u/CherrypopIsBestGirl

After the tragic loss of a player in TZoA: Rumble (otherwise known as Royale but better) we are looking for another jerker to take part in The Zone of Adventure: Piety, a story about 3 gods going to the mortal realm to prevent an evil dark ritual, unrelated to anything the McElroys have begun releasing recently I swear

We've been playing on Tuesdays at 8pm BST/UK so ideally be available at that time

These sessions (likely 4-6 of them, I am a fan of brevity) would be recorded and edited into episodes for this sub. I will hopefully get over my own self cringe and get these episodes all together to be released alongside TAZ Providence.

DM me if you are interested 👍

Reading their recaps alongside similar MaxFun podcasts is so painful.

It's so clear that their standard for content is low nonstop and they dont care about anything theyre doing, none of them take their work seriously, none of them except Clint (!) seem to know what is going on on their own show. It's uncomfortable to see this sort of low-energy disinterest in the world due to being bad at getting donations, especially alongside other MaxFun network podcasts where the hosts are doing interesting things both in and out of the podcast and are earning me money.

Throwing away my bummers and deleting the podcast from the network. Wish me (Jesse Thorn) luck.

I am here to propose the module for the next season of TAZ and why it's perfect for the McElroys: Tomb of Annihilation.

1. It's a dnd 5e module so they can play 5e and not fuck up the rules for a game I enjoy
2. It has travel and survival mechanics they can get wrong, then ignore for the rest of the game, giving the perfect TAZ experience
3. It takes place on a jungle island absolutely teeming with native characters our good good boys can either play (for Justin) or make decisions for (everyone else)
4. The premise of the module is that death and revival are functioning strangely, so it's perfect for a homebrewed final fight against a one word concept
5. The book starts with a pronunciation guide that will inevitably be ignored, which I just think would be kinda funny
6. The adventure is meant to be deadly, so we'd get to see whoever gets picked to DM (ideally Justin so he can play all the native characters) bending over backwards to save people from traps so that no player characters die

Thank you for coming to my TED talk

My homebrew module was entirely written by me, and yet I constantly see people saying I used AI to write it. It's not just rude, it's insulting to me as a passionate writer and DM.

Yes, I used AI art for the cover, monster arts, NPC portraits, formatting, and basically everything else — but that's only because I'm not an artist or formatter, I'm a writer and passionate DM. I want to delve into the stories of fantasy and share that world of stories with everyone else — for between 50 and 100 dollars, depending on which tier of slop you're willing to buy.

I wrote this module all by myself, and I certainly did not see a trend of RPG kickstarters being funded in nanoseconds and think "Wow, these idiot whales would by mud if it had a '5e' compatible label slapped on it, I can drain them dry!" and then put in minimal effort to produce a slop module so I could make money for free. I'm really passionate about DMing, which is why all the points I make about my product are just the top results from a 'what makes good dnd module' google search.

Prep less, game more (and also buy more of my modules please please please please I need more free money)

Also check out my map packs which, uh, wait fuck maps don't have any writing in them those are just pure AI products um shit don't look at those fuck oh god no I'm a real writer I swear please

Hey guys, Popular D&Dtuber here!

In today's video I'm going to be talking about 5 homebrew* rules that I came up with entirely by myself, but first, a word from our sponsor: Useless Trash.

Useless Trash is a product that you're going to use once then realise you've wasted your money on, and it's the perfect tool for people who have been conned into thinking DMing is extremely hard and requires a bunch of weird tools for.

[this continues for like 3 minutes]

Now onto the homebrew rules.

The first homebrew rule is one I like to call, Popular D&Dtuber's Countdown Clocks. Basically, whenever you have something that is going to occur in an amount of time, you use a countdown clock to countdown on a clock for when the thing that is going to occur in an amount of time occurs in the time of the amount of time. For example, imagine your players are doing something that allows me to either cosplay/animate/put up cool art for a long enough duration for me to hit 10 minutes and get ad revenue on this video. I'll also re-explain the concept like 3-4 more times even though its super easy to grasp and could be detailed in like, a sentence or two.

Now, you might be thinking, "Wait that's just a mechanic from Blades in the Dark, right?", but you're more likely thinking, "Holy shit Popular D&Dtuber that's so clever and smart, I'm an idiot chud who can't play anything other than D&D 5e 2014 (the minor rules changes to 2024 are too much for my brain)!", because these videos are the only thing that let me pay for food and so I have to make them about D&D 5e 2014 or no one will watch them. It's honestly kind of sad, it's clear I want to talk about other systems or like, literally anything else, but those videos barely scrape 10k views while anything 5e related gets to 100k at a minimum, which is odd because the very same people who love 5e say that the rules are just a guideline so why are they even so attached?

