u/Complex-Shower419

I came across an older video from Candance Owens and she was ranting how men today are too emotional. She gave the example of her grandfather not crying as funerals and that men should bottle it, always.

Now like probably everyone here I bottle up my emotions. I get that’s how things are. But I hate when women tell men because it’s for their sake and not men’s.

Also we have to deal with women’s emotional outbreaks all the time. Whether it’s temper tantrums, crying, pettiness, etc. I have a coworker who cries all the times, threatens to quit and she gets her way. If a guy shows anger he gets fired.

But I can’t. I don’t want to create offsprings that are going to suffer severely and I have very limited control.

I do envy people that see a reason

I joined a Christain cult in 2012 after high school.

In 2008 I began to the Bible, repent, and truly ny life changed for the positive! That two year period of 2008-2009 was the most peaceful in my life.

I kept going forward. In 2010 I was afraid I committed the unforgivable sin from intrusive thoughts that I couldn’t control. I kept searching answers online and 2 years later I joined this group although entirely virtual. I never spoke to family or friends about my struggles with these thoughts because I thought it was too disturbing.

They are into public confessions. I confessed a bunch of personal info on Facebook. I was chastised publicly. I had to submit my prophet.

I only lasted two years. I hated the public confessions. I wanted to experience my youth. I was lonely. I seemed to be an unflavored member. I left in bitterness with the experience and God.

Still years laterI haven’t forgotten about this experience. There hasn’t been a day I’ve thought about it in some way. Likely because life has been lonely

My first public outburst was 14 years ago to this date. And after all these I’ve never had such an urge to reach out again. I looked up their website for the first time since 2014 last week and have been reading it for a few days. I can’t stop. It’s like I’m living in the past and present all at once, it strange.

But I don’t expect I would be accepted. I found out I was gay and have been dating post this experience. They would likely make it public on their site and Facebok page. They made a whole website dedicate to one member’s ex wife and publicly exposing her sins.