r/Crushes

I feel like I like her but I'm not sure I really do.

Hello,

After a few months on a job and speaking with people briefly,I ended up speaking with a female coworker, I just opened up to her about my divorce, turns out she is also a divorcee.

We were talking about managing subordinates and how to approach documenting a bad apple.

After talking a little shop she complimented me on my work ethic and mentioned how much I deliver. I didn't think anything of it.

We also each have our own kids nearly the same age, another similarity.

I give her full attention and eye contact when we speak, she does the same. Our conversations do not involve work anymore but instead it's about our lives and things we enjoy. I don't know if I'm being humored but she smiles warmly and does small things to help me out in her department.

I like this woman, she wasn't my type until we started speaking and when I felt like we had similarities, and did small things like help me out and join me for lunch, it made my head spin and I cannot get enough of her.

We still enjoy warm conversations today , Ive been into her since June

Im quite a bit older than her maybe 10 years or more.

I want to shoot my shot ,for some reason I feel like this is "nothing ventured nothing gained.

Last time I was limerent over a coworker we got married. Everything played out in my head became reality.

Im uncertain.

He might be gay.

I made a post not too long ago about this same girl named Harper, today, I wrote a note saying “Are you single?

Yes no

O O

But, I was nervous to go up there and give it to her because she was with some other girls, so, I asked my friend to get his girlfriend to give her the note, she did, she looked at my table, I was nervous so I looked away, that was in lunch btw, in 6th period she finally figured out who it was that wrote the note, then while we were waiting for our teacher she dropped it on the floor kinda close to me, my friend picked it up and read it then said, “I don’t know if you wanna read this man” so I didn’t but my friend said that she called me ugly and disgusting and that was the least bad stuff she said about me, so as I expected, I got more than just rejected and now I will probably never date someone unless they ask me first, but I’ll still be kinda paranoid from past experience.

I confessed, asked if he wanted to hang and he’s seeing someone…. I’m trying to move on and he won’t leave me be!!! Keep coming up talking to me and wants to interact and say hi all the time!!

Every time I feel like I wasn’t wrong and have to redirect to reality of his unavailability. Spiral back into crushing and feeling silly.

Uncool.

Yesterday I was walking down the hallway and I see her coming the opposite way towards me and she does a fakeout like she's going to walk into me lol. Have you ever done stuff like that with your crush.

Me: “Yk I like u right?”

Him: “I mean yea”

Him: “I liked my seniors too”

Me: “No I’m serious”

Me: “It’s fine if u don’t feel the same, I just wanted to express my feelings”

Him: “Um I understand”

Him: “You act really mature”

Me: “Rightt but I kinda need to work on my impulse”

Me: “Sorry if it made things awkward”

Him: “It’s good to be impulsive sometimes”

Him: “Na it’s alright”

This is the conversation we had and yep I did it over text cus he's a senior who graduated. So idk what to feel about this cus he never directly gave an answer. Now we r normally talking as if nothing happened but I want clarification. Idk what to do or feel about this 😭

Heya. Not gonna waste your time with too many details, but last night a guy I met a couple weeks ago and I pretty much admitted our crushes to each other over messages. He said I was cute, I said the same about him, among other things. We were very affectionate in general. All of this is great, but he didn't really ask me to be his girlfriend, and I feel like I need that kind of confirmation before I move further. So, that puts me in the awkward position of wanting him to ask me out and trying to communicate that. He did say at one point "I hope I'm not being too forward," which is ironic considering "forward" is exactly what I want/need.

Is there a way I can say I want him to ask me out, without just asking him out myself? I'm willing to bite that bullet if that's what it takes, it's just not my preference. I don't have a lot of experience with this.

Hey guys. I am a high school sophmore student. This is quite a sticky situation so I am going to fill youy in on a lot of context details. So the situation is this:

I liked a girl, 8 months ago. But hse had a BF then, so she told me to stop texting her (like I was messaging abt hw and all, trying to start light convo since I didnt know she had a bf at the time) I then got blocked for reasons still unknown to me. I just got to know that she broke up 2 months ago. Now here is the sticky situation. I made up that I had a gf about 2 months ago, aorund the same time that she broke up. a week ago, when some girls were discussing who were all the boys who were having a gf (dont even as why), my name came up. My crush then apparently got very surprised, and was visibly dissapointed. One of her friends say that there was a tinge of jelasousy as well ( i cant spell the word.) Now if this is true, then I would definitley go for here agian. What brekaup story (with my imaginary gf) would you suggest, and how long to wait untill I make a move? (we share only one class; french. btw)

Okay, this is probably going to be long, so grab some popcorn because I apparently cannot tell a story without writing an entire academic paper first.

