r/ToxicWorkplace

I (18M) have recently started working for a retail clothing store. My job is to make sure that the section I am assigned to for the day is kept tidy and help customers when needed. I've only worked here for almost 3 weeks and am still pretty new to all of their tidying standards as I've only been doing the tidying stuff for about a week and a half now (all I did before this was put clothes from the fitting rooms back on the shelves and some back of house things like online orders) I know I'm no expert for keeping things tidy as my room is almost always a little bit messy but all I've been told is to make sure it doesn't look like a hurricane just passed through the isles and so I do that and maybe it isn't like a top notch job where everything is folded to the exact dimensions and is evenly spaced out but it at least looks appealing to customers.

I've had this same thing happen on multiple occasions where I need to tidy like 20 different tables or shelves of clothes, and so I do, making sure it doesn't look like a hurricane just went through. Once I'm done, sometimes a customer will mess up a shelf, and I won't notice since I've gone to the fitting rooms to put things away for about 10 minutes, then one of my managers will notice and get mad at me saying I never tidied anything and they will point at the table or shelf that a customer messed up a little and then I will say that I did clean them and that a customer just messed it up a little. I will then always fix the messed-up pieces of clothing and get back to what I was doing before (they also dont show me what it should look like since when they did the one time all the manager told me to do was to make sure it just looks appealing to customers and doesnt look like a hurricanewent through and then showed me a pile that was a little messed up but she said that the pile was good). This next part happened on my most recent shift where one of my managers saw a messed-up table and kinda raised her voice at me, saying that I never tidied the table when I did. This made me embarrassed as we had a fair amount of customers around at this time. later, in my shift, around an hour after this happened, I ran into the same manager who was with one of my other co-workers. i dont remember what was said before this since im still a little shocked it happened, but my manager just flat out said to me that she thinks I'm dumb and an idiot sometimes. My co-worker reacted by covering their mouth and turning around in shock.

Ive started looking at other job opportunities now since then.

If anyone has anything to say, it will be greatly appreciated .

am still in absolute shock and just need to get this out.

I am a graphic designer with over 20 years of experience. After a brutal stretch of unemployment, I finally landed what I thought was a dream senior design role at a major utility cooperative. I went through a rigorous, multi-stage interview process. They offered me the job, authorized a relocation, and I packed up my life and moved from my home state to a completely new city to start over.

I acted in total good faith. I signed a lease on a bare-bones apartment, bought basic necessities to set it up for the work week, and showed up ready to pour everything into this role.

The first week and a half was classic corporate chaos. They didn't even have my working laptop ready for days. Despite the lack of onboarding, I jumped right in. I helped execute a major department project and meeting. My direct supervisor literally texted me afterwards telling me my work was "excellent," "well organized," and "well run." I felt so relieved. I told my family and friends that I loved it here and that this was my fresh start.

Then, at the start of week two, I sent a completely routine, professional email asking a simple logistical question about scheduling flexibility. No demands, just a standard inquiry to plan my workflow.

The next day, I was called into an office. The Chief Communications Officer (the head of the entire department) personally handed me a termination letter. Her reason? "You're just not a good fit."

When she handed it to me, **she actually smiled.** Then she walked away.

They completely upended my life, forced me to incur thousands of dollars in relocation costs and a binding lease, praised my work as excellent, and then threw me away like trash over a routine question after less than 20 days on the payroll.

I’m currently sitting in a half-empty apartment, staring at the things I just bought to build a life here, facing a massive lease-break fee, and trying to process the absolute cruelty of it all. I already hit their HR and executive suite with a formal demand letter for relocation and lease-break restitution, but the emotional whiplash is real.

Please tell me I’m not crazy, because right now my brain is trying to blame myself for a corporate nightmare I had absolutely no control over.

Looking for some perspective on how to handle a highly stressful transition at work.I was recently given a promotion to run a specific shift at a different branch location. Because this advancement happened relatively quickly, it has generated a lot of friction among staff members who have been with the company longer.Since taking on the role, I have encountered an ongoing series of obstacles from both peers and management that feel like a coordinated effort to make me fail.

Inadequate Onboarding: When the role was assigned, I was told to get training from a senior staff member. However, the training consisted of brief, five-minute sessions at a time, and other employees would openly laugh while I was trying to learn.

Administrative Deficits: I received zero formal onboarding regarding the operational rules, software, or opening protocols for the new branch. Less than 24 hours before my first shift, I received a last-minute text message containing basic instructions on how to access the keys and turn on the building's electricity. I had to piece together the entire localized system on my own.

