If you read my last post on the subject, you will notice that I was debating whether or not to let myself like this girl at my church, and suffice to say after y'all telling me to let myself start crushing on her... EXACTLY WHAT I SAID WOULD HAPPEN STARTED HAPPENING.
Once I get a crush, it’s kind of like opening a dam with a bunch of water behind it. It’s easy to start, but it’s really hard to stop.
Seriously, the more I think about it, the more of my boxes she checks.
I want a girl with some sort of special interest?
BOOM, she’s an amazing artist.
Ok well maybe she likes different anime than I do...
NOPE. That matches too. (Jojo is peak and you can't change my mind)
I’ve always had a thing for tomboys...
Lo and behold she’s got a bit of a tomboyish streak.
She’s a good musician, our conversations flow so naturally (all platonic so far), she’s a massive nerd, and she’s so cool and I will LITERALLY DO A TRIPLE BACKFLIP OFF THE EMPIRE STATE BUILDING IF SHE DOESN’T LIKE ME BACK (jk lol).
Literally the only issue with her is she’s 5 years older than me (I’m 20, she just turned 25), but even that has mostly resolved itself because I tend to act a lot older than my age, and she acts a bit younger than her age, so it all evens out to us being in the exact same headspace 99% of the time.
She checks all my boxes.
But I have almost 0 idea if I check any of hers.
The only ones I can tell are:
She’s single (obviously or else I wouldn’t be fiending for this girl)
We are both Christians (fundamental alignment in worldview)
She doesn’t want kids, and I also don’t want kids
And that’s it as far as I can tell.
Outside of a lot of shared interests, I don't know:
If I’m her type physically
If she’d even see me as a romantic option
If she’s just a sociable person, and the platonic chemistry so far is just me being delusional and she’s like that with everyone.
And I think that’s what’s driving me nuts, because on paper this feels almost too good to be true, but in practice I have no clue whether any of this is mutual or if I’m just building castles in the sky
I will take any sort of advice here. She's pretty much all I can think about lately, and after spending like 3 hours after church today just yapping with her and loving every second of the conversation, it just solidified in my head that I am truly...irredeemably...down bad for this girl.