What was I saying? Oh, right, you don't care about what I'm actually saying in this video, you've already left a comment about a completely different rule that is, again, just taken directly from another game system. These videos are just kinda background noise so you can hear 'D&D' and 'homebrew' and kitchen sink fantasy terms used over and over.

Beholder, rogue, ranger, bard, oni, rakshasa, beholder again, mind flayer, Baldur's Gate 3.

Thank you guys so much for watching, be sure to like, subscribe, buy my merch and or kickstarter, join my patreon, Dungeons and Dragons, dice goblin, warlock.

^(*Disclaimer, these aren't homebrew rules I just took them all from Blades in the Dark, yeah not even like multiple systems it's just BitD paraphrased or sometimes straight up copied because I don't think Hbomberguy is going to make) ^(another) ^(plagiarism video so I should be safe)

I havent played a session in months people keep cancelling is there any way to prevent this :(((

*Do not give any of the following suggestions:

• Playing with a smaller group. I play D&D with my 9 friends and I refuse to drop any of them from the group. Unless we can all make it we won't play. This is non-negotiable.
• Scheduling a specific day and time each week. No, not all of my 9 friends would be able to make that every week.
• Playing even when some people can't make it. See the above point. If we aren't all there then some of us are missing out.
• Even inconsistent Mike? Especially inconsistent Mike, he's my closest friend. Yes, he might work different hours every week, and not even be that interested in D&D, but he HAS to be there because I primarily use D&D as a way to be in the same room as my friends.
• Hang out with your friends in a less scheduling based hobby. No.
• Playing online with strangers. Absolutely not. I can only engage in hobbies with people who are already my friends, and it's literally impossible to become friends with people you do hobbies with, especially ones that are predicated on the idea that you'd be interested in similar media genres and board games.
• Running as a DM. No. I barely have enough time each week to not read my character sheet, there's no way I could run something. Before you ask, yes, this learned helplessness does apply elsewhere in my life, including why I refuse to have potentially difficult conversations with my friends about which of them are actually interested in the hobby I'm interested in.
• Don't spend all your time complaining and being annoying so that people will actually want to spend time with you both inside and outside of D&D. No.
• Try StartPlaying.games! The site that's just the LFG subreddit but worse in basically every way and you have to pay for it? Is this a sponsored post? Don't you have to disclose that?
• Try another hobby rather than one you seem to actively find misery in. No, I have already shaped my personality around enjoying Dungeons and Dragons! I liked Critical Role! I buy dice! I will not change!

Hello good good boys I know you lurk about in these places

In your latest TTAZZ you have said you'll be releasing live shows until you come up with the next big idea for your 1 hour a week recording show that keeps your families housed and fed. Well that sounds like a lot of work, so may I suggest making someone else write it for you?

There are many people in the TTRPG space who are a) talented enough to write a good campaign/entire episode script if you really want to relax and b) will do so for the grand price of a single vegan ham sandwich. Even lacking in passion, or feeling a simmering hatred to your brothers (honestly fair) and father (okay this one is non negotiable you need to be nicer to Clint, unless it's like a fetish thing for him idk), you could simply read from a page with some slight changes for goofs and then not speak to your cast mates for the rest of the week.

/uj​ I'm only like half memeing with this, like if I had a show that I hated but got me a lot of money for the total work of sitting at my computer for a week I'd be willing to pay someone to write it for me if the ideas weren't there.

After the success of 'Curse of Strahd: Revamped, Revived, Reduced, Reused, Recycled, Reaffirmed, Reprogrammed, Reddited, Repeated, Renegotiated', we here at the Curse of Strahd subreddit have come out with an even more new rewrite of our beloved module, Curse of Strahd.

To be loved is to be changed, and that's only more true with the new and improved Curse of Strahd: Revamped, Revived, Reduced, Reused, Recycled, Regenerated, Regurgitated, Reprogrammed, Reddited, Repeated, Repeated, Reused, Renewed. This reimagining of Strahd is so distant from the original book you'll be saying "Wait, did any of us actually like this module? Or was it just the idea of a bisexual vampire incel and getting to do bad eastern european accents that excited us?"

