u/CommonBelt3536

so since new years and my birthday, or whatever I made a resolve to be more honest about my feelings since i've been quite uncomfortable and unhappy with certain things in life. yada yada. honestly, it wasnt really a new years thing, its just that people (ahem my friends) have been saying things that hurt/annoy me or others and it seems to stem from problems that weren't addressed early on. Its just coincidence this happened during new years. So I decided to just be a bit more honest. Well, it doesnt fucking work! Not even with small things. Today, I was telling my mom if she could move back since its hot in the house (ac isnt working). Plus, I have never been too comfortable when people get too close to me, dunno why, its always been a thing. I typically lean back rather than verbalize it though. Either way, my mom looked shocked but moved back to a whole 'nother seat (when I just meant for her to lean back cause she was leaning too close to me), however my dad was like "oh thats disrespectful." Huh? So I tried to clarify I didn't mean anything by it, but I can't tell if my mom is offended or not. It's hard to tell with her, but I felt bad either way. But my dad just kept on mentioning how rude it was, but he's gonna "keep himself out of it" despite him continuing to say I was being disrespectful. I can admit I said it a bit too bluntly so perhaps it did sound disrespectful. So I really tried to explain myself and apologize, but idk if it came across well. My mom said it was fine, that she understands, but my dad's words make me feel otherwise. It makes me not trust her words. But either way, maybe I was wrong in that situation.

But even when I try to sound nice and say it in the nicest tone I can muster, they still misunderstand me. I remember I was about to go on a walk, my dad came up to me being like "can I join?" and I basically said "I kinda want to be alone right now, sorry..." And I didn't even sound upset, cause I wasnt. I even used a nicer tone than usual. My dad acted like he was fine when I apologized after, because I could tell he wasn't happy with my answer. But, when I got home, I heard him complaining to my mom about how rude I was. I feel like nothing works here. If I am not honest, I am uncomfortable. When I am honest, I make others unhappy and therefore myself, because now they're not happy, and it makes me feel bad. This is not even with massive things. These are just small things but they (or ig my dad) gets offended by it. What happens if something big happened and I expressed my true feelings about it, would I offend them? So I dont know if I am in the wrong or not. Is it my fault? Am I communicating it wrong? Am I being too sudden about it? Should I just pretend I'm okay with it again and was never uncomfortable and this was just some short edgy phase of mine?

Like I get being a bit disheartened, but he gets so offended by it that it makes me feel bad because its not my intention to hurt anybody. But even when I explain after (which I did for the walk thing too), he still makes me feel bad for it. He even makes small comments now. He believes I'm being defensive or something. I dunno. I just wish I lived alone so I don't have to deal with people at almost every moment. It'll probably make it easier for them and me. Anyways now idk what to do.

Hello, I am about to graduate hs and I used to know what I want to do but now I am not so sure. I applied to illustration and psychology, got accepted into both, and idk what to pick. I always wanted to go into illustration, I planned for it my entire life, but recently I got into psychology and I was kinda leaning towards that for a bit.

The reason why I am so conflicted is that I always wanted to go into art, I prepared my whole life for that. I liked the idea of visualizing the stories in my head down on paper. Or maybe inspiring or envoking feelings in people with my work. But, I cant even remember the last time I drew for myself, nonetheless fully enjoy it because I put too much expectations on myself. But I also dont know if I'm picking psychology because it has more career paths (the program I am going into offers co-op ) and it is a safer option. Then yet again, people say you wont get a job with a psych degree so it makes me feel a little more lost lol. I mean, I wont get a job with illustration either lmao. Or any degree, really, business, stem is all oversaturated here, so I am screwed either way. I like psychology, I find it interesting and believe it can give me insight in life. I feel like I may come out a slightly better person. And I like the idea of helping somebody But, whenever I research it, all I see is negative things so I dunno.

I don't know what option will make me feel fulfilled. It's such a big choice that will impact my life. I'm kinda feeling lost and hopeless, not gonna lie. I know no one knows what will happen in the future, no can really know what the better option is for me, I just want some advice, any advice at this point on what I should pick because I really have no clue what to do.

Even if you didn't respond, thank you for reading and have a nice day/night.