u/Curious_Siti2026

How do I deal with my Chinese boss based in London? She wants me to move out of our team and look for another role kasi di daw ako fit, my skills and attitude of being kind, sa role ko as Advisor.
Last Dec. nalaman nyang may cancer ang ama ko. Sinabi nyang she sympathizes with me going on a tough situation but if I underperform she will put me into a PIP. She also offered me to become a part-timer if I really need time to take care sa ama ko. I assured her na I will not let this case affect my job lalo na at breadwinner ako.
March 2026 - she let me have business travel to Poland for our annual team meeting. While eating in a fine dining resto, she told me I need to move out of the team kasi di raw ako fit sa role ko based sa feedback received nya sakin and also need daw ng role na ito nagpupushback at tough attitude. Naiyak ako. Then she told me I can stay with the team but my title needs to change from Advisor to Analyst or Specialist.
April came, andami nyang biglaang calls, emails, and chat sakin for my title and nagkakasleepless night na din daw sya kasi she’s trying to protect me from the stakeholders who provided the feedback. For context last 2025 pa ang feedback and I already worked and improved on that.
May - may kulang na asterisk sa isang reporting slide and she highlighted it during our 1:1 saying na asan na ang attention to detail ko and napapagod na daw sya kakapinpoint ng mistakes ko. Tinanong nya ako if ano daw need kong gawin. After 3-5 mins of silence, sabi ko na I will look for another job. And that is the time na parang sumigla sya ang nagsoften ang tone nya talking with me and told me good that’s what you need to do.
Today she told me her boss did not allow changing my title but she informed him na nagvolunteer daw ako na aalis na ako sa team. And then she told me I really have to look for another team or else i-PIP daw nya ako come July and I will have low performance rating come year-end. Icontinue ko lang daw ang strong performance ko now.
For context, nakaopen na po ang hiring for my boss’ replacement at yung kapalit nya will start July 1. Ongoing pa ang hiring. My boss will stay until Nov to train her replacement and to focus on her project na pending approval of senior leads. She told me na kahit hindi na daw sya ang direct boss ko ikikwento nya daw to my new boss all my past mistakes and who knows daw na mas brutal pa yung new boss at i-fire daw agad ako.
Should I be silent of her harassment to me and what seems like a constructive dismissal and endure until she is gone? I really like my job,yung boss ko lang tlaga ang nagpapahirap sakin. Nagpiperform din po ako and binigyan pa nga ako ng madaming work ng boss ko at napupuri nya din ako sa iba pero halos everyday ay may pinupuna at kinucomment sya na as if naghahanap na lang ng manitpick nya sakin kahit mababaw lang. Should I already tell HR abt this or talk to the boss of my boss? Please help me. As much as possible I only want to work and have peace of mind. I’m so done and I feel I don’t deserve this kind of treatment lalo na at sa company namin core value ang respect for people and kaya nga din ako tumagal dito ng 14 years ay dahil sa magandang culture at treatment sakin, not until I met my boss who changed her treatment to me last Qtr of 2025. I started in this role last Nov 2024 and this was a promotion na long-prayed ko and waited. I really do not want to leave pa but I am being pushed out of my boss. Please help me what should I do? Thank you in advance.

How do I deal with my Chinese boss based in London? I am a Filipina based in the Philippines. She wants me to move out of our team and look for another role because she says I’m not fit for my role as an Advisor, both in terms of skills and my attitude of being kind. We are employed in a multinational company and since we are working remote, we have weekly 1:1 or catch-up.

Last December, she found out that my father has cancer. She told me that she sympathized with what I was going through, but if I underperformed, she would put me on a PIP (Performance Improvement Plan). She also offered to make me a part-timer if I really needed time to take care of my father. I assured her that I would not let my family situation affect my job, especially since I am the breadwinner.

In March 2026, she allowed me to travel to Poland for our annual team meeting. While we were eating at a fine dining restaurant, she told me that I needed to move out of the team because, based on the feedback she received about me, I was not fit for the role. She also said the role required someone who could push back more and have a tougher attitude. She told me I could stay with the team, but my title would need to change from Advisor to Analyst or Specialist.

When April came, she suddenly started calling, emailing, and messaging me frequently about my title. She even said she was losing sleep trying to protect me from stakeholders who had provided feedback about me. For context, the feedback was from 2025, and I had already worked on improving those areas.

In May, there was one missing asterisk on a reporting slide, and she highlighted it during our 1:1 meeting, asking where my attention to detail had gone and saying she was getting tired of constantly pointing out my mistakes. She then asked me what I thought I needed to do. After 3–5 minutes of silence, I told her I would look for another job. That was when she suddenly seemed energized and softened her tone. She told me, “Good, that’s what you need to do.”