Indirect Criticism: A coworker who used to be friendly has completely shifted his behavior. He has started delivering vague feedback, claiming that other people are complaining about me asking questions, even though management explicitly failed to provide structured training.

Hierarchy Challenges: On my most recent shift, another staff member was assigned to work with me. He immediately began issuing conflicting directives to the part-timers, changing the schedule I put in place, and attempting to take over the floor. When I spoke to him privately and established a clear verbal boundary, he changed tactics and began bypassing me to ask the branch administration basic procedural questions he already knew the answers to, seemingly to highlight my lack of branch-specific training.

Despite the pressure, I am not reacting emotionally or engaging in the drama. I have kept my head down, focused completely on operations, and ensured our cleanliness and performance metrics are met. I have also built an ironclad, dated paper trail of every email, text message, and admission regarding the lack of training.The company owners visit frequently and the floor is monitored by security cameras, so my work is fully documented. However, managing the staff while constantly neutralizing these workplace politics is exhausting.For anyone who has navigated rapid advancement friction, what is the best strategy to protect your role and maintain your peace when the environment turns hostile?

I work in a creative/brand team. I was hired directly by the VP, and about a month after I joined, a colleague was promoted to Brand Director and became my manager. This was not explained when I was hired, and the operating model has felt unclear ever since.
The whole team is based in one country, while my manager works remotely from another. I know remote management can work, but in this case it seems to add distance and make the flow less direct.
In practice, the VP, agencies, and other teams often come directly to me for creative direction, reviews, storyboards, urgent feedback, and strategic work. On several major projects, I have managed the creative side independently and the work has been well received.
The issue is that my manager seems to manage me differently from other people in the team.
When she receives requests, she often keeps me off the original thread, forwards the task separately, replies to stakeholders herself, and remains the gatekeeper between me and the people I need to work with. She decides who I speak to and when.
But when the VP or other teams contact me directly, she wants to know who contacted me, asks to be copied, or wants to be added after the work has already started. She does not seem to apply this consistently to other colleagues.
There are two recent examples:

Example 01: An internal presentation was shared with me because the VP had asked someone to get my quick review. I had already provided feedback when my manager told me that the VP was apparently not expecting me to review it. When I said I had already seen it, she asked who had sent it to me. After learning that the VP had asked for my review, she joked that he had probably “spaced out” when she had asked him.

Example 02: On a separate project, the VP asked me to put her in the loop and show her the current progress and my comments. I asked him whether he wanted to transfer the feedback to the agency himself or wanted me to reply directly. He told me to reply directly, so I did and copied her.

The VP also does not naturally include her on every major project or event. (he does the same thinh with other directors within his team).
Sometimes she hears about a project through contacts in other departments, raises a concern around a small point, and then becomes part of the thread. I understand managers need visibility, but it feels like a repeated pattern: the work is already moving, she enters late, gives limited feedback, and then becomes associated with the outcome.

There is also a workload issue. Another designer is meant to support me, but my manager has assigned him to execute presentation work instead. That work is moving slowly, and the VP has started asking about delays. From where I sit, unclear ownership, too many handoffs, and gatekeeping are making things less efficient.

Our company is currently pushing simpler processes and fewer unnecessary approval layers. At the same time, our CCO has just left, there is an interim setup, and a new CCO may join later.
So the whole function feels politically and structurally ambiguous.

How would you interpret this? Is this normal manager visibility, or does it sound like someone trying to control access and claim visibility around work they are not actually leading?

I'm in a situation where I'm relatively new in the office -- remote for a while, but they wanted me to move to come in everyday. Let me tell you, being in the office versus being at home working remotely is night and day. I knew remotely something was up in the office, but it is a SCENE! The manager/director is a full blown terror. She's awful to me on a daily basis (when she's not on a 2 week vacation to Greece - for real). Says I should know stuff that she actively withheld. Bad mouths me behind my back (the other employees tell me about it). And she's rude as hell. Talks over me, gaslights me, and files formal unfounded complaints about me. One colleague was actually nice to me for a hot second and I almost cried because I'm holding it all in. Most other co-workers are afraid to be seen talking to me because of this manager/director. and she has skip level boss wrapped around her finger. It's a nightmare. And I feel like everyone is in on it, like I barely have allies or just normal decent people to talk to. I'm literally in my office avoiding everyone because it's clear I'm radioactive. They all eat lunch right outside my office and don't say anything to me. They get quiet when I walk by. It's ridiculous. I know better, I know I should leave, but it's just so demoralizing.

As it says... basically, I keep going from one toxic workplace to another.

I have been at my new job for only 4 months now. The interview was amazing. It was so different to any other interview I've had. I felt so reassured, so positive, and so happy. It only took 2 weeks in the role for me to realise I was amongst a shit tonne of toxic people.

