u/CheapNeat4689

I lost my friend months ago and ever since, she haunts me. Her voice whispers in my ears, her sweet voice.

It’s going to rain again. She hated rain so much.... She would sleep on her little tiny bed whenever it used to rain. Frankly, she loved that Hindi song Ami Je Tomar, frantically putting it out on loudspeaker. She used to sing along with it while doing her nails.

Oh, she is passionate about nails. She loves colors and has been practicing nail art whenever she could. We talk a lot whenever we meet, but the last time was different. I could feel her energy shutting on and off. She would smile but her smile wasn’t the same. She would sip coffee while gazing somewhere else.

I met her because she had asked me if I could be her model for lash training. That day, we spoke for the third last time. After that, it was only phone calls, pretending to gossip but I felt something different during our last call. Something inside me wanted to talk with her a little longer, to pour my heart out to her and maybe even cry... i still dont know why

I was feeling low that day. She told me she had just woken up and hadn’t gotten out of bed.

“Bitch, it’s already 1 p.m. in the afternoon” I screamed in a giggly voice.

And she said “Let me freshen up, and I’ll call you back.”

and

I am still waiting for that call......

I lost my friend months ago and ever since, she haunts me. Her voice whispers in my ears, her sweet voice.

It’s going to rain again. She hated rain so much.... She would sleep on her little tiny bed whenever it used to rain. Frankly, she loved that Hindi song Ami Je Tomar, frantically putting it out on loudspeaker. She used to sing along with it while doing her nails.

Oh, she is passionate about nails. She loves colors and has been practicing nail art whenever she could. We talk a lot whenever we meet, but the last time was different. I could feel her energy shutting on and off. She would smile but her smile wasn’t the same. She would sip coffee while gazing somewhere else.

I met her because she had asked me if I could be her model for lash training. That day, we spoke for the third last time. After that, it was only phone calls, pretending to gossip but I felt something different during our last call. Something inside me wanted to talk with her a little longer, to pour my heart out to her and maybe even cry... i still dont know why

I was feeling low that day. She told me she had just woken up and hadn’t gotten out of bed.

“Bitch, it’s already 1 p.m. in the afternoon” I screamed in a giggly voice.

And she said “Let me freshen up, and I’ll call you back.”

and

I am still waiting for that call......

I lost my friend months ago and ever since, she haunts me. Her voice whispers in my ears, her sweet voice.

It’s going to rain again. She hated rain so much.... She would sleep on her little tiny bed whenever it used to rain. Frankly, she loved that Hindi song Ami Je Tomar, frantically putting it out on loudspeaker. She used to sing along with it while doing her nails.

Oh, she is passionate about nails. She loves colors and has been practicing nail art whenever she could. We talk a lot whenever we meet, but the last time was different. I could feel her energy shutting on and off. She would smile but her smile wasn’t the same. She would sip coffee while gazing somewhere else.

I met her because she had asked me if I could be her model for lash training. That day, we spoke for the third last time. After that, it was only phone calls, pretending to gossip but I felt something different during our last call. Something inside me wanted to talk with her a little longer, to pour my heart out to her and maybe even cry... i still dont know why

I was feeling low that day. She told me she had just woken up and hadn’t gotten out of bed.

“Bitch, it’s already 1 p.m. in the afternoon” I screamed in a giggly voice.

And she said “Let me freshen up, and I’ll call you back.”

and

I am still waiting for that call......

can you stay a little longer?
i haven’t talked to someone like this in ages.
i haven’t felt my lips beyond taking breaths.
can you talk to me a little longer?

my inner child has been dead,
and i have been grieving ever since,
performing CPR whenever i can.

can you be my friend?
so cyclical, i know.
i just want to rest my head on your shoulder,
admiring the lakes,
sipping coffee between coffee breaks.

can you be my lover for a moment?
take all i have to give
and shower me with love-bombing,
even if it is only for a second.

that kind of love,
i have only read in books.

can you be __

can i be myself?
can i be my lover?
can i be my friend?
can i be a doctor to my own brain?

can i…..
stay?

If my heart could bleed out 

It would bleed black 

If you could touch my soul 

It would make you sad 

If you could see in my eyes 

The scriptures of teary paradise 

If it was me holding you down 

I would’ve lied to meet you in next life 

Instead I’m weighing me down 

To feel the hallow ground

If you could see my heart,

It would make you understand why I bled so dark 

If I could let you in 

There will be chairs for two 

Deep conversations of fools 

Arguing who is ought to be true