u/Cod_Proper

Hi all,

I’ve been engaged to my British born Cantonese fiancé for over 2 years now. His parents left HK at 16 and have been in Europe ever since. They’re in their 70’s now.

I’m struggling to deal with them because they keep learning new things from their family to complain about. Most recent being that we got his mum a custom dress that cost £400 in a gorgeous navy blue and she looks stunning in it! But recently learned that blue is a funeral colour for Chinese people. So now she wants to swap to a “brighter” colour 😅

We’ve had some issues with them before as I wanted to do a tea ceremony and they didn’t, but were forced to by the elders in the family. They didn’t even want us to throw a wedding to be honest! So it’s been a fun time planning with that.

I thought I was pretty clued up on Chinese culture as my dad’s best friend is from HK and his kids and I grew up together, yet this one slipped.

Can anyone summarise some key things I might be missing please? Like those smaller nuances I might not be aware of?

TIA ❤️❤️❤️

Hi all!

I’m looking to see if this is a common thing that I can expect or if my skin is just super messed up. I’ve basically found in the last 10 years that my skin only looks good (zero acne, glowy, no fine lines and minimised pores) when it feels like it could be getting compromised (sensitive after washing or putting on product).

From age 20-24 I used a salicylic acid face wash morning and night, niacinamide and zinc serum on top and then rosehip oil as my moisturiser. SPF when it was higher than UV index 1 only. Had a few issues with sensitive skin after sun exposure. But my skin was the best I’d had since I finished antibiotics cor acne at 18.

Age 24-28 wanted to focus on my skin bareier, so I tried a bunch of different moisturisers, but they all made me break out (8-12 weeks before swapping to a different one). Tried oil cleansing (break out), tried different acne serums etc. Worst skin of my life for 4 years. Granted, I probably was reacting to the different changes. Constantly oily before midday, face looking greasy as anything. Wake up with pools of oil on my face. All 8-12 weeks of trying a product before changing to make sure I wasn’t just reacting to different products. Saw multiple private derms in the area. All just recommended their own products (tried) hydrafacials and laser treatments. No true fix.

Age 29-30 stripped back skincare to roundlab Dokdo cleanser, torriden HA serum and swap between BOJ red bean gel, BOJ dynasty, dr althea 345 and birch juice moisturiser depending on the humidity in the area or how sensitive my skin is feeling, with TO Azelaic Acid at 10% in the am along with SPF. Skin was still awful, constant breakouts on my cheeks and chin, greasy as anything constantly.

Started tret 3 months ago with this routine and my skin is on the sensitive side after washing and applying AA in the morning.

I’ve learnt that I’m pretty harsh with my towel when drying, so I need to calm that down. But my acne has dried up, the PIE is fading and I’m no longer greasy when I wake up or during the day.

TLDR; It feels like my skin is only good when it’s on the sensitive side, potentially leaning towards being compromised? But my skin is smooth, hydrated, minimal pores and bright right now. Is this to be expected?