I've had a crush on this guy for about two years.

When I transferred to my school, I enrolled pretty late, so I was basically the new person while everyone else already knew each other. I'm pretty much an ambivert, so I went around introducing myself and trying to make friends.

Then I met him.

I'm VERY into smart/nerdy people. Like, stereotypical nerds, techy people, people who can talk about random things for hours. He seemed like that type, so I approached him and started asking him things like his hobbies, whether he played games, watched anime, etc.

And we clicked. Like, REALLY clicked.

At first, I didn't actually have a crush on him. I just really liked his personality.

Eventually, we both became the "smart people" that classmates went to for different things. He's really good academically, while I'm pretty decent at math, public speaking, philosophy, etc. So we'd help each other with schoolwork.

Except our conversations somehow always turned into debates.

Not actual arguments. More like:

"That's not what I meant."

"Yes, but logically..."

"No, because—"

"Okay, but consider this..."

And then we'd both start laughing.

Our classmates noticed and started teasing us whenever we debated.

"Are you guys arguing again?"

"Why do you sound like a married couple?"

And that's basically where I started developing feelings.

He's responsible, intelligent, funny, and honestly just my type.

There were also two girls who had been close friends with him for years, so my friends told me to figure out whether there was something going on between them before I did anything.

Person A didn't seem interested in guys, and Person B already had a boyfriend, so I eventually stopped worrying about that.

Then one day he invited me to a movie with some friends because we both wanted to see the same movie. I invited one of my friends because I was nervous, and he brought some of his friends too.

After the movie, my friend had to leave, so I ended up hanging around with him and his friends. We explored the mall, looked at figurines, talked about random stuff, and honestly had a really fun time.

We got closer after that.

Then came the competitions and stuff.

One of my popular friends started liking him too.

Girl code kicked in, so I backed away.

I told myself I didn't like him that much anyway. I convinced myself that I only admired him because he was smart.

I also had another guy I was close to, so let's call him Penguin.

Penguin and my crush actually had similar vibes. Both nerdy, into anime, etc. Penguin was also into Korean stuff, which I liked, and we were on the debate team together, so we spent a lot of time around each other.

Eventually, everyone started shipping me and Penguin so hard that I felt pressured to do something.

So during Christmas break, I confessed to Penguin.

I gave him a letter and some chocolates. Basically, I told him that I really admired him, liked his personality, and hoped we'd stay friends regardless of what happened.

He accepted it, and nothing really changed between us.

But here's where things get interesting.

Before I confessed to Penguin, I actually asked my original crush for advice.

I told him I wanted to confess to someone and asked what I should do.

And he started questioning me.

"Are you sure you're not suppressing your feelings?"

"Are you sure you actually like this person?"

"You've never confessed to the other person, so how do you know what you would've felt?"

I kept insisting that my original crush would reject me anyway.

I literally said something along the lines of:

"No. He wouldn't like me. He rejected that other girl, so there's no way."

And my crush was like:

"Are you sure? You never asked him."

Then, when I was talking about this mysterious person I liked, he jokingly asked:

"Are you sure it's not me?"

And I PANICKED.

I immediately said no and promised it wasn't him.

Except... it kind of was.

After that, we kept getting closer anyway.

We worked on a musical theater project together. We went to academic competitions together. We talked a lot. We debated constantly.

At one point, we were talking about relationships, and he said something like he wasn't interested in dating unless it was something serious, basically "I'm not dating just to date. If I'm with someone, I want it to actually go somewhere."

I agreed because honestly, same.

We also talked about our futures because we're both interested in medical-related careers.

Then we had to choose our specialization for the next school year.

I was considering Pharmacy, Caregiving, and MedTech. He was considering the same general options.

I didn't want to choose something just because my friends were choosing it, because this specialization would affect what I wanted to do later.

Eventually, I chose Pharmacy.

He initially chose Caregiving because most of our classmates were pressuring him to choose it. But apparently he wasn't actually sure about it.

He ended up asking the teachers if he could switch to Pharmacy.

And guess who was already in the Pharmacy section?

Me.

Our Pharmacy/Dentistry section was tiny, so it had to be combined. There were only a few people he already knew, including me and some of our friends.

When he found out he'd be in the same section as me, he seemed pretty happy about it.

And now we're here.

We're in the same section again.

We're still close.

We still debate about absolutely everything.

We still make each other laugh.

And unfortunately, I think I still like him.

The problem is that we're graduating soon.

I'm planning to study abroad afterward, so realistically, if I confess and he actually likes me back, we'd probably have to deal with long-distance eventually.

And if he doesn't like me back, I'd obviously have to deal with the awkwardness until graduation.

Part of me thinks:

"Just confess. You'll regret it if you never know."

