u/Competitive-Tie-6294

I came home from the hospital with a single ovary remaining a year ago today at 36. The rest was taken, plus my appendix and a little bit of my vagina. My surgeon said it was a terrible case of endometriosis. I also had adenomyosis, some small fibroids, a very fluid filled and expanded left tube, a cyst on my enlarged left ovary, and an "aggressive fistula" in my vagina (that my primary somehow didn't see during a pap a few months before?? I'm glad I didn't know, the months leading to surgery would have been even worse). Due to the mess, especially all the work they had to do around my bowels, they kept me in the hospital for the night.

A year later, I just... live my life!! I don't have to think about period supplies, or making sure I don't forget Advil so I don't throw up during my most painful days. In fact I haven't taken Advil in months! For many years before I was taking more than the recommended amount for several days a month to function. I'm not miserable for several days a month and not bleeding for 2 to 3 weeks a month. I'm not painfully bloated from lunch time until the following morning every single day. I no longer have diarrhea every morning after all that bloating. I also have the energy to stay awake all day now. Sex is great and we can have it whenever we want. I can't believe how tiny my scars are.

There are a couple things that aren't totally wonderful; my acupuncturist says I'm still tired, and while my energy levels have improved we both think there's room for improvement. My bowels can still be kind of uncooperative, I've had suspicions over the months that I have endometriosis in the area again. I was hoping that my belly would stay flatter when relaxed, now that I'm not so bloated and my oversized uterus is gone, but it isn't. It was actually flatter in the early days of recovery than it is now, which is very disappointing. I'm exercising more than before surgery, so I thought it would go down or at least stay the same.

These are such small problems in comparison to how exhausted and in pain I was just over a year ago. I am so thankful it's finally over with. My lonely ovary seems to still be working, too, and I don't think perimenopause has started yet. I wish I'd done this as soon as I realized I didn't want kids and saved myself so much misery.

Just a little rant of the silliness of being anti dog in a pro dog world.

I have a hard time making friends. However I seem to be developing a friendship right now, which is exciting but also causing anxiety.

Why? I've come across this person on Facebook and their dog was at their wedding and is in their profile photo.

If this friendship actually becomes something, I'm likely to reveal that I don't like dogs. Not admitting will it have them assuming I'm a dog lover too and I'll have to hang out with the dog. Can't win. Maybe the dog in the picture has passed and they're secretly enjoying the freedom and cleanliness, but I know that's unlikely.

I'm struggling and don't know where to turn. I have a pattern of over thinking and getting carried away with my worries and creating problems that aren't there. I have a really hard time trusting people and myself. I constantly think of worst case scenarios rather than the best. I'm not currently in therapy but when I was, my therapist said this is pretty common in someone who grew up in a highly religious household, which I did.

So, please keep the above in mind when reading the rest of this.

My husband is a child of alcoholics. He has not told me much about it, it upsets him too much, and has said it's a door that will never be opened. He's made very few, short attempts at therapy and declares that it doesn't work.

Most of the time, our relationship is great. We get along so well, we enjoy time together, we have a really nice life. He's affectionate to me at all times. I have a long list of things I love about him.

He drinks every weekend, 3 or 4 strong beers each day of the weekend, starting within minutes of arriving home from work. When we first started dating it was 2 or so. He treats me well throughout, but gets more animated and starts repeating himself and going on monologues. He often has an "upset stomach" on Friday nights/Saturday mornings. He's recently made a new friend who he golfs with on Tuesdays. I firmly believe this friend (the long term boyfriend of one of my best friends) has a true drinking problem. When I see him and my husband together, they drink one beer after another with hardly a break in between. I don't golf, so I don't see how much they drink on the course, but I do know how he comes home: extra animated, annoying, repeating himself, and, if the round has gone badly, angry. He smells strongly of alcohol. Still affectionate with me. He now has an "upset stomach" on some Wednesday mornings. The rest of the week, he doesn't drink alcohol.

So... Is my husband developing a drinking problem? Everything I've written above tells me yes, but with my trust issues, I am doubting myself like crazy. I've never learned how to tell the difference been intuition and anxiety. Am I overthinking again?

Thanks everyone. Sorry this got so long.