Some of the larger changes include:
- Strahd is now pansexual
- The Village of Barovia has been renamed 'Tutorial Town', to avoid name confusion with 'Barovia' the land
- The D**th House is now the Unalive House
- Due to worries about portraying the Vistani as model minorities, they are back to being exclusively evil
- Baron Vargas Vallakovich is now pansexual
- You the player are now pansexual
- Baba Lysaga has been renamed Baba Lasagna, to tie in with the all new 'Pact of the Italian' warlock subclass
- The campaign will now be exclusively compatible with (Blood)Thirsty Sword Pansexuals, a TSL hack
- Due to worries about portraying gay people as model minorities, the Knights of the Silver Dragon are now homophobic and pansexual
- The Mommy Mommy Abbotessa in Krezk has been re-renamed to The Abbot
- A section for DM advice has been included at the start, with tips on how to hold your players hostage so they don't ghost you after the first two sessions again
- Lady Fiona Wachter is no longer an ogre

But there will be many, many more changes on top of that. Find it in the link below, where you will also find a collection of maps, token arts, and other content that has more effort put into it than the entire collective history of WotC has put out.

Hey buddy, just read over your character sheet and seen that you have a level in order cleric. Sorry to tell you this, but you need to be religious to use those mechanics. I know, I know, letting your allies attack when you cast spells on them is "thematic" for your war mage character, but if you look in the book you'll see that it says:

"...the ability to cast cleric spells relies on devotion and an intuitive sense of a deity's wishes."

So you need to be devoted to something to use these mechanics, okay? Glad we cleared that up.

Okay buddy you're really pushing it now. No, you can't just "reskin" it. I don't care that it's just one level. The makers of the game have decided that these mechanics are for people religiously devoted to law and order, you have to include that in your backstory to use it. You were already pushing it trying to play a creation bard instead of a war wizard for your "war mage who can summon and animate weapons" character. You can reflavour your spells, but your class? No, that's not allowed.

I was in a game where I played [Class] and it was really strong after my DM gave me homebrew magic items, abilities, interpreted every rule as charitably in my favour as they could, made nearly every combat include homebrew enemies that took extra damage from [Class] attacks, and-

What? You mean that, mechanically speaking, [Class] has worse abilities than the other classes and that any class can be good if you have a DM changing the rules to make it better? That it being strong only after the DM gave me the aforementioned homebrew magic items, abilities, inter-

No you're right, I don't need to repeat all that, sorry - but yeah that the DM giving me all that is, in fact, exactly the reason why so many people say that [Class] is bad? And the reason they say '[Class] is bad' is because '[Class] underperforms mechanically and you would be better off playing another class and just saying you're [Class] because there really isn't that much flavour tied [Class] mechanically so you may as well play something that doesn't require your DM bending over backwards to make it good' is really wordy and has been explained enough times you'd think people would understand it already and so you use the short hand of '[Class] is bad'?

Woah yeah now that you've explained that to me that does make sense.

Hey gang its me the person who normally would post that Royale has another episode out but forgot to today, I'm here to propose that we become a MysteryQuest subreddit for the following reasons:

1 - it, unlike TAZ, is good
2 - the series do different game systems and settings in what could be considered a TAZ like format
3 - said series are usually pretty short (like 4-8 episodes depending (actually now i need to figure out how many MysteryQuests series have started and finished while royale was running))
4 - i think you jerkers would genuinely enjoy it unlike Royale, which sucks doo doo dogshit

thank you for listening I'm going to go back to editing TZoA Rumble

With our book of DnD oneshots, you're armed with over 100 ready-to-play^(1) adventures. Perfect for when you've had no time to plan, or if a player drops out last minute, or if you just want an epic session without hours of planning^(2). 

Each DnD adventure in One-Shit Dunders takes around 3 hours^(3) to play and, because they're on two pages or less, you can read everything in minutes. The layouts are clean, the plot twists are fresh^(4), and you're covered from levels 1 to 20^(5). You'll spend less time reading and more time rolling. 

This A4-sized, 200-page hardcover book is a must-have^(6) for any game master who loves D&D^(7) but hates endless prep^(8).

^(1) You will still need to prep the monster stat blocks, battlemaps maps, NPC tokens, skill check mini-games, alternate paths for if anything goes against the vague outlines of adventures we've given you, and rework the oneshots themselves because they suck ass. Some of the vague outlines of adventures are pretty alright though I guess?

^(2) See footnote 1.

^(3) Closer to 2 hours if your players are able to read and remember their abilities in combat, but if that's the case you can just stall them out with multiple resource drain encounters.

^(4) Lmao

^(5) 90% of the adventures are for level 1-8 ish, then there's like 4 at the end for higher level play. We included these purely not to get sued for false advertising. Not that you'll play anything above 5th level anyway since the already tenuous 'balance' just breaks apart entirely, and your stupid chud players can't even read their own spells.

^(6) See footnote 4.

^(7) uj/ okay i know its fucking petty but they use 'DnD' in the rest of the description and 'D&D' here, like did you not have a proofreader? Is there a legal difference between using DnD and D&D? am I just stupid?

