u/CherrypopIsBestGirl

After the success of 'Curse of Strahd: Revamped, Revived, Reduced, Reused, Recycled, Reaffirmed, Reprogrammed, Reddited, Repeated, Renegotiated', we here at the Curse of Strahd subreddit have come out with an even more new rewrite of our beloved module, Curse of Strahd.

To be loved is to be changed, and that's only more true with the new and improved Curse of Strahd: Revamped, Revived, Reduced, Reused, Recycled, Regenerated, Regurgitated, Reprogrammed, Reddited, Repeated, Repeated, Reused, Renewed. This reimagining of Strahd is so distant from the original book you'll be saying "Wait, did any of us actually like this module? Or was it just the idea of a bisexual vampire incel and getting to do bad eastern european accents that excited us?"

Some of the larger changes include:
- Strahd is now pansexual
- The Village of Barovia has been renamed 'Tutorial Town', to avoid name confusion with 'Barovia' the land
- The D**th House is now the Unalive House
- Due to worries about portraying the Vistani as model minorities, they are back to being exclusively evil
- Baron Vargas Vallakovich is now pansexual
- You the player are now pansexual
- Baba Lysaga has been renamed Baba Lasagna, to tie in with the all new 'Pact of the Italian' warlock subclass
- The campaign will now be exclusively compatible with (Blood)Thirsty Sword Pansexuals, a TSL hack
- Due to worries about portraying gay people as model minorities, the Knights of the Silver Dragon are now homophobic and pansexual
- The Mommy Mommy Abbotessa in Krezk has been re-renamed to The Abbot
- A section for DM advice has been included at the start, with tips on how to hold your players hostage so they don't ghost you after the first two sessions again
- Lady Fiona Wachter is no longer an ogre

But there will be many, many more changes on top of that. Find it in the link below, where you will also find a collection of maps, token arts, and other content that has more effort put into it than the entire collective history of WotC has put out.

Hey buddy, just read over your character sheet and seen that you have a level in order cleric. Sorry to tell you this, but you need to be religious to use those mechanics. I know, I know, letting your allies attack when you cast spells on them is "thematic" for your war mage character, but if you look in the book you'll see that it says:

"...the ability to cast cleric spells relies on devotion and an intuitive sense of a deity's wishes."

So you need to be devoted to something to use these mechanics, okay? Glad we cleared that up.

Okay buddy you're really pushing it now. No, you can't just "reskin" it. I don't care that it's just one level. The makers of the game have decided that these mechanics are for people religiously devoted to law and order, you have to include that in your backstory to use it. You were already pushing it trying to play a creation bard instead of a war wizard for your "war mage who can summon and animate weapons" character. You can reflavour your spells, but your class? No, that's not allowed.

I was in a game where I played [Class] and it was really strong after my DM gave me homebrew magic items, abilities, interpreted every rule as charitably in my favour as they could, made nearly every combat include homebrew enemies that took extra damage from [Class] attacks, and-

What? You mean that, mechanically speaking, [Class] has worse abilities than the other classes and that any class can be good if you have a DM changing the rules to make it better? That it being strong only after the DM gave me the aforementioned homebrew magic items, abilities, inter-

No you're right, I don't need to repeat all that, sorry - but yeah that the DM giving me all that is, in fact, exactly the reason why so many people say that [Class] is bad? And the reason they say '[Class] is bad' is because '[Class] underperforms mechanically and you would be better off playing another class and just saying you're [Class] because there really isn't that much flavour tied [Class] mechanically so you may as well play something that doesn't require your DM bending over backwards to make it good' is really wordy and has been explained enough times you'd think people would understand it already and so you use the short hand of '[Class] is bad'?

Woah yeah now that you've explained that to me that does make sense.

Hey gang its me the person who normally would post that Royale has another episode out but forgot to today, I'm here to propose that we become a MysteryQuest subreddit for the following reasons:

1 - it, unlike TAZ, is good
2 - the series do different game systems and settings in what could be considered a TAZ like format
3 - said series are usually pretty short (like 4-8 episodes depending (actually now i need to figure out how many MysteryQuests series have started and finished while royale was running))
4 - i think you jerkers would genuinely enjoy it unlike Royale, which sucks doo doo dogshit

thank you for listening I'm going to go back to editing TZoA Rumble

With our book of DnD oneshots, you're armed with over 100 ready-to-play^(1) adventures. Perfect for when you've had no time to plan, or if a player drops out last minute, or if you just want an epic session without hours of planning^(2). 

Each DnD adventure in One-Shit Dunders takes around 3 hours^(3) to play and, because they're on two pages or less, you can read everything in minutes. The layouts are clean, the plot twists are fresh^(4), and you're covered from levels 1 to 20^(5). You'll spend less time reading and more time rolling. 

This A4-sized, 200-page hardcover book is a must-have^(6) for any game master who loves D&D^(7) but hates endless prep^(8).

^(1) You will still need to prep the monster stat blocks, battlemaps maps, NPC tokens, skill check mini-games, alternate paths for if anything goes against the vague outlines of adventures we've given you, and rework the oneshots themselves because they suck ass. Some of the vague outlines of adventures are pretty alright though I guess?

^(2) See footnote 1.

^(3) Closer to 2 hours if your players are able to read and remember their abilities in combat, but if that's the case you can just stall them out with multiple resource drain encounters.