Only difference? My managers aren't toxic. My staff are... I manage two group homes for people with disabilities, and one of the homes is the most toxic workplace I've ever seen in my life. Like honestly, THE worst.

It didn't take me long to realise my staff hate me, for literally no reason. No workers from other homes want to work at that house. They always refuse, because the house has been toxic since forever.

Whether I'm nice, mean, or indifferent, they don't care. They're gossiping about me (and each other) even after being spoken to about gossip/code of conduct. Making up lies about me (and each other). And setting me up... they'll report things to me, I'll deal with it, and then the people who reported it to me (anon to others) will bag me out saying that I'm pretty?

My boss is lovely, but she keeps telling me not to worry about what they say and to let it slide. How can I? If the tables were turned, I'd be in a HR meeting.

I'm sick to death of it. Ive genuinely had enough. I haven't been to that second house for like a month because of this, and they're STILL talking about me. There's also been jabs at my age because I'm younger than their previous managers (who they also hated btw).

The disrespect is wild. What the fuck am I supposed to do? I'm sick of leaving jobs. I have been looking at what's out there, and the jobs are shit at the moment. As I said, I'm sick of hopping anyway.

Are there no normal workplaces? Why can't people just be fucking normal?

I'm struggling because in the real world, if this was happening to me, I'd confront and I'd rage. But I obviously cant do that. I'm at a loss. I want to scream. I keep falling into dark depression because of this shit.

Hi.

I'm 20s F and recently my organization hired a new manager (that I report to) 50s F.

Oh man, this woman is out to get me and I don't know how to distance myself enough. She takes credit for my work, lies like her life depends upon it and creates drama wherever she goes.

To you, she's going to talk shit about me. To me, she's going to talk shit about you. I can't trust her because everything she says is exaggerated or completely different.

I tried catching her on her lie, she blatantly denied and went like 'omg, I would never do thattt'... When in reality she did.

She thrives off of male attention which I don't really care for, like she can do whatever she wants but I don't know why she feels the need to drag me in the conversation with the random men she talks with. I have another colleague M 34 who she is totally okay with, no drama, doesn't badmouth him, always nice and kind to him but the complete opposite to me.

I'm reserved overall and it's really annoying that no matter how much I try to protect myself, she somehow keeps inserting herself.

And important point: not to toot my own horn, but I've been very kind and open to her because women in corporate need to stick together. But at this point, I'm done.

I really need some older brother/sister advice. How do I manage this? Is there any way to manage this?

I work at a tier-2 company, and the work environment has become extremely toxic. Recently, due to an organizational restructuring, our team was moved under a new manager. Since then, coming to work has been mentally exhausting.
She constantly compares us with other members of her team, saying they perform much better than we do. These comparisons are often made publicly during our DSMs, which feels humiliating and demoralizing.
As part of the team transformation, she conducted KT sessions. After few days, she publicly criticized us in front of multiple teams for not taking notes in physical notebooks, treating us more like school students than experienced professionals.
She also expects us to spend eight uninterrupted hours coding, even on days filled with meetings. If anyone steps away for a 15–20 minute tea break, she immediately sends messages in the team group questioning their absence.
The constant micromanagement, public humiliation, and unrealistic expectations have made the workplace highly stressful. I've been actively interviewing for opportunities outside the company, but the ongoing pressure has become increasingly difficult to cope with.

I dont really understand why it bothers me that my workplace has nasty people in it... theres nasty people everywhere it seems... I try my best to be at least cordial with people I don't understand why thats so hard for some people.. we dont gotta like each other to work in the same building. How do you guys navigate people being nasty to you at work?

I honestly don’t know where to go from here.
A few weeks ago, I filed a formal sexual harassment complaint against one of my leaders at work. It took me a long time to come forward because I kept convincing myself that maybe I was overthinking things or that if I just communicated my boundaries, everything would go back to being professional.
I eventually reported him after repeated incidents where he asked me to go out for drinks, suggested renting a hotel near our office, continued trying to have private interactions with me after I had already told him I was uncomfortable, and sent messages that he later unsent. I documented everything I could remember, but because some messages were unsent and most interactions happened verbally, there wasn’t much physical evidence.

The investigation has now concluded. HR informed me that because of insufficient evidence, they could not conclude sexual harassment to the extent that would justify termination. Instead, he received a suspension.

