Should I (F19) leave my partner (M18)?
Should I leave my boyfriend? Hi guys! I’m new to Reddit and I don’t know where else to go. This post is going to focus on the problems in our relationship but outside of these he has been lovely. We have only been on one date and I do sleep over at his daily and spend majority of my time with him. However he has never yelled at me, called me out of my name, or been mean to me. He is sweet but i genuinely don’t know what to do. So for a bit of backstory we have not been dating long. We were talking for about 3 weeks, I was going over to his dorm, sleeping over (in the same bed and letting him hold me ) and we even kissed before I was his girlfriend. He asked me to be his girlfriend a week ago and I obviously said yes. I personally believe he asked me because he had been acting weird, I ignored him and had a good time the following day, knowing that he had seen me and my friends. Besides that we have been having issues already. The first one being that his reposts on TikTok were very weird. There were some pertaining to being happily single, “fumbling” someone and how he will always feel bad about it/sorry about it. Admittedly it takes a bit for me to open up but upon seeing these, I was upset and confused. Before I could bring the issue to him, I went back to his profile and the reposts had been removed, so to me that was confirmation that he knew it was wrong. We discussed the issue and he said he had reposted it because in the moment it “felt relatable/real or like something he should repost”. The following day things were still off but we quickly talked in person and he said he trying to learn how to love a woman right and be in a healthy relationship. For further context his previous relationship was about a year long, he is White and I am mixed (Black, white, Hispanic) he also told meI am the first black girl he has ever dated/talked to. He did reassure me and tell me that I’m not just an experiment or something. The second issue was when I was walking to class and he was walking from class. I had an exam to get to but i stopped to talk to him though he was with his friends. He didn’t kiss or even touch me and proceeded to call me bro. I kept my composure and kept the conversation short. He did ask if I wanted to go somewhere with them and I declined and used the exam as an excuse. We again talked later and he said he didn’t know how to approach me because the relationship was new and he calls everyone bro. The next issue started last night. He opened his phone and I saw that he had me labeled as my name with the hand heart emojis,I jokingly said “wow so I’m just (my name) to you” and he said that he doesn’t have any emojis next to anyone’s name or have them saved as any but their name which is untrue because I’ve seen the contacts in his phone. However in an attempt to (I presume) lighten the mood he (in front of me) changed my name to “my GF (my name)” with the same emoji. I told him he wasn’t funny and that it’s deeper than “just a name”. He proceeded to shut me down. After that, while we were laying in bed I know it’s wrong but I thought about how my (very toxic and horrible) ex also had to be talked to multiple times before changing it and started to compare similarities between the two. I also told him we would talk in the morning because I wanted to sleep on it (to see if I was just being dramatic) and I still felt the same in the morning. Spoiler alert:I did. His friends from back home drove in today so I already knew I wouldn’t be seeing him today. I also ended up leaving early because he wanted to start getting ready because his friends were on the way to come see him. I did talk to him about it later and he claimed to have changed my contact name in front of me to something different (I don’t remember this) but he also said that it is that deep to him. So that brings me to the most recent issue. These friends that drove to come see him, he refers to them as his family. As far as I know, there are two girls apart of this group and he calls them his sisters. For context, a few days ago I told him he should put his hair in a ponytail because it’s gotten long, he made a face, laughed it off and said he would never do that. Last night we made plans to go somewhere next weekend that neither of us had been, just me and him. Well today, he not only went with his friends, but I checked his instagram story and it was a video someone else had taken of him and in the video someone had put his hair into a ponytail. He clearly had no clue the video was being taken, he was caught in a separate conversation with another one of his friends laughing. On top of all this, it was understood that I would not be sleeping over at his dorm because his friends were supposed to be sleeping there. He in fact is sleeping at a hotel with his friends about an hour away and texted me goodnight though he is still active on all social media. I don’t know if anyone will see this but though he has been lovely and has even told me he loves me and has never felt this way about anyone I can’t help but to think that if there’s problems this soon into the relationship…is that a sign?