u/Constant_Position_10

I recently interviewed for an entry-level Correctional Officer position and received a conditional offer pending a drug screen and background check.

During the interview, I was upfront about having a misdemeanor that is eligible for expungement next year. The lieutenant told me they have hired people with more serious records, so I’m hopeful it won’t be a major issue. My record has limited some employment opportunities, so this may be one of the best options available to me right now.

A little about me: I’m a veteran, around 275 lbs, and I work out 3–4 times per week. I also hold a bachelor’s degree, an MS, and an MBA, all in business-related fields. They asked for my transcripts and DD-214 during the interview, which makes me think there may be opportunities for advancement once I get my foot in the door.

I completed a one-hour shadow and felt comfortable with the environment. Most of what I observed involved monitoring inmates, supervising movement, and maintaining security. While I understand corrections can be dangerous and mentally demanding, the role seemed manageable based on what I saw.

What appeals to me about this opportunity:

* Stable government employment

* Competitive pay and benefits

* Potential student loan forgiveness

* Pension and retirement benefits

* Opportunities to move into case management, probation/parole, or other state roles

My main concerns:

* Mental stress, burnout, and work-life balance

* Safety and the risk of violence

* A 45-minute to 1-hour commute each way

* Long shifts that could reduce family time significantly

I’m not afraid of confrontation if it happens, but I want to be realistic about the dangers and long-term impact of this career.

For current or former correctional officers:

* Was the job worth it for you?

* How dangerous is the job in reality?

* How does the mental stress compare to the physical risk?

* Is corrections a good stepping stone to other careers?

* Are state prisons more dangerous than county jails or federal prisons?

* Which system (state, county, or federal) offers the best pay, safety, and opportunities for advancement?

* Would you accept this opportunity if you were in my situation?

I’d really appreciate any honest advice or personal experiences before I make my final decision.

I have a 1-year-old daughter, and her mother has been very inconsistent with communication over the past several months.

We communicated more during her pregnancy in 2024 than we have recently. After our daughter was born, things were going well. I live in a different state, and whenever I visited my daughter, I would drive 2–3 hours each way to spend time with her. Despite the distance, I consistently made the effort to be involved in her life. None of the visits were court-ordered, and we never involved the courts because we were successfully managing bi-monthly visits on our own.

After my daughter’s first birthday in November, things changed. We had agreed to keep the celebration simple with cake, ice cream, and a few people, but her mother ended up doing something completely different and did not invite me or any members of my family.

Since then, I’ve reached out through text messages, phone calls, and FaceTime to arrange visits, but she has largely ignored me.

Around Easter 2026, while I was in the hospital dealing with an illness, I called and left multiple voicemails explaining that I still wanted to come see my daughter. She received the calls and messages but continued to ignore my attempts to contact her.

The only time she responded was through a TextNow number (or another temporary number). During that conversation, she refused to let me see my daughter and threatened to call the police and turn the situation into a legal matter if I showed up.

I’m not trying to create unnecessary conflict. I’ve been respectful of her space and have avoided showing up unannounced because I don’t want a confrontation or police involvement. I simply want to be part of my daughter’s life and continue making the effort to travel across state lines to see her.

How should I proceed?

1. Show up anyway and try to see my daughter

2. File through Friend of the Court and establish a formal custody/parenting time order

3. Walk away and stop trying

I have a 1-year-old daughter, and her mother has been very inconsistent with communication over the past several months.

We communicated more during her pregnancy in 2024 than we have recently. After our daughter was born, things were going well. I live in a different state, and whenever I visited my daughter, I would drive 2–3 hours each way to spend time with her. Despite the distance, I consistently made the effort to be involved in her life. None of the visits were court-ordered, and we never involved the courts because we were successfully managing bi-monthly visits on our own.

After my daughter’s first birthday in November, things changed. We had agreed to keep the celebration simple with cake, ice cream, and a few people, but her mother ended up doing something completely different and did not invite me or any members of my family.

Since then, I’ve reached out through text messages, phone calls, and FaceTime to arrange visits, but she has largely ignored me.

Around Easter 2026, while I was in the hospital dealing with an illness, I called and left multiple voicemails explaining that I still wanted to come see my daughter. She received the calls and messages but continued to ignore my attempts to contact her.

The only time she responded was through a TextNow number (or another temporary number). During that conversation, she refused to let me see my daughter and threatened to call the police and turn the situation into a legal matter if I showed up.

I’m not trying to create unnecessary conflict. I’ve been respectful of her space and have avoided showing up unannounced because I don’t want a confrontation or police involvement. I simply want to be part of my daughter’s life and continue making the effort to travel across state lines to see her.

How should I proceed?

1. Show up anyway and try to see my daughter

2. File through Friend of the Court and establish a formal custody/parenting time order

3. Walk away and stop trying