u/Corbin_Riley

[Verse 1]

A wish of an end to come faster

Reminiscing on times that no longer exist

In my sleep I stir

Waiting for my wish to come true

My head in a constant state of blue

Wishing forever to our master

[Pre chorus]

My hope out of water, gasping for air

Music in my ear, an ungodly blare

Silence around me screaming

[Chorus]

"Free me!" I scream as an order

To others, wish me a violent end,

an end I am worthy of

"Free me!"

"Free me!"

Why won't I be freed of the tight border

[Verse 2]

Are you scared,

to give me what I deserve?

Should I do it myself

Or with the help of you

I do not desire your empathy or forgiveness

I only want your hatred

[Verse 3]

"Make other friends,

They will forgive you,"

My creator tells me

I can only imagine their ends

I never pay back their lends

[Chorus]

"Free me!" I scream as an order

To others, wish me a violent end,

an end I am worthy of

"Free me!"

"Free me!"

Why won't I be freed of the tight border

[Bridge]

Free me, master

Free me, father

Free me, mother

Free me, to myself

[Chorus]

Free me!" I scream as an order

To others, wish me a violent end,

an end I am worthy of

"Free me!"

"Free me!"

Why won't I be freed of the tight border

[Outro]

I deserve it

I deserve it

I will always deserve it

(I have a vision of this being very instrumental, kinda like Ethel Cain's "tempest")

​

[Chorus]

I make them sick

I never wanted them to feel so

Was only a small trick

I cut them too deep, only a nick

[Verse 1]

They wish for my demise in pain

Saying "Leave, don't come back"

My fate driving into their lane

Our fates arguing till death

If they wish me gone, I will abide

A will full of disgust and strain

[Verse 2]

Years worth of unknown,

How we've all outgrown each other

Blow the balloon until it can no more

I never watch my own tone, nor their own

[Chorus]

I make them sick

I never wanted them to feel so

Was only a small trick

I cut them too deep, only a nick

[Bridge]

Why must I live in this way?

Is it only because they do

Or do I have the ability to change by the day

[Chorus]

I make them sick

I never wanted them to feel so

Was only a small trick

I cut them too deep, only a nick

[Verse 3]

I drop them like flies from my continuance

Always filled with regret and remorse after

Drip, drop, they fall

Some prance in joy, some begin to ask

When they fall, I trip into a trance

[Outro]

Never mean to hurt

But monthly, ends in a way of hate

With loneliness, I flirt

[Verse 1]

We love it, don't we?

The thrill of death and the sadness of life

Waves of happiness needing to be satisfied

Tides of depression attributing to our ends

With love or hate, we depart

This realm gives us life then kills us like no other

But we love it, even the ones who claim not

Flowers, we leave like a bee

[Pre chorus]

The smart research our beginning

In an effort to live forever

To defy what we internally yearn for

The bee, its will full of sting

[Chorus]

Who do we fight for to live eternally

When we look out to the endless,

Do we see one or many

[Verse 2]

Strength of the divine

Look to it to cure your worry, they say

The officials of life make their decree

Live and die, born to die like a line

The corpse feeds the living around it

A cycle to always repeat, so why be afraid?

We feed the pine

[Verse 3]

fights will not prevail

Animals around make agreements with the earth

They give, and receive their rewards

Hear Gaia, she speaks upon her subjects

Us shown to the cycle, beyond the veil

[Chorus]

Who do we fight for to live eternally

When we look out to the endless,

Do we see one or many

[Outro]

Acceptance is of grief, though the end

Built to end,

Toys full of faulty mechanics

To the veil, we must bend

Heaven hold me

Tell me how to live

Instruct my life like a doll and strings

Heaven, hold the wheel so I may not swerve

Give me the strength of a tree

-

"Go forth," He says unto thee

"Take my words and wisdom,

Trust in me with your heart and mind"

