u/CardiologistLost9615

Hear me out. I need some ginger nerdy friends in my life. And before the internet does its thing no, I don't just mean guys. I am looking for the whole red-headed, socially awkward, overly enthusiastic "stereotyped" individuals

​If you’re wondering why anyone would actively hunt down this specific demographic I also have no idea I just want that whole vibe in my circle.

​I feel like as someone who mostly interacts with people outside my race I've had the opportunity to talk to everyone except gingers and red heads out of the stereotypes I know not that they are necessarily like this They usually have the best, most self-deprecating humor, they're always down for a lowkey night of binging a good series , and they actually get passionate about random niche topics instead of just being dry. Plus, you always know exactly who to look for in a crowded room.

So yeah but just because I wanna interact with them doesn't necessarily mean it's mutual but though I'm being hopeful heads up I'm from kenya so no one should be shocked later on

Sooooo yeah anyway long story short I need advice with my dilemma I guess mostly girls but guys too I guess just not weirdos strictly not here to be flirty etc anyway it's about a potential relationship so mhm just don't judge if you reach out and I explain everything

Soooooo out of all the countries I could find a consistent friend from it was a country stereotyped to be full of cold guys German and honestly this is one of the best friendships I could ask for the rest are mostly from the USA but these are people after certain shit and I am not in the mood for any of that bulkshit idk maybe I should expand my borders but anyway I guess I click with German better because I'll be moving there next year from kenya so eh lemme hope I'll make other friends

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I’m looking for a very specific group of people: neurodivergent introverts who work in tech but are actually into fitness I can't explain why I realized every person I've had long term friendships with are very specific including people I've been with before but yes I think I mostly wanna figure out why this is the case I guess strictly talking about friends both girls and guys no don't be weird smh and ffs don't come here to be creepy I'll block you fr fr and I will also blocks mfs why use this to lie to me bcs I will ask for proof yeah

Also I'm from kenya just so ypu know and understand the post

I'm in a dilemma

So I'm talking to 2 people right now no not dating not even talking stages but ofcourse I can feel some "liking" to both so both of them are from Germany I'll be moving to Germany next year so that's where we clicked

Idk I think none of us want to maintain a platonic relationship in the near future but none of us have steered heavily towards that anyway

Guy 1. he's almost the stereotyped German introverted cold serious calculated but after talking more he has gotten sweet more open helps me with my German and let's me play around like just be dumb without feeling like he is too serious and he's really respectful although he's mentioned sth sexual twice not towards me just explaining himself I was not uncomfortable

Guy 2. He is not the typical German he's Italian living in German we met not so long ago but I think we've facetimed 5 times in a day not even to say anything important he will always reply my voicenotes with facetime unless I'm in class he's really nice a bit more outgoing and extrovert he smiles a lot tho acts like a kid sometime idk he makes me feel really comfortable or just happy not that guy 1 does not but idk

I'm stuck if I was to just pick one to continue and see where it would head to and strictly maintain something platonic with another what would it be or shpuld we stick to this till I feel like oh this is the one

Like I'm still bored and no I am not in the mood to entertain any weirdos shit like if I even see a hint of "hey pretty" I will block you and your bloodline

I JUST FEEL VERY FRUSTRATED

No it's not ones fault but ugh yeah I'm Kenyan idek why I'm posting this like idk someone say something funny

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I need someone to explain the math here because I’m actually tweaking is this a coincidence. I’ve realized there is a literally loop in my life so far I've dated 3 guys all of them had the same name all of them were introverts they all did the same course software engineering and were in the same campus but 2 were alumnis of the campus they also live in the same city currently so at first I thought oh it was just a crazy coincidence before I met the third Allan the third Allan looks 80% like the first one and they speak exactly the same all of them were online relationships and the first and last Allan's the one who were working had crossed paths before after some time I forgot it but from then on everytime I talk to someone new and someone I have a crush on they turn put to work under Tech I've never spoken to anyone who isn't from Tech unintentionally at this point I usually say it before and then they get really shocked how dod ypu know bluh bluh bluh wtf is going on my currwnt crush works in Tech too and he's not even from my country is the universe just getting lazy with the NPCs? Does anyone else have a specific name or career that just keeps haunting their dating life, or am I actually stuck in a ‘template’? WTF is going on??

So basically I'll be moving from my country to Germany late next year for my studies idk I feel like for my dating life I should focus on dating outside probably europe so far I've had a caouple of online relationships interracial but most guys can't handle long distmace for more than a year yeay I'm 19 I've had people from my country approach me irl but honestly I'm tired of giving Kenyan guys a chance anymore ugh they are heavily centered on hookup culture I feel like it would be a good move to find guys from outside so I get to learn about them without worrying about never meeting

Okay so I matched with this guy Hubert (25) today and honestly he’s literally 10/10 my type. He’s that polished entrepreneur/athlete vibe, very consistent photos, verified, etc. Since I’m moving to Europe next year for school, it felt like a perfect match because he’s already there.

​But the convo is… a lot lol.He just started with hello and said what he wants looking for a serious relationship and asked if I was willing to be with a white man and have a family I told him I hate hookup culture and he said this whole "protector and provider" speech. He’s already talking about marriage, having "beautiful children," and even quoting stats about how interracial couples have the lowest divorce rates. Like, we haven’t even been talking for a full day and he’s already acting like we’re starting a family??

​I like that he’s direct because I’m not here for games, but is this a red flag? It feels kinda scripted or like he's "future-faking" to get me invested fast. He already moved me to WhatsApp too. Is he just a serious guy who knows what he wants, or is this giving "too good to be true" vibes? Help lol.

Okay so I matched with this guy Hubert (25) today and honestly he’s literally 10/10 my type. He’s that polished entrepreneur/athlete vibe, very consistent photos, verified, etc. Since I’m moving to Europe next year for school, it felt like a perfect match because he’s already there.

​But the convo is… a lot lol.he had already started with he is looking for a serious thing etc I told him I hate hookup culture and he immediately went into this whole "protector and provider" speech. He’s already talking about marriage, having "beautiful children," and even quoting stats about how interracial couples have the lowest divorce rates. Like, we haven’t even been talking for a full day and he’s already acting like we’re starting a family??

​I like that he’s direct because I’m not here for games, but is this a red flag? It feels kinda scripted or like he's "future-faking" to get me invested fast. He already moved me to WhatsApp too. Is he just a serious guy who knows what he wants, or is this giving "too good to be true" vibes? Help lol.

Welcome. I’ll be your host, Gracia. Honestly, I’m out here acting like I have way too much free time on my hands—total cap because I definitely have classes tomorrow, but eh, we move.

​So basically, this is me inviting total strangers into a watch party because watching stuff alone is a trap. I’ve spent enough time watching thrillers to know that the person who stays by themselves is always the first to go, and I’m not trying to be a plot point today.

​I’m 18 from kenya and since campus is boring, I’m basically a professional at making questionable life choices—like hosting this party for people I don’t know. If you’re like normal not above 29 and definetly not a wondering lust dog and you’re down to watch something together and actually talk in the chat instead of just being a ghost, you’re invited.

So I've a couple of friends but came to realize most of them can't hold a conversation if you can't why not just say so or show effort and I feel like I should out what might be a deal breaker on other people's side I'm Kenyan so yes not most people would want to interact after so don't come over if you'll ghost after this information tf