u/ConsistentFeedback47

These are the words they told me last week. They don’t know how long it will take to be fixed. Dday was last December (ONS).

I trickle truth & a second DDay was in September of this year.

There’s been no sex since July, weeks of no touch, kissing, letting me in their day.

When I ask if it’s better if I leave? No response

When I ask if they want to cut ties? No response

They’re still processing their thoughts. We still live together. They still wear their ring. They’re super vigilant about my behavior and whether I’m present mentally vs physically

The uncertainty is killing me, but not more than what I’ve done to them

Looking for honest opinions from people who have navigated this.

Quick background: Military spouse in Vicenza Italy. PCS’d here a few months ago from a $90K role in Alabama. Had to start over from scratch professionally.

Here is where I am right now:

Currently working intermittent at the Exchange making $20.60 an hour with no guaranteed hours, nights, weekends, and no benefits. Just accepted a full time federal contractor offer as a Verifying Official supporting DEERS and RAPIDS operations on the installation. Starts September 1st. $17.39 an hour, Monday through Friday, full benefits, 401k, two weeks PTO, 11 paid holidays.

The monkey branch question is this:

Is it wrong to take the contractor role knowing I have active applications in for GS-9 paying $63K plus COLA, GS-5 positions at two different DHA clinics, and I am also exploring going back to active duty or the reserves?

I am not trying to burn bridges. I genuinely need stable income and the Exchange intermittent schedule is not sustainable. But I know that if a GS-9 or active duty opportunity comes through in the next few months I am taking it without hesitation.

Is this just how career progression works when you are a military spouse constantly adapting to new locations? Or is there an ethical line somewhere when you know going in that a job is temporary?

Is monkey branching jobs in this situation just smart career management or is there something I am missing?

Looking for honest opinions from people who have navigated this.

Quick background: Military spouse in Vicenza Italy. PCS’d here a few months ago from a $90K role in Alabama. Had to start over from scratch professionally.

Here is where I am right now:

Currently working intermittent at the Exchange making $20.60 an hour with no guaranteed hours, nights, weekends, and no benefits. Just accepted a full time federal contractor offer as a Verifying Official supporting DEERS and RAPIDS operations on the installation. Starts September 1st. $17.39 an hour, Monday through Friday, full benefits, 401k, two weeks PTO, 11 paid holidays.

The monkey branch question is this:

Is it wrong to take the contractor role knowing I have active applications in for GS-9 paying $63K plus COLA, GS-5 positions at two different DHA clinics, and I am also exploring going back to active duty or the reserves?

I am not trying to burn bridges. I genuinely need stable income and the Exchange intermittent schedule is not sustainable. But I know that if a GS-9 or active duty opportunity comes through in the next few months I am taking it without hesitation.

Is this just how career progression works when you are a military spouse constantly adapting to new locations? Or is there an ethical line somewhere when you know going in that a job is temporary?

Is monkey branching jobs in this situation just smart career management or is there something I am missing?

Hello,

It’s been a long 7 months of spiraling, anxiety, depression, and any other feeling you can think of since we got orders OCONUS. I’ve been in the job hunt every single day since we found out last October. I joined all of the Reddit groups, Facebook groups, and whatever I could to get recon on the area. It was all bad..

Well I’ve been in county for about 2 weeks and I found a job! I’ve also interviewed for multiple GS positions & I’m waiting on hearing back, but it’s been a journey. You have to drop your expectations for payment initially, I went from a 90K role to making 20 bucks an hour.. but this has sparked something in me, and I believe it can be done. I know I will climb my way up the ranks to find something comparable to what I left & even more. It’s the fact that I’ve heard nothing but doom & gloom and that consumed me.

But thru God & Christ all things are possible. This wasn’t anything overnight. It wasn’t magic. I just didn’t stop.

Hey,

I’m a Guard soldier. My wife is active duty. We’re going to Vicenza this summer. I ETS in August & plan on joining the reserve after (the Guard is notorious for not letting ppl out of Death Row records)

Are there any units in Italy I can drill with?

Thanks!

I’ve made a few posts in here before. We found out about Italy last October. I went thru every step of grief from denial, bargaining, anger, sadness, to acceptance

Reason being is I have a great career where we are. My job won’t allow remote work but I have a LOA, so it will be there when I get back

I’ve applied to countless remote roles (all rejected) and I’ve applied to roles on post. I interviewed for one at the dental clinic in Vicenza in March (GS6) They’re still in the “selection phase”. I was just referred to the hiring manager for another role, GS11.

I’ve also started a business that meets the SOFA requirements. My question is this:

Is this timeline normal for GS roles? We land in June & I’ve been very proactive with this change.. okay that’s all