^(4) Lmao

^(5) 90% of the adventures are for level 1-8 ish, then there's like 4 at the end for higher level play. We included these purely not to get sued for false advertising. Not that you'll play anything above 5th level anyway since the already tenuous 'balance' just breaks apart entirely, and your stupid chud players can't even read their own spells.

^(6) See footnote 4.

^(7) uj/ okay i know its fucking petty but they use 'DnD' in the rest of the description and 'D&D' here, like did you not have a proofreader? Is there a legal difference between using DnD and D&D? am I just stupid?

^(8) You're still gonna have to prep, lmao, enjoy your $40 shelf filler bozo

Are you tired of having disposable income? Then why not pledge to our shitty 5e Kickstarter where you get absolutely nothing! Most Kickstarters these days promise you​ something in return, but here at Popular DnD Group we understand that you're not actually going to use the stuff you kickstart anyway, so we'll save you some shelf space by not actually giving you anything.

FAQ:

Funded in 12 seconds? How is that even p​ossible??

Rather than set a goal that we'll actually need to reach to supply a functional product, we made the starting goal $1 so that we could fund it as fast as possible so we could make you think this Kickstarter is better than it is. Actually now that I think about it, we could've just not had any initial goal since, again, we're not even putting out a book. Fuck. Missed a trick there.

Is the product literally nothing? That's not a joke?

Yes and no, by which I mean yes to the first question and no to the second.

How many character options that I'll never get to use because they're either wildly overpowered or just not that fun (not even getting to the fact that only about 5-10 people worldwide are going to run a campaign with this product, and everyone else is going to tell me I can't use "that glorified dnd wiki homebrew you spent $200 on") will there be?

What? Just give us the money already.

Hello everyone it is I, the person who sometimes posts that a new episode is out because my lunch break is around that time. You might remember a few months ago when I said I wanted to make my own parody version of TAZ Royale

uhhh

Well I and some other jerkers have done that, with one episode that has been edited and put together. For understandable (I hope) reasons I don't want to post this raw onto YouTube because its for a niche sub community of an already niche community and I don't want people to stumble onto it randomly without context. So if you want to have a listen and give some feedback or a recap just DM me and I can send you a google drive link

“It’s like describing a dog to someone who’s never seen one, then asking them to draw one” is something Clark says to describe the Backrooms (the location) in Backrooms (the movie) and it makes sense. The Backrooms (location) has the elements of an office building/other buildings as you get deeper, but without the cohesion of an actual office building and with pieces that don't fit together the way they should if you actually knew what those pieces were. All fine and dandy.

But people (idiots) keep using that quote to describe the Backrooms (movie) and it doesn't make any fucking sense outside of "omg that's a quote from the movie I get it!!"

Nothing about the movie is weird structurally, if anything it follows a pretty standard horror movie structure. It even has an opening chase and kill scene! Outside of a few flashbacks the entire movie is in chronological order. This isn't an issue with the movie, but it is an issue with the people describing the movie using the dog quote.

I guess "It’s like describing a dog to someone who’s seen a lot of dogs, then asking them to draw one, and they draw a really normal dog because as previously stated they've seen a lot of dogs before" doesn't have the same ring to it, but it still pisses me off. If someone comments "This post is like describing a dog-" I will eviscerate them.

The one place I could see the quote apply is to the dialogue in this movie because it's sometimes really weird and stilted, especially near the end with the Async guy, but because any criticism of this movie is met with "Oh I bet you wanted it to be like the Roblox version" no one uses it that way for fear of social capital being lost.

TL;DR Dog quote for Backrooms (location) = good, for Backrooms (movie) = stupid

Sure thing! Here's a reddit post using spell rules as written to introduce Van Richten as a legendary vampire hunter:

In my campaign one of my players wanted to play a Warlock vampire hunter and he idolized Van Richten, so when my group met Van Richten I really wanted to show how clever of a vampire hunter he was since my group tends to fight vampires head on and they tend to be rules lawyers who insist on playing rules as written.

I created the following scene for them where Van Richten (as a Bard) sent a message to Volenta to meet him and the group of players by the Ivlis River at midnight, and he leaked to her that they had the Tome of Strahd with them to make sure she would come.

They arrived a few minutes early with no sign of Volenta, and by the side of the river Rictavio cast Forbiddance to make a 40,000 square feet section vampire death zone and explained to the group, "A Vampire in Ravenloft cannot be burned by sunlight, but this spell is genuinely insane as soon as you can cast 6th level spells. They don't even get a saving throw. All we have to do is get Volenta to stand within 200 feet of here.” He then pulled a pocketwatch from his pocket and said, “The spell will last a day, not sure why I pulled the pocketwatch out, lmao"

At that moment Volenta would have came out from the shadows with a smirk on her face, if she wasn't taking 5d10 radiant damage per turn without a saving throw, and had either fled or disintegrated. Had she been there, she might've had a ChatGPT generated conversation about Mirage Arcane and how it is, in the case of vampire slaying, an inferior spell to Forbiddance.

"But wait how do you know that spell, it's cleric only?" Van Richten said in a mocking voice, as if he were imitating someone really stupid. "Ritual Caster feat. Anyway since I can cast this level of spell I'm going to go solo Strahd. Oh yeah Warlock vampire hunter guy go Pact of the Tome and take the ritual casting invocation so you can do this too alright bye."

The Trial of Necromancy, Part III The trial continues and the competitors must decide who to trust and who to dispatch. But with the numbers of survivors dwindles, the number of zombies increases, forcing some of the wizards to quite literally confront their past actions.