Starting tomorrow, I have to work with him again.
I feel defeated. I feel like I wasn’t heard. I understand that investigations require evidence, but it’s heartbreaking to know that something can happen repeatedly and still be difficult to prove.
I’ve been experiencing anxiety, trouble sleeping, and it’s already affecting my work performance. I even requested accommodations because of the impact this has had on my mental health.
I’m now questioning whether I should resign, file a complaint with a government agency, consult a lawyer, or simply try to move on. Part of me is angry at the company. Another part of me is exhausted and just wants peace.

I cant lose my job now because im the breadwinner of my family. I cant find similar jobs that has the same or higher pay that what i have right now.

Has anyone here been in a similar situation?
If you were in my position, what would you do next? Would you stay? Would you escalate the matter outside the company?
I’m genuinely looking for advice because I feel completely lost right now.

Over the last (almost) three years, I have worked for a boss who makes many of my days at work miserable. Before people comment to “find a new job” I am already looking and applying elsewhere. In the mean time I have no choice but to deal with his bullshit behavior, and poor communication style. He rarely shows any kind of appreciation for the work that I do. Instead, he is quick to find flaws and errors in everything. I do my best to submit a high quality work product, but I’m not perfect and bound to make mistakes on occasion. My only saving grace is that he lives far enough away that I don’t have to see him face to face. I want to report his behavior but I predict that his managers will just defend him because he’s a crazy workaholic with no boundaries who works late nights and some weekends. Please help with any advice on how to handle this until I can leave!
Thank you.

So, I just got fired recently, and it's been really hard to find work, as you can imagine.

However, the environment was toxic, and I was treated poorly while I was there. My boss was micromanaging, controlling and overly critical.

For example, she would give vague instructions on a task and then get upset because I didn't do it a certain way. This would lead to her being rude towards me. She would also have certain expectations that would constantly change, which is impossible to meet.

I would also get scrutinized if I did or didn't ask questions. If I asked questions, she would make me feel dumb and tell me it's a simple task, but then if I didn't ask questions, it was impossible to meet her elusive expectations.

This is just some of the many things she did that made it hard to work there.

Has anyone else dealt with a toxic work environment or a bad boss? If so, what did you do, or wish you did, to better support yourself?
I also want to know for the future, just in case...

P.S I worked in the HR department 😭

I left a company after an incredibly degrading 1.5 year period at the end of my 3 year tenure.

I was constantly talked down to, left out of conversations, work overlooked, and under resourced as a way to make things difficult for me and me only.

I performed very well despite it all and left when the slander and constant attacks felt unmanageable against an assortment of stress buildup in my personal life. It was an incredibly stressful time all around my life.

I worked with some of the most abrasive, condescending, and non collaborative people who I see celebrating their promotions, thanking each other, so full of positive wording and all, knowing how they treated me like shit and pushed me to quit while benefiting immensely from my work and time. I didn't want to leave, I had invested so much time and energy there, I wanted to work well with them, but I became the target.

I've done a lot since I left . I grown in many ways and have really built myself up, however I still find myself pissed off and ruminating over my time with people who probably don't even remember me after all that shit. Me leaving was just good riddance.

How do I let go? I feel like I need to move to the other side of the country and start over. I hate where I live. The chances of running into someone is near zero, but I feel too tied to that period.

I know it’s gonna sound pathetic that as a 25 year old I don’t know how to deal with this stuff, but I’ve never been bullied at all in my life, not at other jobs nor at school so I never had to adopt a different attitude to avoid it. It’s just that I got lucky to never be bullied till now.

I plan on leaving my job anyway but if anyone has advice as to deal with this next time then please reply in the comments:

I have this one co-worker who keeps making rude comments towards me at work and criticizing everything I do. No they aren’t a manager, but the boss really likes them so he lets them say and do whatever they want even when the cameras can pick up BOTH video and audio so the boss knows what’s happening but won’t do anything about it.

At the beginning of this job, I was sort of just acquaintances with this person-or at least that’s what I was trying to make it be. This person just kept calling me buddy and claiming I was their friend even though I never said I was.

A few months passed by, and I already knew this person was a red flag: again, them doing just anything because of the boss’s favoritism. Then one day we got into a heated argument while it was rush hour (I work in fast food) about how I just asked a few questions about what to do and where was what and they got very upset and claimed I didn’t know how to do my job.

Then after that I just stopped talking to them if I had a shift with them; I’d only speak to them if it was about a task but no more being friendly with them. Then one day they started telling everyone in the whole store that I was upset because I don’t want to be friends with them anymore and I said out loud that we were never friends and that I hate them and that of course caused another commotion.

It’s been about 6 months now and I’m at the point where I don’t want to go to work anymore because I know that person won’t get any consequences.

TLDR: I’m being bullied at work and don’t know what to do. Got any advice?