But another part of me thinks:

"Why potentially complicate a friendship that already means a lot to you?"

Especially because he's already rejected someone before because he wanted to focus on his studies, and I don't want to put him in an uncomfortable position.

So, Reddit, what do you think?

Should I finally tell him after TWO YEARS, knowing that we're probably going separate ways after graduation?

Or should I just keep this as one of those feelings I never act on?

I genuinely can't tell anymore. Genuinely help me guys please lmao cause were almost graduating 😭😭😭✌️

24M, First of all i am no man of experience like i dated a girl once for 4 months a thats it and ive been single ever since and happy about it until now, i was attending the wedding of my cousin and saw a cute girl that i pretty much liked, after little investigation i found out her name and looked up her instagram account.

In a nutshell i want advice from you guys on how can I approach a girl that dont know me (maybe she saw me once or twice) and i dont follow her instagram yet (ps: her account is private, have 0 posts and no pp) and to make things worse she’s traveling in 5 to 10 days

So am i cooked for good? Helpp

Hi friends, I'm in a tricky situation.

So there's this girl I see often at the gym . We've had a few friendly conversations but headphones and different routines makes it near impossible to speak to her in a normal setting. I'm at wits end because I just want to ask her out but it's near impossible to approach unless random chance works out that way.

Would it be too much to add her on IG and try that way?

I really don't want to make her uncomfortable because the gym is sacred and a guy doing this isn't the same as a girl, but this is also getting a little ridiculous now 😅

Thanks and have a good one

My guy best friend and I have been best friends for about two years. Ngl, I think he’s cute, so obviously that makes this whole situation a little more complicated.

When we first became friends, he once told me that he wouldn’t date younger girls. There’s a six-year age gap between us (we’re both adults btw,), so I basically filed that information away and assumed there was nothing romantic there.

However, he does things that could easily be interpreted as romantic gestures, to the point that other people regularly assume we’re dating.

Recently, he’s actually started bringing up the fact that people mistake us for a couple. He says he doesn’t mind being mistaken for my boyfriend, and he’s also mentioned that he’s becoming more open-minded about relationships in general. I’m not sure if I’m reading too much into that or if he’s trying to hint at something.

This past weekend, I visited his city and ended up staying at his house. We had a few glasses of wine and talked until the early hours of the morning. When it was time to sleep, we shared his bed, and he hugged me. We ended up spooning while we slept, and he was being really affectionate with me.

Needless to say, my heart was racing. Now I’m completely confused. On one hand, I feel like there are some pretty obvious signs that he might be interested in me. On the other hand, we’ve been best friends for two years, and I really don’t want to interpret normal affection between close friends as something romantic just because I happen to find him attractive.

Am I reading too much into this, or does this sound like he might actually be interested in me? What signs should I look for before I make myself delulu?

I'm bored with no hope, lol. So tell me what made you like your crush. Like actually like them. Hopefully not just that they're physically attractive, but what drew you to them initially and what kept you pulled in 😊

like i can't stop thinking about him, i always look at him in class, and i legit get butterflies js bc of his name!!! i like hadn't noticed him as someone i liked at first but he started kinda paying attention to me and now i js can't get him off my mind. it pains me! and makes me mad! my friend says she doesn't know what i see in him. she's still supportive tho. but i js can't stop thinking of him and i need to get it off my chest i love him so much!!!!!!

I know we’re both busy, I know there’s people around us, I know we’re at work but god just say something. Say anything say even a hello. I never wanted my actions to be misinterpreted. I never wanted a push and pull dynamic, especially when I have to see you. I know I might look unapproachable but it’s quite the opposite. So please say something not just with your eyes, with the glances but through anything. I’m tired of feeling bad when a customer moves and I make eye contact with you. Even a smile…. Just anything.

I don’t know what to do. I been crushing on the same guy since I started high school. We had similar classes, we had a period together freshman and sophomore year were I would ask him what they did for the period I was going to next because he already had it earlier to the day, that was my excuse to talking to him. I don’t know why I liked him so much when I don’t talk to him that much. We would talk a couple times a week but not a lot lot. We don’t even talk online. I really like his personality and his energy. He’s nice to me and he’s really funny and sweet. (Think of Niccolo from baby(idk if yall watched him, but that similar to his persona)) but he’s not that big of an asshole.I don’t know I feel stupid sometimes because he looks at me with longing eyes but I don’t know if I’m imagining it. Also the schedules and I posted in my story and he replied to it saying we have this and that subject together. That text keeps making me overthinking so much. (We’ve talked max like 3 time on instagram but it was me asking things about a text he’s already taken and nothing else). The girls he dated are the complete opposite of me so I don’t know. Maybe I’m just seeing something that isn’t there and I’m scared to confess because I don’t want to look stupid and get embarrassed and have the whole school finding out.

