u/Character-Code-7482

I am not as boring as I seem. I want to get to know you, I actually do. Will you still come visit? If not I understand. I feel comfortable with you, and I am not sure why. I feel anchored. Centered. And I am okay with being friends. I am okay with seeing where it goes, too.

I'm just a nervous texter. Because of past experiences with people.

When I looked in your eyes it was like time stopped. And I feel silly for saying this. But i totally forgot what we were talking about. But I memorized the color of your eyes, and I want to see them again- because they were captivating. I had a flood of relaxation and felt so grounded and the moment stretched forever it seemed. I didn't want it to end. Its so silly of me.

Now, I am afraid whatever happened was one sided brain chemistry. And I don't want to read into it, if it was. But I do want to get to know you and be friends. I just get nervous about annoying people in general because I've had people push me away, even when I wasn't clingy, I was just trying to be kind.

I am unsure of how to approach you here.

People say "be yourself". I haven't been fully myself in so long- I've been tired, broken, and fragmented, I don't remember how to be anything. I just know I am curious about you right now. And I am quiet and shy. And I feel sad that you probably are not interested in me. The confidence I usually have in these situations is gone. Because I think you like someone else. And because I know more than i should about everything.

My own feelings are likely complex about this situation.

But those eyes. They got me. I hope I didn't miss some very important social cues. I am very bad at reading expressions through eyes.

I probably sound pathetic. Thats why this will never be sent.

You are more perceptive than anyone realizes. You noticed when my mood shifted immediately. You are attentive and kind... I know i want to get to know you a lot. But I think I actually like you (how much, I am not entirely sure... but there's definitely friendly interest. Maybe more)... this is hard for me to admit. Because that requires vulnerability. Vulnerability is difficult for me. I've been hurt a lot in the past.

I'm pretty sure you don't like me like that. But it would be cool to hang out and watch a movie, or go for a walk and get to know each other more. I know i feel comfortable with you, and that is rare for me. I see a person I value and would like to get to know. Even if just as friends. But I doubt it would be mutual as anything else. I am just so shy and I struggle with those interactions.

If I were younger I would have had the confidence but not anymore. I don't know. I really want to ask you for coffee and on a walk. But I should stay away. I just hope you know you're doing great. Keep up the good work.