u/Cautious_Term_2018

how much should i prepare to live in Jakarta for 2 weeks? is the cost similar to Kuala Lumpur?

i need a fresh restart, badly. i need to leave everything and everyone and sort my feelings out. bad news is, once i come back i know im going to feel this way again. it never stops. it never leaves me, i dont know how to ignore it. i need to go somewhere just a bit far, just a bit unfamiliar, just a bit foreign so this void can feel justified. but i know whatever i do is just a temporary escape, im always going to feel this way. im 22 now, its been a decade, i grew up but im also stuck. im too afraid to die and im too much of a pussy to end the life i couldnt find the purpose of. i look in the mirror and i look human, i have feelings and i talk, i walk and i behave like one. somehow, i dont feel like im one of you. i feel like an imposter. on some days, im so afraid someone might find out. i dont know what they will find out because im just another human. it’s so hard to explain. i can connect very well with everyone, i just cant maintain those connections. no matter what i do, there’s an unexplainable gap.