(I’m typing this at 4 in the morning so it might not make a lot of sense and it might be poorly written.)

So I’m F15 and the guy I have a crush on is M15. I’ll call him J.

So I’ve known J since we were both ten years old. We were never super close but we were definitely friends and talked a lot during school.

This year I kind of developed a crush on him…. And I think he might like me back but I don’t know. I’ll just list some things he’s done and I want to know if I’m looking into things too hard and he’s just nice or he might actually feel the same.

1. Our birthdays are a week apart and mine is almost always during the beginning of spring break. And this year J’s birthday was the we came back from break. Because mu birthday was over spring break J didn’t give me a gift. But in school we celebrated his birthday and in private he gave me chocolate for my birthday (ON HIS BIRTHDAY) and obviously the next day I gave him something for his.
2. We were talking in the beginning of class and he dapped me up (like the handshake kinda thing) but instead of letting go he held my hand for a solid minute until my friend said something and we both let go.
3. I got my braces off and the next day at school not many people noticed. (I only really told a couple people I was) I was talking to one of my friends and J came over and commented on how I got my braces off. (He was the only person that whole day to notice immediately. Even my friends who I told I was getting my braces off didn’t remember)

Those are all the major ones that make me think there maybe is something but I’m not sure. We also text sometimes and we talk almost everyday in school. And we have inside jokes and stuff. I don’t know, just tell me what you think

Dudes are hard to read, especially in this society where we can be labeled as creeps if we show too much interest in women. Here is a guide to straight male boyish men.

We stare at you. We will try to catch your eye. When we do, we might look away immediately, but our gaze will return. If you like a dude try smiling at him and see if he smiles back. If he does you can know that he is comfortable with you. I try to smile at my crush any and every chance I get. It might seem creepy but it is literally might be the only way a dude may communicate with you.

He texts you first - multiple times. If a guy texts you multiple times he most likely is into you. I personally don't text any girl just for the heck of it unless it's my crush or my bestie. Now that I think about it I'm lowkey cooked because I text my crush too much. PLEASE RESPOND TO THEIR TEXTS. If you do not respond we will immediately assume you have no interest. PLEASE DONT BE DRY. I know it's hard but it'll go a long way. Carry the conversation, and maybe text him first yourself. I PROMISE YOU ITLL BE WORTH IT.

If he touches you. Not in like a weird way, but he finds a chance to hold your hand or brush your back he most likely likes you. If he asks to look at your rings and then holds your hand whilst doing so he most definitely likes you. I don't walk up to a random girl and then try and hold their hand.

He teases you/makes fun of you. Kinda contradictory but thats literally how we try and mask a crush. We won't be outright mean, but we will try and poke at you if we like you.

We may ignore you completely. Yup. Even if we are infatuated with you. We could ignore you because we don't know if you like us back. Best way to break the ice is to TALK TO HIM.

If we try to start a random conversation with you. Could literally be the dumbest thing like a bug or what pants to buy. If a dude asks something he is trying to get your attention and interest.

MOST BOYS DONT REALLY TALK WITH GIRLS THEY DONT LIKE UNLESS YOUR ARE VERY GOOD FRIENDS.

Here are some things that guys love and some tips for what you should do

We love it if you talk to us

If you ask us out that takes so much pressure off our shoulders and prevents us from being potentially being labeled as creeps.

Text us first

Get closer to us

Say hi

Compliment us. We will remember it forever. Not a joke. Forever. Even when we are old and and gray and have dementia. We will remember it.

Make an effort. Just try and show interest.

Don't play games. Literally the stupidest thing you could do it's a massive turn off

Not all dudes want sex. Most just want to love someone and have someone to hold and cuddle.

Dudes can be pretty hard to read, I hope this helps.

Also biggest tip: JUST ASK HIM OUT

UPDATE #1: DO NOT SAY ANYTHING MEAN ABOUT A GUY OR RIDICULE HIM. It will literally make him feel worthless and once it is said you can NEVER take it back

If anyone has any questions I'd love to answer them!

(This is a repost from my old account if anyone recognizes it)

What body language from your crush "gets you" the most? The slight finger touch in a random passing of a piece of paper about took me out today with him and I can't dwell on whether the feelings are mutual or not because he's a coworker and I can't act on that. The eye contact is also a big one for me but again, neither of these things happen to a level where I can for sure say. I can't have him anyway but that drives me all the more insane and I already put in a lot of effort not to have my own body language communicate too much either 😮‍💨

Auntie is tired y'all but wanted to let you know it wasn't just you 🤣 and honestly this has ended up being one of my fav groups