I’ve been crying so long, and there really feels like there’s no escape from my family. They’re not abusive or anything, but I hate them so much, I hate being around them. I want to move out but I have no money, and now I’m left crying so hard my head aches and I’ve lost my appetite. I used to be in college and I had the time of my life because I got to be far away from my family but now that I’ve graduated I’m forced to live with them again because I have no money. I’m so tired.

I need to leave my house. I can’t stand this anymore. I have no money but I want to get out of my house NOW. This instant. I want to move out NOW. I don’t want to live in my house a single day longer.

There MUST be a way I can leave. Please please offer any help.

I have no choice but to live with my parents because I have no fucking money. And because I live with them, I have to sit and listen to them lecture me over and over again about why I should go to law school. I’m literally only taking the fucking LSAT to get them to shut the fuck up about it. The last time I tried to put my foot down and told them all the reasons why I didn’t want to go to law school, we had the most explosive argument ever and I cried so hard.

I gave them all these reasons why I didn’t want to go:
• I told them my mental health was so bad and that law school would make it worse. Of course, my parents don’t believe in mental health struggles so they said law school would actually help my mental health (how the fuck does that even work?)
• I told them law school would make me suicidal and that I’m scared I might kill myself if I go to law school (this offended them and made them scream at me louder)
• I told them I didn’t even want to be a lawyer (they told me I don’t need to be a lawyer, but I should still go to law school because I could do anything I wanted after that and make a lot of money somehow)
• I told them about how every time I try to study for the LSAT, I just sit at my desk staring at my textbook and I just dissociate and feel like crying (they told me “but NOBODY likes studying for the LSAT, that’s normal”)

My parents keep asking me “well then what other plan do you have?” But whenever I tell them something I want to do with my life, it’s not good enough. I want to join the fire department, but it’s not as prestigious as my parents want, so I’ve been keeping it a secret but it’s been a struggle to break into that career.

I feel trapped. I wish I could just somehow win the lottery so I could move far away from my parents and never look back, and I feel terrible about that because my parents love me and keep a roof over my head, feed me, buy stuff for me. I feel guilty that if I had the opportunity, I’d leave them in an instant. None of my white friends understand. The keep telling me “just tell them no, you’re an adult.” And it’s like, yeah, I’m an adult, but I’m financially dependent on my parents and I have no life.