u/Common-Soup-2245

Hey everyone,

I’m looking for some advice on how to handle a situation that caught me off guard recently and how to navigate these moments in general moving forward.

I play on a softball team. After our game, a teammate came up and asked why I ran off so early the week before. They wanted to know why I didn't stick around to have beers with the team like I used to. was caught off guard and didn't really know what to say.

This specific situation got me thinking about the bigger picture. I used to drink heavily with these guys, and I know I'm going to run into this same problem with many other people from my past moving forward.

I’m not entirely sure how I want to handle this going forward. Logically, I know I don’t owe anyone an explanation, but internally, I still feel like I do. I usually prefer to be honest, but the most difficult part for me right now is figuring out how honest to be. Do I just rip off the band-aid and say I'm sober so people stop asking, or do I keep it vague? I really need a game plan for when these questions inevitably pop up

How do you handle these situations in general with people you used to drink with but don't anymore? What are your go-to, low-stakes responses that deflect the question without making a big deal out of it?

Thanks in advance for any experience, strength, and hope you can share.

Edit: Just wanted to add I have no issue going to my truck and leaving after. Softball, being on a team, competition, has been great for sobriety, so I don't want to quit the team.

My friend and I got back into working out 3 weeks ago. It's been a while, so we started with 3 days a week, but now we want to follow a PPL schedule. I have seen PPLPLL(Rest) or PPL(Rest)PPL as suggestions. I'm not sure if we're at a 6-day-a-week schedule after only 3 weeks, but hey, maybe we can.

If we do only 4 or 5 days, how do we set up a PPL schedule?

Also, I currently do cardio just about every day. It's usually a 3-5mile walk outside to get that Vitamin D, fresh air, and great views. I would like to incorporate some swimming. Would swimming and lifting on the same day be overkill?

I feel like a noob asking this stuff, but I figured I might as well ask and see what opnions/advice I get

Someone posted on here the other day about "What do beginners tend to overcomplicate?" and it got me thinking about how I should approach this run at the gym.

I recently got sober, and I bring that up because it means I'm not putting booze or drugs into my system. Also, it's something I plan to do for the rest of my life, which is how I want to treat my gym/fitness future. Something I do for life. So I don't mind taking things slow and building good habits and routines that I can do for life.

Since I am just starting, I'm seeing people say to focus on protein, sleep, hydration, and consistency. I don't want to overcomplicate it, but is there anything else important for someone just starting?

I am eating better, but still indulge in sweets and diet sodas sometimes since I'm earlier in sobriety. I get 6-8 hours of sleep a night, mostly 7-8. I drink water most of the day. I just need to hit protein goals more often. Someone recommended 5 g of creatine daily. As far as workouts go, we've kinda just been winging it. Trying to do PPL, or we try to focus on muscle groups, but it ends up being sporadic and random since we're new.

Is there any advice or experience for someone who's been out of the gym for years and wants to create good habits and routines for life?

I'm at 109 days of sobriety. My life is improving daily, but I can struggle with loneliness. I attend meetings daily and volunteer a couple of times a week at a free detox. I hang out and do fun things with other alcoholics, but I'd love to find a girl to share this growth with. I don't want to date anyone in the rooms. The rooms are for sobriety. If something happens down the road, maybe, but right now I'd rather find someone out in the world.

What did you do in early sobriety to deal with this? I could do the dating apps but that's all I can really think of

edit: I should have said the "loneliness" ebbs and flows. I don't mind being solo; I just romanticize dating/having a gf