I work at a semi-small family-owned pizza shop that employs probably 100 people across all three locations and our bakery. I've worked for the company for around 2 years, and I really love my job and almost all of my coworkers. I have been considered for a promotion a few times, but because my availability is limited, I've been passed over for someone with a more flexible schedule.

The coworker, whom I'll call Anne, was hired about six months after me. I was already working my way to a promotion by then, and while I was really shy, I knew I was really a part of the team and well-liked by everybody (still mostly true).

Anne and I really hit it off in the beginning, as we had a lot of things in common and our personalities just generally worked as a duo. She was pretty good at the job from the beginning, and after she was trained, I felt a lot like we were equals (I worked only 3 days a week whereas she's full time, so my skills/experience built much slower).

However, after a few months, she suddenly started avoiding me, acting short with me, and nitpicking everything I did and going to one of our managers (whom everybody dislikes) about every breath I took. She developed a sort of nose-in-the-air attitude, like she was better than everybody, but she seemed to treat me especially different. I started getting really anxious and stressed out when I was on shift with her, always wondering what she was going to get me in trouble for next, which led me to make more mistakes than on shifts without her. I had to go home sick a couple of times because the stress was affecting me so much.

Back in October-November, I got an announcement on our schedule app that she was going to be a supervisor. And I >!threw up everything I ate.!< I had one of the worst panic attacks of my life, and nearly quit my job on the spot.

She makes me feel like I'm totally beneath her, and like I'm a horrible person just for existing in the same space as her. I have no idea what I did to deserve this kind of treatment, especially considering we went from getting along really well to not getting along at all.

She recently did something (I won't go into specific detail, but it just highlighted how terrible of a person she is) and the entire staff has beef with her. And many of them have come to me to say they see what I was trying to say all along. She's been making nice with all of our other coworkers because almost everyone stopped engaging in her drama, but not me.

She talks bad about everybody behind their backs, even going as far as to actually insult them to other people. I mostly ignore her when she's around, but because she's my direct superior, I have to listen to her enough to not get myself into trouble. I think she knows this because she'll delegate every task she can to me while basically standing around talking with my other coworkers. The only times she's helped me while I was drowning on my station was when it could make her look better and me look incompetent. Apparently, she's been talking especially bad about me, but I don't know the extent of what she's saying (I do plan to ask around and find out, however, so I can decide if I should be concerned or not)

I've asked her directly several times if there's something I did that's upsetting her, and the answer is always the same: it's not me, she just has something going on and it's affecting her emotionally. Every. Single. Time. I'm really starting to feel like her punching bag

I don't know if this is something I *can* bring to HR. I trust the coworkers that came to tell me what she's doing and that they see the way I'm being treated, but our HR lady has brushed me off a few times in the past, so I'm hesitant to bring something like this to her. I can talk to our GM, and he'll at least have some good advice on what I should do, but I don't want to bother him with something like this because he's very anti-drama. I've also been really afraid she'll retaliate in some kind of way and make things even harder for me or try to push me into quitting.

Should I ask the coworkers that came to talk to me to help me talk to HR and/or the GM, or try to handle it on my own? Is it even with trying to handle with the upper management? I don't want to sound bitter/spiteful because she was chosen over me for the promotion like I think they suspect, but I don't want the continued tension either. And is there any way to word it so it comes off as professional rather than just complaining?

Tl:dr my coworker, Anne, has been treating me like I'm completely beneath her, talking tons of shit about me behind my back, and giving me extreme anxiety and panic attacks just from being on the same shift. I don't have the confidence HR will handle it because I've been brushed off in the past, but I really feel like it needs to be addressed. I've tried addressing it directly with Anne, and she's said there's no problem but continues to treat me terribly.

I've been working in an environment where it feels like there's always a "hater" and an "enabler."

One person constantly criticizes or judges almost everything I do. It doesn't matter if I'm just doing my job, trying something new, or simply existing—there always seems to be a negative comment waiting. What's even more exhausting is that instead of addressing the behavior, the people around them either ignore it or enable it.

For a long time, I kept asking myself if I was the problem. I tried being understanding. I stayed professional. I avoided conflict. I kept hoping things would improve.

They didn't.

Eventually, I realized that not every workplace is worth fighting for. Sometimes the healthiest decision isn't proving your worth or waiting for people to change. Sometimes it's recognizing that a toxic environment stays toxic because the culture allows it.

I've accepted that these people probably won't change, and honestly, that's no longer my responsibility.

I'm choosing my peace over constantly feeling anxious before work, overthinking every interaction, and questioning myself.

Has anyone else experienced a workplace where one person's behavior was constantly tolerated or enabled? How did you know it was finally time to leave?