Today, she told me that her boss did not approve changing my title, but she informed him that I had volunteered to leave the team. She then told me that I really needed to look for another team, otherwise she would put me on a PIP by July and I would receive a low performance rating by year-end. She also told me to just continue my strong performance for now.

For context, hiring is already open for my boss’s replacement, and the new person will start on July 1. The hiring process is still ongoing. My boss will stay until November to train her replacement and focus on a project that is pending approval from senior leaders. She also told me that even if she is no longer my direct manager, she would still tell my new boss about all my past mistakes. She even said that the new boss might be more brutal and could fire me immediately.

Should I stay silent about what feels like harassment and possible constructive dismissal and just endure it until she leaves? I really like my job — it’s just my boss who is making things difficult for me. I am performing well, and she even gives me a lot of work and praises me to others, but almost every day she finds something to criticize or comment on, as if she is just looking for things to nitpick, even very minor issues.

Should I already tell HR about this or speak to my boss’s manager? Please help me. As much as possible, I just want to work and have peace of mind. I’m exhausted and I feel I do not deserve this kind of treatment, especially since one of our company’s core values is respect for people. The reason I stayed with this company for 14 years is because of the good culture and how well I was treated — not until I met this boss, whose treatment toward me changed during the last quarter of 2025.

I started in this role in November 2024, and this promotion was something I had prayed and waited for for a long time. I really do not want to leave yet, but I feel like my boss is pushing me out.

Please help me. What should I do?

Thank you in advance

How do I deal with my Chinese boss based in London? I am a Filipina based in the Philippines. She wants me to move out of our team and look for another role because she says I’m not fit for my role as an Advisor, both in terms of skills and my attitude of being kind. We are employed in a multinational company and since we are working remote, we have weekly 1:1 or catch-up.

Last December, she found out that my father has cancer. She told me that she sympathized with what I was going through, but if I underperformed, she would put me on a PIP (Performance Improvement Plan). She also offered to make me a part-timer if I really needed time to take care of my father. I assured her that I would not let my family situation affect my job, especially since I am the breadwinner.

In March 2026, she allowed me to travel to Poland for our annual team meeting. While we were eating at a fine dining restaurant, she told me that I needed to move out of the team because, based on the feedback she received about me, I was not fit for the role. She also said the role required someone who could push back more and have a tougher attitude. She told me I could stay with the team, but my title would need to change from Advisor to Analyst or Specialist.

When April came, she suddenly started calling, emailing, and messaging me frequently about my title. She even said she was losing sleep trying to protect me from stakeholders who had provided feedback about me. For context, the feedback was from 2025, and I had already worked on improving those areas.

In May, there was one missing asterisk on a reporting slide, and she highlighted it during our 1:1 meeting, asking where my attention to detail had gone and saying she was getting tired of constantly pointing out my mistakes. She then asked me what I thought I needed to do. After 3–5 minutes of silence, I told her I would look for another job. That was when she suddenly seemed energized and softened her tone. She told me, “Good, that’s what you need to do.”

Today, she told me that her boss did not approve changing my title, but she informed him that I had volunteered to leave the team. She then told me that I really needed to look for another team, otherwise she would put me on a PIP by July and I would receive a low performance rating by year-end. She also told me to just continue my strong performance for now.

For context, hiring is already open for my boss’s replacement, and the new person will start on July 1. The hiring process is still ongoing. My boss will stay until November to train her replacement and focus on a project that is pending approval from senior leaders. She also told me that even if she is no longer my direct manager, she would still tell my new boss about all my past mistakes. She even said that the new boss might be more brutal and could fire me immediately.

Should I stay silent about what feels like harassment and possible constructive dismissal and just endure it until she leaves? I really like my job — it’s just my boss who is making things difficult for me. I am performing well, and she even gives me a lot of work and praises me to others, but almost every day she finds something to criticize or comment on, as if she is just looking for things to nitpick, even very minor issues.

Should I already tell HR about this or speak to my boss’s manager? Please help me. As much as possible, I just want to work and have peace of mind. I’m exhausted and I feel I do not deserve this kind of treatment, especially since one of our company’s core values is respect for people. The reason I stayed with this company for 14 years is because of the good culture and how well I was treated — not until I met this boss, whose treatment toward me changed during the last quarter of 2025.

I started in this role in November 2024, and this promotion was something I had prayed and waited for for a long time. I really do not want to leave yet, but I feel like my boss is pushing me out.

Please help me. What should I do?

Thank you in advance