Best Friends New Walking Red Flag
Best Friends New Walking Red Flag
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Best friend and I are both 29(F) and she met a guy (29) on Facebook dating. The day she met him on dating they went out for a date, and he came home with her and hadn't left her house for a week other than going to work. He was living with his sister and doesn't have a car. My best friend has her own house, car, job, and a 12 year old son. He has no children that we know of.
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When she called me to tell me about him, he kept checking in with her to see who she was talking too, I heard her say "yeah, I'm still on the phone" and I'm not sure if he said something to her or made a face or something but she said "oh don't be dramatic, I'll be off soon". To have ONLY met someone a week ago, it's way too early to make any remarks about her being on the phone.
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Fast forward a couple days, I was reached out to by her coworker who asked if I noticed if she changed at all. I informed her that the best friend had bailed on our twice a week walks but that was it, and the coworker said she was bailing on her as well. Things just felt off, and I began to worry. I may have overstepped, but I chose to look into his profile on Facebook and find his ex girlfriend and reach out to her. I let her know that she didn't know me but I was concerned for my friend and wanted to know if this guy was an okay guy. She saw my message but didn't respond for hours. When she did, the information shocked me.
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She had just turned 18 when they dated (he's pushing 30). She said he had an arrest record for drugs, and selling drugs, and was supposed to be going to rehab but he didn't go. She claimed he was also talking to underage girls and she also was accusing him or r\*ping her. She even sent me screenshots of the ex before her saying similar things about him.
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I worried for my friend, reached out to her mom and shared the information. The mom was with a couple friends and one of the friends called my best friend and we all met up without the new guy. I showed her everything. She cried and decided we all go back to her house and kick him out. She was heard broken and said she didn't know what to do, that she really liked him.
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Fast forward a week, I hadn't heard much from her other than that she was okay. I reached out to the coworker and asked how my friend was at work. The coworker told me that my friend was okay, and she was glad they were taking it slow now and that he wasn't at her house except for weekends. I blow up! They are STILL talking!? After EVERYTHING!? I don't know how to react, I'm so disappointed with her. She is better than him in every way, and deserves so much out of life. After her last relationship she just clings on to any guy that pays attention to her and I feel bad for her for that. She reached out once asking to see me, but I didn't respond. I don't know how to talk to her. I hate this choice she is making and I've always been by her side for every decision she's ever made, but this one I can't get behind. Any advice is appreciated.