u/Cute-Gal3282

My friend group has no room for error. I make one mistake and suddenly I’m blamed for ruining everything, ruining the hangout, ruining the experience, even though what I said has nothing to do with it. If I call my friends out for talking behind my back to their other friends, I’ve ruined the time we were spending together cause apparently they were just venting to their friends about their feelings. I feel like I’m always the black sheep of the group and I’m lonely as hell

I have always been the person in the group that just can’t fit in. My friends don’t exclude me on purpose but it’s always like they’re closer to each other and it shows.
I always have different principles and opinions on events. When I confront my friends about what went wrong they’re always defensive. I’m somehow always the one at fault cause maybe I speak loudly despite having valid concerns.
It gets really lonely to be amidst people and still feel like I’m truly alone. They always seem to have taken pictures without me. Always seem to be talking to each other in a more friendly way than me and they just seem close knit. Have been friends with them for 10 years so cutting them off is tough
Life is getting tougher and this isn’t helping.

I’ll start
I look inside people without opening them.