Hi all,
Got already fed up with the massive amount of cheaters on PC in February but its gotten worse by a lot. Switched to PS5 and totally fell in love with the game again.
Shame that Embark doesnt give a toss but still have a blast on PS5 and the community seems quite active so come on over if youre fed up as well.
Hi all,
Got already fed up with the massive amount of cheaters on PC in February but its gotten worse by a lot. Switched to PS5 and totally fell in love with the game again.
Shame that Embark doesnt give a toss but still have a blast on PS5 and the community seems quite active so come on over if youre fed up as well.
Hi all,
Dont really know why I am posting here as probably nobody can help me but I truly am close to ending it.
Ive suffered a brutal brain injury in 2020 due to a benzo and snri CT and have dealt with, from what ive seen, with some of the most brutal akathisia, terror and neurological fallout that ive seen, non stop, without windows, for years.
My akathisia ended after 5.5 years but i am still incredibly damaged. I am so damaged that I can not take care of myself. Ive also developed a severe auto-immune disease and am desperately ill. My brain feels permanently damaged. My soul feels ripped out of my body, im stuck with complete anhedonia and am highly suicidal.
Im clear of any meds for years and besides the akathisia passing my other neurological problems are not (dystonia, tachycardia, insane headaches, weird perception of the world, lost my inner monologue, lost my soul, insomnia, can only feel deep sadness and desair, lost my feeling to the world, cant feel ‘time’ anymore or anything else for that matter). My dopamine receptors feel permanently fried. So fried that sometimes the only way out I see it reinstating on a low amount of an snri but i know if that goes wrong i will insta delete myself the same day.
I am too much of a coward to end it but I think about it all day. Thats the simple truth. I cant accept what these meds have done to me and i refuse to give up because of that but I also cant continue living like this if that makes sense. I am severely traumatized and have lost everything due to this but I am not in a position or have the energy to recover any more. I am being tortured on a daily basis and I just cant do it anymore. My body feels damaged the entire day and I cant explain the feeling well to others.
I feel like the damage is permanent. I could feel it immidiately in 2020 and knew i suffered braindamage.
I guess not everybody heals from a severe injury.
Not really know why i am posting but I never share much and had to vent this even if its the last thing I do.