He does not hear my plea

-

Heal me, take me, tell me

Heal me, take me, tell me

Heal me, take me, tell me

-

Our father hears us not

The trust I have in him dwindling

Our lives like crop to him,

Once ripe, plucked and ended

Our pleas for him, always caught

-

Heal me, take me, tell me

Heal me, take me, tell me

Heal me, take me, tell me

-

"A sin is the rule and the way,"

My pastor orders, though he does not obey

Why should I ask, if they will be thrown

Why should I care, if no care is given

Death is the ultimate pay

-

Take me to the church, heal me inside

Tell me the reason and rhyme

Help me understand his ways

Resolve my cries of a dreadful life

Give me knowledge so big, like a tide

-

Heal me.

Take me.

Tell me.

Why did I win the race of life?

Would I loose on purpose if I knew the cost

If I didn't loose my memory of the decade

My existence holding me by a knife

Racing makes way for a bloodline

Our need and want for life to continue

Does it sicken you the way it does me?

None of our history is new

"Race strong and hard" it tells us

Does it know there is an end?

Does it know what we crave?

How could it give us this power,

And also take it away

It tells us not to fuss

Shooting our shot

Racing without reason

The short time we're given a prison

Pleasing the cycle until we've ran out of fucks to give

Our lives tied like a knot

I ask of you to release me

Unto this world of niceties

Into your host, to please me

Let me roam without care

Open your mind to me

We can be a pair

Please me

Please me

Repair yourself and please me

A mechanic at his station

Working hard to fix what is meant to be

Do not fix what is meant to be

Do not flee

Do not tremble at the knees

Please me

Do not flea from me

Please me

Let me understand you

I can show you freedom without consequence

Let go

I will wear you as a shoe,

While you hang to me like a koala

Will you cry for help?

These thoughts are not new for you

Please me

I slip out when no one is near

Waiting, watching from the yard of your mind

The fence of steel and twelve feet high

Someday the end will be near

You try to erase me

But I am you, only trapped behind your tongue

You treat me like dung, a piece meant for a beetle

I am you

I am you

We are meant to be

You are meant to me

Would I take it back?

Would I do it all over again?

Would it change the way you look at me

Your eyes still wondering, "why wouldn't you take it back"

All I wanted to tell you,

All I ever wanted to say,

All I've dreamt of,

To tell you I'm sorry

It was a decision without thought,

Given to me without empathy

Given only to hurt like I've been shot

You kept asking,

Kept wondering

Even without a response

Until at last, you stopped

I didn't want to hurt you

Only to help you

To tell you I'm sorry, that my mind remains only on you

Like a deer,

Drawn to the headlights

My mind finding you so easily

The fear, a car driving full speed with the driver not knowing how to steer

To tell you I'm sorry would be a gift to my own mind

But a promise full of lies to yours

Would a sorry be unkind?

(I want to preface this by saying I know this isn't all grammatically correct and I'm sorry)

Heaven

Heaven is to humans as water is to a tree

Without water, the tree dies

Death

But what without death, what would be to converse of for heaven

Heaven

God rallies his greatest

Ends the ones whom he finds new to inquiry

Will Heaven ratify our lives?

Or will it disembowel our dying wishes

Heaven

Could God allow this time to pass as though it had never occured

Could God sacrifice me only to raise me again

Could God allow me to save the others as if they are my own blood

Heaven

What would God say?

What would God lay his eyes on?

What would Heaven allow me to feel?

Hell

Would Hell be kinder

Does non-life retain it's feel when in death

Would Hell allow for loneliness or for happiness

Heaven

Heaven tells to obey,

Heaven tells to abide by ruling

Hell is for the damned

Hell is for the curious who defy the words of God

Hell

Heaven

Hell

Heaven

Hell

Heaven

Hell

God, who is mighty

God, who is all knowing

God, who is all loving

God

Would God feel the way I do

Could Satan explain to do better

Would God seal my conscious

Could Satan free it

Heaven

Our father, who art in Heaven

Shall someday feel

Shall someday understand

The bread given, poisoned by his malice

Heaven