^(8) You're still gonna have to prep, lmao, enjoy your $40 shelf filler bozo

Are you tired of having disposable income? Then why not pledge to our shitty 5e Kickstarter where you get absolutely nothing! Most Kickstarters these days promise you​ something in return, but here at Popular DnD Group we understand that you're not actually going to use the stuff you kickstart anyway, so we'll save you some shelf space by not actually giving you anything.

FAQ:

Funded in 12 seconds? How is that even p​ossible??

Rather than set a goal that we'll actually need to reach to supply a functional product, we made the starting goal $1 so that we could fund it as fast as possible so we could make you think this Kickstarter is better than it is. Actually now that I think about it, we could've just not had any initial goal since, again, we're not even putting out a book. Fuck. Missed a trick there.

Is the product literally nothing? That's not a joke?

Yes and no, by which I mean yes to the first question and no to the second.

How many character options that I'll never get to use because they're either wildly overpowered or just not that fun (not even getting to the fact that only about 5-10 people worldwide are going to run a campaign with this product, and everyone else is going to tell me I can't use "that glorified dnd wiki homebrew you spent $200 on") will there be?

What? Just give us the money already.

Hello everyone it is I, the person who sometimes posts that a new episode is out because my lunch break is around that time. You might remember a few months ago when I said I wanted to make my own parody version of TAZ Royale

uhhh

Well I and some other jerkers have done that, with one episode that has been edited and put together. For understandable (I hope) reasons I don't want to post this raw onto YouTube because its for a niche sub community of an already niche community and I don't want people to stumble onto it randomly without context. So if you want to have a listen and give some feedback or a recap just DM me and I can send you a google drive link

“It’s like describing a dog to someone who’s never seen one, then asking them to draw one” is something Clark says to describe the Backrooms (the location) in Backrooms (the movie) and it makes sense. The Backrooms (location) has the elements of an office building/other buildings as you get deeper, but without the cohesion of an actual office building and with pieces that don't fit together the way they should if you actually knew what those pieces were. All fine and dandy.

But people (idiots) keep using that quote to describe the Backrooms (movie) and it doesn't make any fucking sense outside of "omg that's a quote from the movie I get it!!"

Nothing about the movie is weird structurally, if anything it follows a pretty standard horror movie structure. It even has an opening chase and kill scene! Outside of a few flashbacks the entire movie is in chronological order. This isn't an issue with the movie, but it is an issue with the people describing the movie using the dog quote.

I guess "It’s like describing a dog to someone who’s seen a lot of dogs, then asking them to draw one, and they draw a really normal dog because as previously stated they've seen a lot of dogs before" doesn't have the same ring to it, but it still pisses me off. If someone comments "This post is like describing a dog-" I will eviscerate them.

The one place I could see the quote apply is to the dialogue in this movie because it's sometimes really weird and stilted, especially near the end with the Async guy, but because any criticism of this movie is met with "Oh I bet you wanted it to be like the Roblox version" no one uses it that way for fear of social capital being lost.

TL;DR Dog quote for Backrooms (location) = good, for Backrooms (movie) = stupid

Sure thing! Here's a reddit post using spell rules as written to introduce Van Richten as a legendary vampire hunter:

In my campaign one of my players wanted to play a Warlock vampire hunter and he idolized Van Richten, so when my group met Van Richten I really wanted to show how clever of a vampire hunter he was since my group tends to fight vampires head on and they tend to be rules lawyers who insist on playing rules as written.

I created the following scene for them where Van Richten (as a Bard) sent a message to Volenta to meet him and the group of players by the Ivlis River at midnight, and he leaked to her that they had the Tome of Strahd with them to make sure she would come.

They arrived a few minutes early with no sign of Volenta, and by the side of the river Rictavio cast Forbiddance to make a 40,000 square feet section vampire death zone and explained to the group, "A Vampire in Ravenloft cannot be burned by sunlight, but this spell is genuinely insane as soon as you can cast 6th level spells. They don't even get a saving throw. All we have to do is get Volenta to stand within 200 feet of here.” He then pulled a pocketwatch from his pocket and said, “The spell will last a day, not sure why I pulled the pocketwatch out, lmao"

At that moment Volenta would have came out from the shadows with a smirk on her face, if she wasn't taking 5d10 radiant damage per turn without a saving throw, and had either fled or disintegrated. Had she been there, she might've had a ChatGPT generated conversation about Mirage Arcane and how it is, in the case of vampire slaying, an inferior spell to Forbiddance.

"But wait how do you know that spell, it's cleric only?" Van Richten said in a mocking voice, as if he were imitating someone really stupid. "Ritual Caster feat. Anyway since I can cast this level of spell I'm going to go solo Strahd. Oh yeah Warlock vampire hunter guy go Pact of the Tome and take the ritual casting invocation so you can do this too alright bye."