AIITW for possibly breaking up my brother's marriage?
Spam account since most involved parties know my real one.
I 36M work with my SIL 27F who I guess we can call Ava. She and my brother 30M have been in a relationship for 4 years and married for 1. My brother that we'll call Ben and I have always been super close. He set me up with my fiance and jokingly "returning the favor" I got him in contact with Ava.
As backstory for me and Ava, she's one of my dearest friends. She interned for me when she first got to our company and after getting hired became one of the people that works in our tiny PR department. Being notably older and the head of the department, I sort of naturally took her under my wing. She has that vibe of a younger sister or cousin. We've hung out outside of work plenty of times, mostly in groups with Ben or coworkers, but sometimes alone if we're waiting for others to arrive or we're the last ones to leave. I love her dearly, and strictly platonically.
The trouble started on a work trip that our whole team had to go on. One morning, Ava came in late looking not the greatest. So, like the genius I am, went "Wow, you look awful" (I'm the asshole for that, I know) She told me she was just nauseous and, in another stroke of brilliance, I asked "What are you, pregnant?" (Yes I actually said that. It's a wonder I'm still employed, seeing as my job is based on people skills) Her face went blank and I tried to laugh it off, but she was dead serious. She explained that she'd actually just found out she's pregnant the night before and wanted to tell Ben in person when we got back. I was like cool, your secret's safe with me, and apologized profusely for being such a dick. She was totally chill about it and even said I could tell my fiance, who we both know is completely trustworthy.
A few days after we got back, Ben and Ava invited my fiance and I over for dinner. After lots of hugging, my fiance and I both told them congratulations and that we couldn't wait to be uncles. My brother's face completely dropped as he asked "What are you talking about?"
My fiance and I both tried to say something about a mix up or that we must have heard wrong, but Ben cut us off. He said that he and Ava would discuss it later and that we should just have a nice dinner. I figured it wasn't my business, so I just shut up. But halfway through dinner, my brother started acting weird. Out of the blue, he looks me dead in the eye and says "It's yours, isn't it?". I asked him what in the world he was talking about and he says "Don't play dumb. You knocked up my wife, didn't you? That's the only reason you would know before me."
I was shocked to say the least. I pointed at my very male, very gay fiance,insisting that I don't swing that way and even if I did, my brother's wife would be my very last choice of sexual partner. I tried to explain how I really found out, but he doubled down by accusing me of pretending to be gay just to get closer to Ava. Now, I'll be the first to admit that I don't "look gay", but questioning my sexuality, in front of my partner no less, is a line I will never let anyone cross, family or not. I told them that we were leaving and that the two of them seemed like they needed to talk.
The next morning I woke up to four missed calls from Ben, a voicemail of him spitting profanities and slurs at my partner and I, and a text telling me that Ava and I "deserved each other". He seemed hellbent on the fact that I was the father of Ava's baby. When I tried to call him, it went straight to voice mail. I think he blocked me. I also had a text from Ava telling me that Ben left and is planning on filing for divorce.
Am I the asshole for spoiling the pregnancy announcement? Is that the reason Ben lost his mind? I have so many questions and would just like a little insight from a fresh perspective. After writing all this out, I realize I'm gonna get people in the comments calling this fake. I wish it was. But on god, this is my real life.
Update: Thank you to everyone with kinds words and advice. I appreciate this little community for all their help. I do have a pretty major update on this whole shitshow.
I haven't talked to Ben since the dinner (5 days ago now) but I've spoken to Ava on the phone a couple times. She insisted that my brother is not abusive in any way, and I believe her. I had several comments suggesting that and just had to make sure. Thankfully, they were wrong.
But those of you saying that Ava/Ben was cheating? You couldn't have been more right.
This afternoon my fiance sat me down and said he had something he needed to get off his chest. Ava's baby is his. They've been having an affair for about six months. Both he and Ava are confident that he is the father.
Not only that, but he's been sleeping with my brother on and off for the past year. He says that Ben and Ava have no idea that he's hooking up with the other.
I'm sorry this post isn't more detailed, I didn't ask for specifics. Just thinking about it makes me want to vomit and I couldn't bear listening to my fiance explain himself. More details to come because I'm sure they'll come out whether I want to know or not. I don't even care, as far as I'm concerned all three relationships are broken. I'm completely lost. What do I even do? I lost my fiance, brother, and sister in one fell swoop.